It had been six years since that night—since Lyra lost her mom, and with her, everything she knew. And somehow, even after all this time, she still held on to her mom's words. That promise. That maybe, one day, she'd find people who'd stay. People who'd really see her. People she could laugh with. Cry with. Survive with.
"Lyra! Lyra!"
Goldie's voice broke into the silence of the morning, sharp and loud.
Lyra groaned from her bed. It was 5:30 a.m., but it felt like 3. Her head was heavy. Her body ached like it hadn't rested at all.
"Just ignore her," she muttered, pulling the blanket over her head. Goldie was never calm about anything. For all Lyra knew, it was just another false alarm. Maybe a bug. Maybe a bad dream. Probably nothing.
But Goldie kept yelling. And it got louder.
Lyra finally snapped.
"The fuck, Goldie?!" she yelled. "The fuck you want?!"
Goldie stood in front of the mirror like she hadn't just screamed Lyra's name ten times. She was already half-dressed, checking out her outfit.
"So you're awake. Come on, we gotta prep for Band-In Day. And help me pick out an outfit, please."
Lyra sat up slowly, eyes dull. "That's why you woke me up? Band-In's not till ten. It's 5:30."
Goldie spun a little. "Yeah, but still! Isn't it exciting?"
Lyra blinked. Her voice was dry. "Thrilling." She got up and headed to her wardrobe. "I'm getting a pill."
Goldie turned to her. "Seriously? You're getting high now?"
Lyra didn't say anything. Just opened the drawer and grabbed the small bottle.
"Right before Band-In Day?"
Lyra looked at her. "So is waking someone up at 5 a.m. to rate outfits."She tossed the pill into her mouth with no hesitation.
"Just help me pick something to wear." Goldie sighed and dropped onto the bed. Lyra followed. They both stared at the ceiling.
"Whatever," Lyra muttered. The pill was starting to hit. Things were slowing down.
Goldie turned to face her. "What's up with you, Lyra? Getting high this early? Not even caring about Band-In Day?"
Lyra didn't answer for a second. Then, "You woke me up at 5 a.m. to rate outfits. But I'm the crazy one." She scoffed. "Bitch."
Goldie laughed softly. "Asshole." Then her voice softened again. "You really not excited? The day we stop going to those stupid classes?"
Lyra stared up. "Yeah. And start getting sent on death missions that don't end well. That's real exciting. Yay, right?"
Goldie watched her. "I get it now, you're scared."
"Shut up," Lyra whispered and rolled over, her back now facing Goldie.
Goldie didn't leave. She moved closer and reached out. "Come here. It'll be okay."
They were both scared. Even if they didn't talk about it. Even if they pretended.
Lyra felt her throat tighten. "Yeah... I guess," she mumbled.
She wasn't okay. Not really. The tears slipped out, quiet. She didn't wipe them. Didn't hide them. Just let them fall. She thought of her parents. Of her mom's voice. Of the curse. Of how short everything felt. How short it is.
Later, Lyra and Goldie walked into the main hall. The place was bright. Too bright. The kind of bright that felt fake. Music played. People laughed. The students were excited.
Lyra kept her head low. She couldn't understand them. Couldn't feel what they felt. She couldn't just live in the moment, like they did, she didn't try. They were smiling like this was something to look forward to.
She didn't feel that way. Not at all. "Unlike me," she whispered under her breath.
Goldie stepped closer from behind, gently tapping her shoulder. "Stay in the moment," she said.
Lyra nodded a little.But inside, she knew she couldn't. When your life has a definite time limit… you don't just live in the moment. You start counting them.