Six months later
I was wandering the yard, worn out and miserable, my clothes torn to shreds.
The night had fallen into pitch-black silence. After long hours of exhausting work, the late hours of the night had taken over. A weight of fatigue pressed on my shoulders.
I no longer felt the absence of my wings.
I had no special powers left to sense where people were, no wings to take me somewhere in a flash.
I had learned how to walk slowly.
How to run to catch up with something.
But when Luciel left... I never saw him again.
I only saw him in my dreams at night.
And that hurt me more than anything.
Kelina's voice broke through my thoughts as she touched my shoulder.
"Come on, help me wash the remaining carpets."
Kelina was my friend from the carpet washing factory. She'd become my confidant in a short time and listened to my pain.
Of course, she had no idea I was once an angel.
She simply thought I was an ordinary, unfortunate girl.
And maybe… she wasn't wrong.
The detergent clinging to the carpets filled my nose.
"I'm coming," I said, my feet reluctantly moving toward her.
We went inside, our footsteps echoing off the hard floor. We just wanted to get the job done.
There was always a silent agreement between Kelina and me about that.
We added warm water and detergent into the clean water tank.
Just then, a horn honked.
It had to be Ms. Nina, our boss.
When I turned around, I wasn't wrong.
Kelina plugged in the machine.
I curiously turned my head. Ms. Nina stepped out of her car, her curly blonde hair bouncing, her shiny gray purse in hand.
The moonlight winked at her.
But her face wore a different expression this time.
She shut the doors and walked toward the building—without a single word of greeting—and stepped inside.
Business hadn't been going well lately.
We blamed her grumpiness on that.
Kelina unplugged the machine and pressed the shampoo spray button.
I started using the machine carefully, starting from the far end of the carpet toward the door.
The smell of cleanliness made my lungs celebrate. It reminded me of the perfumes I used to smell while flying over humans.
We heard Ms. Nina's footsteps climbing the stairs.
"She's coming," said Kelina, pressing her lips into a tight line. "What do you think she'll say this time?"
Whenever Ms. Nina came, she'd always say something.
Complain about life.
"I don't know," I murmured, continuing to move the machine.
As I kept working toward the door, I heard her voice behind me.
"Turn it off, Ellion."
Her presence stood behind me like a wall. I had always been a little afraid of her.
My hands trembled as I hit the off button.
My heart tightened with fear, just like always.
The blank expression on her face reminded me of the smile Luciel wore the night he left me.
"Look, I'm really sorry we've come to this," she said.
She paused and took a deep breath, as if struggling to gather her words.
"When I opened this place, I dreamed I'd be a successful businesswoman. I believed we had everything to be the best carpet cleaners…"
I saw Kelina's trembling hands beside me.
Trying to guess what she'd say next felt like a punch in the gut.
"But now… I see that's not true.
I can't pay the rent anymore.
And I'm afraid my health won't let me keep trying…"
Kelina gave a choked sob.
I knew she cared for her bedridden father with her tiny paycheck.
"So… we're closing the place," Ms. Nina said, her eyes scanning the room filled with the scents of soap, shampoo, and damp fabric.
Her memories passed through her eyes like shadows.
"We're losing our jobs?" Kelina said with a trembling voice.
"Who else would hire us?" she muttered like someone in a trance.
Given the times we were living in, it was a fair question.
Ms. Nina didn't dare say much else.
"Thank you for all your hard work. I'm sorry… A truck will come to collect the equipment. You can change and head out."
She looked us in the eyes.
"Oh, and your salaries… they'll be a week late," she added with guilt, then slowly turned away.
That's when my loneliness slapped me in the face again.
After Luciel, I had been thrown into this world with no wings, no money, no one.
"Okay," I whispered, glancing down at my torn sweatpants and apron.
What difference would protesting make now?
What could I possibly change?
As Ms. Nina walked away, Kelina began to cry beside me.
It hurt.
I knew how helpless she felt.
"Don't cry," I said, my voice barely audible.
