The long forgotten memories
Back in the suite, Valerie sat in silence, watching the sunlight fade on the marble floor. Her fingers toyed with the edge of the napkin she had brought from the restaurant absently, like it might hold the answers he hadn't given.
She didn't know what hurt more: the betrayal or the hope she still clung to.
Hope that the boy she once knew still lived inside the man in that suit.
Her heart struck like a vein was cut again as the memories of her past life flowed through her imaginations. Before her world crashed, before the death of her father, before her family's name became a scandal whispered behind closed doors, and before the brothel life, there was him.
She never knew his real name. He'd told her to call him Julian.
They met in the most ordinary way, in the park, on a Tuesday afternoon, under the old rusting iron gazebo where she loved to read after her classes. She nearly dropped her book the first time he spoke.
"That's a terrible place to hide tears," he'd said. "The sun hits you directly here."
Valerie had blushed, startled and indignant. "I'm not crying."
He smiled. "Then the wind must have blown some dirt in your eye?"
His eyes are dark and pleasant to see, unreadable, gloomy like the kind of night sky that swallowed the stars. His presence had been unlike any boy she had met. He looks a bit older perhaps, but not by much.
He never wore anything branded. Just some tailored coats, gloves even when it wasn't cold, and a quiet calm that made her feel like she was floating when he was near.
Julian became a routine. Every Tuesday at four, they would talk under the gazebo. Sometimes he'd bring pastries. Other times just riddles and quotes from dead poets. But once on a rainy day like this, he brought her a single red carnation.
"I will not always be able to come," he told her, pressing it into her palm. "But if I disappear, it won't mean I don't care."
Her throat tightened. " Are you in trouble?"
His smile had dimmed. "Let's just say, my family is made of shadows. And I'm tired of pretending I belong to the light."
"Let me steal your time my princess," he asked. "To a movie show downtown tomorrow night at 7pm."
Valerie's eyes widened, "I've not been to a movie before." she said, her face blushing and shy.
"Then I'd be glad to be the first to make you special," Julian concluded as he took his leave.
Valerie had longed for the day to end, she had prepared her most beautiful dress, a flowery gown her father had gotten for her on her last birthday even though he wasn't present he never forgot.
It was the first time Valerie saw him in anything normal.
No dark trench coat, no gloves, no slick aura of mystery. Julian stood in line at the tiny old-fashioned cinema near Westbridge Avenue, wearing jeans and a soft grey sweater that clung to his frame like it had been tailored for him. And he was smiling, not that quiet knowing smirk he wore like armor, but a real smile. The kind that made her heart do strange things.
"You came," he said, holding out his hand for her. Her breath frosted in midair.
Valerie tugged her scarf tighter, trying to hide the funny grin on her face. "I didn't know you really loved movies, I've not attended one since my mom died when I was 8." her smile faded.
"I don't," he said smoothly. "But I like you."
She looked away quickly, cheeks flaming.
The theatre was a tiny, ancient piece of historical artefact. Flickering marquee bulbs, velvet drapes, and the aroma of freshly buttered popcorn filled the air.
He let her pick the movie, a romantic drama from the 1990s that she had always wanted to watch on the big screen.
They sat in the back row, tucked into the shadows.
Julian didn't talk much during the first half, but his hand found hers halfway through the film. His fingers were warm, steady. And when her head drifted to his shoulder, he didn't move… just rested his cheek gently against her hair.
It felt like peace. Luke safety she didn't know she'd been craving.
The lovers on screen argued, kissed, broke apart, and came back. Valerie's throat tightened at the first lines.
"I was never afraid of losing you…I was afraid of never having you in the first place."
She felt Julian shift beside her, not away, but closer. His voice was barely a whisper:
"That's exactly how I feel around you."
She turned to look at him.
Something broke inside her… not painfully, but softly. Like ice melting in spring.
Their kiss was quiet, slow, more question than demand.
And when they left the theater, walking under strings of lights and distant stars, he held her hand like he didn't want to let go.
"Julian," she asked, "what are you running from?"
He paused.
The silence between them was longer than it should have been.
Then, softly, he said, "A family that destroys everything it touches."
She didn't press. Didn't need to.
Because at that moment, it didn't matter who he was… only who he was with her.
And for that one night, Valerie let herself believe she was safe.
But that was the last time she saw Julian. After 5 years now he's back as Alexander. The whole thought made her stomach sick as she lay on her bed.
Soon after, Celeste and her assistant Vivian came in to help her undress.
"You need to be calm and understand Mr. Alex," Celeste said. "You know, he never stops talking about his dream girl," she chuckled, removing Valerie's shoes, proceeding to a foot massage.
"He has always smiled when he talks about you, but the nightmares…" She paused.
"What nightmares?" Valerie questioned.
"What!" Celeste jerked like someone who had just spilled a secret.
Valerie stared at her in curiosity. "You said the nightmares…" raising her eyebrows.
Celeste, who is now trying to adjust her skirt and avoid the question.
"Ma'am, you need some rest. You've had a long day" She handed a white robe to Valerie and signaled for her assistance to come dress Valerie up.
Valerie stopped questioning Celeste. She's smart and she knows how to find her way anywhere just as she had found her way at the brothel.
The rest of the day was peaceful and sweet, Valerie ate more than enough at the dinner hall after Alexander arrived from his business meeting.