"No, no, of course not. We haven't been able to observe your daily life since last year," Mr. Paradox explained.
"We can only track certain events in your universe. Your world is like a mist, especially around you, making it impossible for us to get close. Still, we all saw the recent encounter between the two Captain Americas in your world."
He gave a thumbs-up. "That was a wonderful clash. Everyone is looking forward to the follow-up."
Malrick realized there must have been countless eyes watching him during that time.
"I'm looking forward to it too," he replied, ready to continue his questions.
Before he could, Deadpool barged in, clutching his head.
"Wait, wait, wait! What are you two talking about? Superman? Did Marvel and DC finally drop a crossover this year?"
He jabbed Malrick's chest with his finger.
"Or are you actually Hyperion? Maybe a Sentinel? Don't tell me this is all a big reference meme—oh my god, your pecs feel so comfortable!"
Holland's Spider-Man tilted his head in shock.
"Wait… I just heard Stark? Is Malrick's name Stark?"
He turned wide-eyed. "Then Malrick, do you know Tony? Tony is also a Stark!"
"Yes," Malrick said casually. "Tony's my older brother. You can ask him for a hug sometime."
With disdain, he pressed his time pad against Deadpool's face, pushing him away without even touching him.
"As for you, stay away from me."
"Hey! Hey! Just let me touch again! Oh god, I feel like I'm about to—" Deadpool stumbled backward, clutching the pad on his face.
Malrick ignored him. He turned to the group of younger Spider-Men, who were curiously closing in.
"Stop. I know what you're about to ask. Yes, I am Superman."
The clothes on his body shimmered and shifted, forming a sleek, metallic-looking black battle suit. Dormammu's cloak unfurled behind him as he floated a few inches off the ground.
"Huh? Not just a codename, but really like the Superman from comics?" the Spider-Men gawked.
Deadpool screeched dramatically, hands clamped to his cheeks.
"What did I just witness? Did Marvel really buy Superman's rights to make a movie—starring me as the sidekick?!"
He pointed accusingly. "I thought you were from Hogwarts, but you're actually from DC! No wonder you're so serious all the time!"
He suddenly dropped his voice and put on a deep tone.
"Hi… I'm not Deadpool. I'm Batman. Clark, wanna come over to Wayne Manor tonight? It's big, lots of room for… fun."
"Get lost." Malrick backhanded him into the floor before he could spout more nonsense.
But the Spider-Men were relentless.
"Oh my god, Malrick, so you're Kryptonian?"
"No, I'm human, but I carry Kryptonian bloodline."
"Then you're a hybrid? Was your dad Clark, or was your mom Kara? You used heat vision before—that wasn't magic? Do you also have freeze breath?!"
Holland led the interrogation while Gwen, Toby, and Garfield piled on. Four Spider-Men were like a hundred reporters, overwhelming him with questions.
"Now I know why Peter Parker became a journalist," Malrick muttered.
Annoyed, he unleashed his telekinesis, freezing the Spider-Men in place. Silence finally returned.
Nearby, Mr. Paradox's smile twitched. A nervous flicker passed through his eyes.
"Mr. Stark… you can still use powers inside the TVA?" he asked, dabbing sweat from his forehead.
"That's right," Malrick said with a half-smile. "Seems your little anti-magic field doesn't work on me."
He crossed his arms. "Speaking of which, I came here with Deadpool for a reason. Why did you destroy his universe early?"
"This, this…" Mr. Paradox's forehead beaded with sweat. "You really let him drag you here? That's… incredible."
"What's so incredible?!" Deadpool popped up, fully healed again. He wrapped an arm around Malrick's shoulder, patting his chest with the other hand.
"C'mon, now I'm Marvel's best-seller! Of course Kevin brought in Superman to spice things up!"
He whispered, "Clark, how much are they paying you? Over a hundred million? Split some with me, I'll help you steal more scenes."
Malrick's eyes narrowed, glowing faintly red as they drifted to Deadpool's hand.
"Hey, hey! Just kidding!" Deadpool jerked his hand back. "Why so serious?"
He rubbed his palm with a shiver. "Damn… that chest. I swear humanity peaked with this battle suit."
Before Malrick could swat him again, Deadpool leaned toward Mr. Paradox.
"Tell me, why bring Superman but not Batman? Without Batman, how do we fight Superman?" He dropped his voice into a fake gravelly growl. "I'm Batman."
Then, whispering urgently, he said, "Paradox, Batman bought us some time. Hurry. Before Superman gets corrupted by the Anti-Life Equation, tell me why the TVA destroyed his universe early! I need your boss!"
Mr. Paradox froze. His eyes darted nervously. Around the room, TVA employees stiffened, their panic obvious.
Deadpool grinned beneath his mask.
"Ha! Knew it. You're hiding something from your superiors. Busted."
"No! That's nonsense!" Mr. Paradox snapped. He grabbed a pruning stick from a nearby agent and thrust it at Deadpool.
The stick—standard TVA equipment—could disintegrate its target into the Void at the end of time.
"Whoa! Trying to kill me already? Guess I was right." Deadpool raised his time pad to block.
The pruning stick struck it. In an instant, the pad melted away, dissolving like metal in lava.
"…You tried to kill me," Deadpool whispered, staring at his empty hand.
"You're spouting nonsense!" Mr. Paradox shouted, lunging again with the stick.
This time Deadpool was ready. He twisted Paradox's wrist, spun the weapon, and drove it into his attacker's chest.
As Mr. Paradox's body disintegrated, Deadpool muttered in mock solemnity,
"Didn't think he had a conscience. Guess he committed suicide out of guilt."
_____
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