"How will I take care of my father?" she whispered as the footsteps around us faded.
Suddenly, a phone rang.
I knew it was Kelina's by the ringtone.
She quickly wiped her eyes and pulled her phone from her apron pocket.
As I glanced over, a name flashed on the screen.
My heart clenched.
A name from my past.
The name that still bled through my soul.
She rejected the call before I could read it again.
But I had seen enough.
Luciel.
It had to be a coincidence.
Just a name. That's all.
Why did I shiver as if there was only one Luciel in the entire world?
"Who was that?" I asked as usual.
"Forget it," she sniffled, wiping under her eyes. "Let's just get changed."
I nodded slowly, but my mind wouldn't let go of that name.
Luciel.
The only man I had ever loved.
The man I had betrayed God for.
The one who had forgotten everything we had.
We walked inside.
A musty, sour smell clung to the hallway—probably from the bathroom next to the changing room.
We held our noses as we entered.
A cold breeze blew in from somewhere.
Kelina shut the windows and waited for me to close the door before she changed.
I pushed the door gently and my eyes welled up.
I couldn't even see one step ahead of me.
As if being broke was the only thing left to lose.
Hadn't missing him torn me apart enough?
I went to the locker and took out my jeans and T-shirt.
I moved slowly, like I was underwater.
We got out of our aprons and filthy clothes, put everything into our bags without a word.
Kelina looked around the room one last time, resting her hand on her forehead. She sobbed again, this time even softer.
"Let's go," I said gently.
She nodded, wiping her cheeks.
We looked for Ms. Nina in the hallway, but she was gone.
I couldn't blame her. Maybe it was better that way.
"It's time, Kelina," I said again.
"Okay," she replied, her voice low.
I didn't want her to cry again.
The door felt farther away than it should've been.
We threw our bags over our shoulders and walked slowly.
That's when I saw it—another car parked behind Ms. Nina's.
The moonlight danced on its metal plate.
"Whose car is that?" I asked.
Visitors were rare.
Kelina squinted toward the angle and sighed.
Just then, I felt a shadow behind me.
It was suffocating.
My hands and feet went cold.
A burnt wood scent mixed with ash.
My head spun. I thought I might fall.
I turned, and my heart stopped.
Luciel.
My punishment.
My eyes trembled under the weight.
The roots of two trees born under betrayal had dried.
Six months passed before my eyes like a curse.
Longing chewed through my chest.
I didn't know what to say or do.
My shoulders trembled, then dropped.
He looked at me with emptiness.
His brows were drawn, two faint lines forming on his forehead.
When he lost his memory, I was the first to question him.
He had to remember that—at least vaguely.
That tension in his face… was it recognition or rejection?
Before I could read him more, his gaze shifted past me.
"Kelina, why haven't you answered my calls?"
His voice was cold and steady.
I turned to Kelina, barely holding in a sob.
She looked ashamed. Her cheeks turned pink.
And that was enough to shatter me.
I clenched my fists.
My nails left crescent moons in my palms.
"I'll explain later," she said, eyes on the floor.
Then she looked at me.
"Let me introduce you.
This is my friend Ellion."
Her eyes flicked to the chain hanging from his shirt.
"Ellion, this is Luciel…"
She paused.
And then came the blow:
"My new boyfriend."
Everything flipped upside down.
The fire of hell burned through that one sentence.
I hadn't even cried yet, but I already knew…
Luciel was nothing more than a stranger now.
Luciel reached out to shake my hand.
"Nice to meet you."
I shrank into myself.
I couldn't touch that hand—scorched by heat, once mine.
I just stared at it.
Time moved like shovels of dirt over my chest.
"Likewise…" I whispered, extending my hand.
Our eyes met.
I saw all my past and the poison of every memory.
He saw nothing.
I mumbled to hide my tears.
"Nice to meet you."
His eyes flickered, as if a shadow crossed them.
I tried to find myself there.
But I realized…
This was my sentence.
To live knowing he would never remember me.
Not in this life.
Not ever.