Somehow, Axel made it back to his dorm.
He didn't remember the walk. Just the adrenaline bleeding out of him, replaced by something heavier. Numb and crushing.
He collapsed onto the bed, curling into himself, clutching his chest with trembling hands, head buried against his knees.
What was that?
That wasn't him. Couldn't be him.
So emotional. So reckless.
No, he was supposed to be different now. Mature. Detached. Cold. Calculating. That was who he was trying to be. That was who he needed to be.
He wasn't violent. He wasn't aggressive. Not anymore.
But the second he saw Cael, that version of himself, the one he buried, ripped to the surface like it had been waiting.
His fingers were still shaking.
Deep breath in. Deep breath out.
He sat there for a while, forcing his lungs to obey.
He'd messed up. Badly.
There was no way this wouldn't come back to bite him.
He doubted Mico would protect him. To her, this whole thing probably counted as an amusing experiment. Something to keep her entertained until it became inconvenient. If there wasn't value in backing him, she wouldn't.
And Cael?
Cael Dravik would retaliate. Axel had publicly humiliated him. And knowing Cael, he wouldn't forgive that.
But he could bear it.
Just like he always had.
He leaned back, head hitting the cold wall behind his bed. The air kissed at the sweat on his neck. For the first time in days, he felt raw again. Like he had the moment he'd first woken up in this world.
Stripped.
Exposed.
And Alone.
He hated that it got to him.
Hated even more how satisfying it had felt to swing that punch.
He let out a bitter breath. Nothing he could do about it now. He had class tomorrow.
Suck it up.
Like always.
…
The next morning came with far too much light and far too little sleep.
His eyes burned, shadows heavy under them. But he got dressed like nothing happened and headed to class.
As always, he took the seat beside Yanin. Same posture. Same blank face. Like the previous day hadn't ended in blood.
He pulled out his things with practiced indifference.
"Hey," Yanin said beside him, her voice cold and unreadable.
"Hi."
A pause.
"…Are you okay?" she asked, more hesitant this time.
"Yeah," Axel replied smoothly. "Yesterday, I lost control for a bit. But I'm all good now."
He felt her eyes linger on him.
She didn't believe him.
But she didn't press either.
"Okay," she murmured. "As long as you're fine."
The professor started lecturing about volcanic dungeon. Burn treatment, mana application, and what to do if you didn't have a healing potion.
Axel had a notebook open, but the page was half-covered in doodles, dragons, spell circles, and poorly drawn animals.
Yanin leaned toward him, voice low. "Why do you even carry a notebook if you're not going to write anything useful? You're not even pretending to pay attention."
He didn't look up. "It's for the aesthetic. Gotta keep up the intellectual vibe. First semester's easy anyway."
His memory, enhanced by Glowell's Guide, was practically photographic. Nothing in this class was new to him.
"…Smart bastard," she muttered, turning her head away.
"What was that?"
"I said you were a smart bastard," she repeated, louder this time.
Axel blinked. He hadn't expected her to say it to his face.
"Well, you're not wrong," he muttered. It was cheating, in a way. And he couldn't come up with a retort that didn't eat at his guilty conscious.
Class ended. Normally, he'd leave first, keep moving, avoid lingering.
But this time… he didn't.
He stopped just outside the door, causing Yanin to bump into his back.
"Move," she snapped.
"Not before you give me your number."
"…Is this a pickup line?" Her face curled in visible disgust.
"Please, I have way better ones." He paused. "Jokes aside, I'm serious. Can I get your number?"
The question hung there, heavier than he meant it to be.
"Why should I?" she said, eyeing him.
"'Cuz' we're friends… right?"
There it was. He'd said it out loud.
She blinked.
"…O-kay."
They exchanged numbers.
Axel offered a nod and walked off ahead, hands in his pockets like it didn't matter.
Yanin stood still, watching Axel's fleeting back.
Friend. My first friend.
Her lips twitched into something faintly resembling a smile.
…
His class with Selene and Landon passed by pretty quickly too. Axel was pretty out of it but didn't dare to rest as to not let Vale notice. Selene yapped away, her voice carrying the conversation Axel didn't want to be a part of. Landon occasionally chipped in as well.
Now, it was Theory. He sat next to Mico, dreading their inevitable conversation.
Sure enough, the moment he sat down—
"So, Axel," Mico said sweetly.
He sighed. "Yes, leader?"
"First of all, don't call me that." Her voice was light but carried a sharp edge. "Second, we have a lot to talk about. Don't you think?"
Her hands were folded neatly in front of her, expression unreadable. A small, curious smile pulled at her lips.
Axel didn't look at her. "It's improper to discuss this during class."
"Oh? So, you do have manners after all." She turned toward him, eyes glinting. "But alright. I'll wait. Just don't even think about trying to sneak off when the bell rings."
Her tone turned low, icy.
"You know I'll find you."
Axel pretended to be unfazed.
"…Got it," he said.