Big Horn, the male deer lovingly raised by Nara Hirako, was also considered a full-fledged member of the family.
Over the past few years, Nara Shikadan had often traveled between Konoha and Kikyo Castle on weekends and holidays—riding on Big Horn's back like a young lord of the forest.
In fact, Shikadan often suspected that Big Horn held a higher status in the family than he did.
And the worst part?
As Nara Hirako silently wielded a gleaming kitchen knife, Shikadan followed her into the kitchen and sat down obediently at the table. He had seen too much—evidence both overt and subtle!
"I didn't plan on heading back to Kikyo Castle today. Dajiao and I didn't agree to meet up today either."
His meaning was clear: he didn't know where that damned deer was.
Big Horn, after all, was a male deer.
And a male deer under Hirako's tender care... lived a far more decadent life than people might imagine. He had already hooked up with countless female deer across the forest.
Shikadan was definitely not jealous.
...Really.
"So why'd you come back?" Hirako asked while stirring the pot and casually adding oil. She turned to glance at her son.
"Don't tell me it was another blonde sister who brought you home?"
"You're scary good at guessing," Shikadan replied with a sniff. He could already smell the scent of fried eggs wafting in the air.
"But... didn't Nono explain everything to you?"
Hirako snorted as she poured boiling water into the pot and began adding cut barbecue pork, ham, deer antlers, and other rich ingredients. The golden fried eggs rose and fell in the milky broth, sending waves of aroma into every corner of the kitchen.
"Nono?" she echoed, tossing in a handful of noodles and pinching in some greens.
"She just said you were back. I thought you were staying the night at Kikyo Orphanage! Ha!"
If you two—these so-called 'loving parents'—could give me just a drop of familial warmth, I wouldn't have grown up like an orphan...
Shikadan sighed internally.
But faced with a bubbling pot of luxury-grade pork ramen, he wisely refrained from saying anything harsh or depressing.
"I came back with Tsunade-hime today."
Hirako froze mid-motion and nearly dumped the pot straight into the sink.
"...Tsunade-hime?!"
"Yeah."
"Tsunade-hime—as in one of the Legendary Sannin?!"
"Yup."
"You?? You can actually hook up with someone like Tsunade-hime?!"
Hirako walked over with a bowl of ramen, placed it in front of her son, and unceremoniously pinched his chin, tilting his face back and forth.
"Other than being good-looking, what advantages do you even have?"
"And this pretty face—that's all thanks to your dad's good genes!"
"Love truly is blind," Shikadan muttered, shaking his head as he broke free.
"I inherited both your genes! Just wait—I'll be even more handsome than Dad!"
"No matter how much you flatter me, I won't change my mind, Little Horn," Hirako smirked, sitting down beside him with a glass of water.
"Shusuke is the most handsome man in Konoha... in the Land of Fire... no, in the entire ninja world!"
What's going on?! This sour smell—this is 100% a love comedy scenario!
Shikadan numbly slurped his noodles. Even the system prompt of [Stamina +1] couldn't bring him back to his senses.
"So?" Hirako asked, cocking her head. "What's the deal with Tsunade-sama?"
Shikadan briefly summarized the events of the day.
"A spy?"
Hirako's expression turned serious. But when her eyes settled on her noodle-slurping son, her concern evaporated.
"According to Tsunade-sama, the spy was most likely from Iwagakure. And if that's the case, then Hidden Rock may have already set its sights on Kikyo Castle."
Shikadan twirled a strand of noodle, speaking carefully.
"The atmosphere of war is getting heavier. Even though Kikyo Castle is in the center of the Land of Fire, it's still right next to Konoha."
"With ninja mobility being what it is, no one knows if the enemy might attempt a direct strike on Kikyo Castle."
With no resistance or interference, Konoha's forces could charge into the Land of Wind in just three days.
That was the frightening mobility of shinobi forces.
Shikadan wasn't omniscient. He only knew the broad strokes of the Third Ninja World War.
He knew that Konoha would emerge victorious—but that didn't mean he had every battle mapped out in his head.
