"The Karen and the Mysterious Soup"
Karen stormed into the café like a hurricane in a Live, Laugh, Sue t-shirt. She slammed her purse onto the counter, startling the barista, a college student named Jake who had already accepted his fate.
Karen: "I ordered the tomato basil soup 12 minutes ago. It's not here."
Jake: "Ma'am, we're a smoothie bar. We don't even have soup."
Karen (leaning in): "Then why does your menu say 'Souper Tuesday'?"
Jake blinked at the chalkboard behind him, where someone had clearly misspelled "Super Tuesday Smoothie Special."
Jake: "That's a typo—"
Karen: "That's false advertising. I want my soup. Or a full refund. And a written apology from the CEO of Soup."
A hush fell over the café. A toddler dropped his banana.
Jake (deadpan): "Let me check the back." He disappeared into the kitchen, where he microwaved a bowl of Marinara sauce from last night's staff pizza party, dumped a handful of shredded "basil" (actually parsley), and presented it with a flourish.
Karen (tasting it): "…This is Italian. I wanted French."
Jake: "My mistake." He took the bowl, scribbled "French" on a post-it, stuck it to the side, and handed it back.
Karen stared. The post-it fluttered. Somewhere, a lawyer felt a disturbance in the Force.
Karen: "I'll take it. But I'm still leaving a one-star review."
Jake: "Understandable. Have the life you deserve."
Epilogue: The next day, the café's Yelp page featured a review titled "Souper Disappointing" with the footnote: "P.S. The 'French soup' gave me visions. I now know the truth about the moon landing."