Dust still hung in the air like somebody had shaken a carpet over Dove's bed.The hole in the ceiling was massive — a jagged, splintered gash straight up into the night sky.
And all Dove could think about was his landlord.
Holy shit.That cranky old bastard was going to roast him, fry him, then eat him for dinner.And probably bill him for the seasoning too.
He stared at the gaping hole, then at the intruder sprawled face-down in the debris.And the guy?A mountain of muscle, long blond hair splayed across the floor like someone had murdered a very expensive wig. A beer-gut-that-wasn't-really-a-gut and arms like they'd been carved by a sculptor with a crush on biceps.
More importantly, the guy was snoring.
"Oh no. No, no, no…"Dove grabbed the first thing he could reach — a wooden plank that had survived the crash — and edged closer.
He gave the giant a cautious jab.Nothing.Jab again.Still snoring.
That was the last straw.
He leaned over and whacked him on the shoulder.
And then the words just burst out.Not "Are you okay?"Not "Who are you?"Nope.
"Why the fuck did you break the roof? Can't you see the door, hooligan?!"
That sure woke him up.
The guy blinked at Dove like someone had just told him to do algebra.Then — as if it was the most natural thing in the world — he grinned.
A big, dumb, drunken grin."Ah… mortal," the guy rumbled in a voice that was one part growl and one part amusement. "Sorry 'bout the entrance."
Dove stared, mouth agape, plank still raised like he was going to do anything with it.
"You're sorry?! That's what you're going with?! Do you have any idea what my landlord's gonna do to me?!"
The guy propped himself up slowly, like his bones weighed a ton."You worry too much," he slurred, rubbing his head."Roofs are like shields — they can always be rebuilt."
Dove felt his eye twitch."Why? Are you a carpenter?!"
That stopped the guy short — a loud bark of laughter bursting out of him like a keg being tapped.
"Name's Thor," the guy finally said as if that explained everything.He swayed a little as he got to one knee — and then promptly decided that was a terrible idea and stayed sitting.
Dove stared harder."Thor," he echoed flatly."Of course. Because my day wasn't weird enough."
And sure — most people would probably have been star-struck to meet some god of thunder.But Dove?He was just calculating the repair bill.
"You gonna help pay for the damage, Thunder-boy?" he asked."Or am I telling my landlord a drunk cosplayer smashed through my roof and took a nap?"
Thor tilted his head like someone had asked him what a mortgage was.
Then, a beat later, his grin returned — bigger this time — and he clapped a hand on Dove's shoulder with a strength that nearly folded him in half.
"Relax," Thor boomed. "I like you already, mortal."
And Dove, crushed halfway to the floor and seeing his security deposit flash before his eyes, thought,
Of course. Of fucking course I liked this guy too.