And since they'd already discovered spy activity in Kikyo Castle...
And since Hirako was a long-retired Chūnin, and Shusuke a civilian doctor with no combat ability...
"Once the war begins, Kikyo Castle won't be safe—at least not for our family."
Shikadan looked up solemnly.
"I suggest we move into central Konoha. Specifically, the top-floor corner apartment next to the Ninja Academy."
"That area is close to the Hokage Building and the Academy. It's easily one of the safest zones in the entire village."
Konoha Year 48.
The Third Ninja War was no longer a matter of if, but when.
Shikadan couldn't protect the entire village.
But he'd do everything to protect the people he cared about.
"War… moving..." Hirako frowned.
As a retired ninja, she didn't object to retreating from a high-risk area. But her husband, Nara Shusuke, worked at the Pharmaceutical Research Institute and held a critical position.
Moving would not be simple.
"I'll talk it over with Shusuke."
Then Hirako fixed her eyes on her son.
"And you? If your father and I move into that apartment, what about you?"
"..."
Shikadan was quiet for a moment.
"That apartment is pretty spacious. More than enough for three people."
"Tsk!"
Shikadan's eyes widened.
Did you just—pout?! I'm only twelve!
Did Nara Hirako, former Chūnin, just pout?
"Still such a hassle," she muttered, picking up the empty bowl.
"I'm better at taking care of my husband than managing school-aged kids…"
"If only Konoha Ninja Academy had a boarding option."
"...Hirako, I've already graduated."
The next morning, breakfast.
"Little Horn, I heard you graduated from the Ninja Academy?" Nara Shusuke asked casually as he dug into a plate of omelette rice made with his dear wife's 'special love.'
Strangely, he thought Shikadan seemed extra energetic today—eating with loud grunts.
After last night's parental drama, Shikadan had given up all hopes for this walking rom-com couple.
So his father's question didn't faze him at all.
"Yeah. If all goes as planned, I'll be interning at the animal taming and rehabilitation unit today."
No team assignments. No teammates to meet. No sensei to report to. He just needed to show up on time at the Medical Department.
"The rehabilitation unit is definitely less strenuous than other divisions," Shusuke said, nodding. "But your body..."
He was well aware of Shikadan's chronic weakness.
After all, he was the one who personally brewed the Nara Secret Medicine that Shikadan took every day to support his [Shadow Secret Technique] training.
"I didn't have time to explain everything yesterday," Shikadan said, looking up from his bowl.
"My body's condition... has basically been resolved."
[Lacquer Eyes]!
Black shadows flared across Shikadan's pupils.
Both parents blinked in surprise.
"So this is the jutsu you've been working on all these years?" Hirako leaned closer to study his eerie eyes.
"Creepy as hell!"
Shikadan finished the activation and went back to eating.
"That's why I'm planning to stop by the ninja tool shop later to buy a pair of sunglasses."
And also... chakra test paper.
Until his power reached a certain level, the essence of combat in the shinobi world was an information war.
With poor intel, even elite jōnin could be ambushed and killed. With good intel, even a chūnin could trick an immortal monster.
Shikadan never underestimated the importance of secrecy.
"So now that your body's fine... does that mean I don't need to brew the secret medicine anymore?" Shusuke asked thoughtfully, stroking his chin.
"To be honest, making that stuff is a pain. It really cuts into my 'romantic time' with your mother."
Stop taking the medicine?
Shikadan's head snapped up.
Impossible!
He'd practiced [Shadow Secret Technique] as usual last night.
But the real surprise had come after taking the medicine—
[Stamina +1]
Consuming high-nutrient substances really did boost [Stamina] growth!
If he hadn't been so full last night, he would've experimented with Ration Pills right away!
Ration Pills weren't just rich in nutrients—they were easy to absorb, had stimulating and calming effects, and could restore chakra and stamina in massive amounts.
According to unreliable gossip, one Ration Pill could let a ninja fight for three days and nights without rest.
A single pouch of Nara Secret Medicine gave him +1 [Stamina].
Just imagine what a Ration Pill would do.