Can you still defend yourself when you're taking a dump?, the answer is of course not.
Li Chang'an wasn't an idiot. The moment he broke through Huyan Zhuo's defenses with a single axe strike, he immediately retreated to a safe distance—leaving poor Huyan Zhuo still squatting on the spot...
In truth, there were a full thirty seconds between the onset of stomach cramps and the final disaster. If Huyan Zhuo had moved faster, maybe—just maybe—he could've made it to the latrine. But never in a million years did he expect his body to betray him so completely. When it came, it just... came.
All in all, the onlookers were baffled. From their perspective, Li Chang'an's victory seemed bizarre and inexplicable. Regardless, the arena now stank to high heaven. The reputation of the Elephant Armored clan? Ruined. Thoroughly and embarrassingly so.
As soon as the foul stench started spreading, the spectators fled in a panic. Li Chang'an was no exception—though he ran in a very specific direction: the same one Qian Renxue had taken.
"You ran pretty fast. I won, didn't I?"
Li Chang'an casually grabbed Qian Renxue's arm with a teasing smile. Of course, before doing so, he'd already surveyed the area. Not many people around, and none he recognized—so no risk of getting caught.
For reasons she couldn't quite explain, Qian Renxue's cheeks turned red as soon as Li Chang'an touched her. She had to admit—over the past ten years, no man had stirred her emotions more easily than him. Not even close.
"Let go of me. That was just a coincidence. Doesn't count."
This time, Qian Renxue actually used a bit of strength to fling his hand away—but even she didn't realize: she wasn't as angry about it as she used to be.
"I'm not listening, You're just being unreasonable now. I clearly won, alright?"
Li Chang'an insisted stubbornly. he didn't want to gave up this opportunity.
"Fine. We'll talk about it the day I leave."
Qian Renxue simply kicked the can down the road, deftly slipping away. In her heart, she'd already decided—when the time came, she'd leave early.
"Alright! You said it!"
Li Chang'an didn't give chase. He just shouted after her:
After Qian Renxue left, Li Chang'an strolled around the academy for a bit. He wandered aimlessly until class was about to start, then slowly made his way toward the training grounds.
Halfway there, someone called out to him.
It was none other than Ghost Douluo—the same person who had once escorted him to the Pope's Palace.
"Uncle Ghost! What brings you here today?"
Li Chang'an was very respectful. After all, this man was a serious backer.
As always, Ghost Douluo was clad in black, his aura carefully concealed.
"You made that Huyan Zhuo shit his pants?"
Li Chang'an immediately froze, black lines streaking across his forehead.
"Uncle Ghost, he came looking for trouble with me, alright? I didn't go after him."
Ghost Douluo nodded calmly, not bothering to argue.
"We're in the middle of bringing the Elephant Armored clan into Spirit Hall. I'm sure you've heard. But after you humiliated them twice—especially this time, where they utterly lost face—they're understandably furious."
In truth, with Li Chang'an's identity, even if he crippled both Huyan Zhuo and Huyan Li, it wouldn't be a big deal. The problem was, he hadn't given them even a shred of dignity. He won in a single move—twice—and this time even made them a literal laughingstock. Now, things had escalated.
At the end of the day, it all came down to face.
"Uncle Ghost, if I'm not wrong, then the clan Master of the Elephant Armored clan is probably in the Pope's Palace right now, trying to bargain with my teacher, right?"
Li Chang'an responded quickly, instantly grasping the bigger picture.
Ghost Douluo looked at him in mild surprise. 'No wonder Her Holiness sent me to check in—this kid's already anticipated everything.'
"You're right. That old man Huyan Zhen is in the middle of complaining to the Pope right now. He's really playing it up, saying Spirit Hall doesn't respect the clans that join us—that we humiliate our allies at will…"
Ghost Douluo gave a brief rundown of the current situation. The Pope, Bibi Dong, was in the crucial phase of subduing the four subordinate clan, and now wasn't the time for any missteps.
"Then take me to the Pope's Palace, Uncle Ghost. I'm confident I can counter that old man's arguments."
Li Chang'an made up his mind. The situation might look big, but in reality it was just empty posturing—politics. And as a modern-day student, this was his bread and butter. It was also a good chance to gain visibility in Spirit Hall's decision-making circles—laying the groundwork for the future.
"You?"
Ghost Douluo raised an eyebrow—but after thinking it over, he nodded in agreement. Although the Pope hadn't explicitly summoned Li Chang'an, his instincts told him: bringing the kid might be surprisingly effective.
So once again, Ghost Douluo tucked Li Chang'an under his arm and took off with a few quick bursts of speed, landing outside the Pope's Palace in no time. Only then did he let down a dizzy, nauseous Li Chang'an.
"Uncle Ghost, if you keep carrying me like that, I'm not gonna play with you anymore…"
Li Chang'an rubbed his belly, took a moment to compose himself, and then followed Ghost Douluo inside after they announced themselves.
As soon as he entered, he saw his teacher sitting in the Pope's seat, resplendent in her ceremonial robes. Beside her sat an elderly man—undoubtedly Huyan Zhen.
Standing behind Bibi Dong was a man dressed in yellow, with an unusually feminine aura. That must be Chrysanthemum Douluo.
"Chang'an? Why are you here?"
Bibi Dong frowned slightly when she saw them. She didn't think Li Chang'an could help—she worried he might make things worse.
"Your disciple is here to share your burden, Teacher!"
Li Chang'an bowed deeply, his tone solemn.
"So you're Li Chang'an?"
Before Bibi Dong could respond, the old man from the Elephant Armored clan, Huyan Zhen, turned to look at him. 'So this is the punk who embarrassed both my grandsons in front of the entire spirit Master community?'
Fury surged in his chest—and with it, a powerful spirit Douluo-level pressure surged toward Li Chang'an.
"Watch yourself!"
Ghost Douluo immediately stepped in front of Li Chang'an, eyes cold and sharp.
"You dare attack the Pope's personal disciple? Try me, old man. You'll never walk out of this palace."
"I only meant to ask: is this how Spirit Hall treats its allies? Are we allies—or are we slaves to be humiliated at will?"
Huyan Zhen retracted his pressure and sat back down, his voice calm.
"May I ask the clan Master three questions?"
The voice was young, but clear and unwavering. It was Li Chang'an speaking.
He didn't wait for an answer and went straight in:
"First: Is it fair for a spirit Master to bully someone weaker than them?"
"Uhh…"
Huyan Zhen was caught off guard.
"Second: Should such a bully be pitied?"
Again, Li Chang'an took a bold step forward, his gaze stern and unwavering.
"This… I…"
"And third: Just now, you tried to attack me. Was it because you look down on me? Because I'm young? Because I'm the Pope's disciple? Or because you look down on the Pope herself? Are you declaring war on Spirit Hall!?"
Li Chang'an finished with a flourish, then turned to Ghost Douluo and declared:
"Uncle Ghost, he disrespects Spirit Hall. The fight has already begun!"
"Ah… this… this…"
Huyan Zhen was speechless.
_____
T/N:
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