Half an hour after securing Helios Station, I knelt in silence, enduring Brigadier Verwin's reprimand.
"I gave you an explicit order to stop, and you ignored me!" she barked, her voice laced with frustration. "You ignored me when I asked if you were alright! And instead, what do you do? You—" she jabbed a finger at me, "—broke the station floor just to chase after him! Do you have any idea how much that's going to cost to repair?! Do you?!"
There was plenty I wanted to say. How if she hadn't interfered, I would've caught Filch Alsier. How I had done everything right, only for her meddling to ruin it all at the end.
But if I said any of that now, I'd get more than just an earful.
Traveler once told me that superiors hate it when their juniors tell them something is their fault. So, I kept my mouth shut. At least until I could prove it was Verwin's fault.
"Oh, and let's not forget the other floors you wrecked!" Verwin continued, growing more agitated. "Bullet holes! Shrapnel explosions! Scenes straight out of an acne-ridden face! You—are you even listening to me, brat?!"
I exhaled slowly, looking away. "I'm listening. I'd just rather hear the wind screaming instead."
"You—" Verwin lifted a hand, her eyes flashing with fury.
I shut my eyes, bracing for the impact.
"Calm down, Verwin."
General Fenrir's voice cut through the air, halting her just short of striking me.
"Tch." Verwin pulled back, stuffing her hands behind her back.
"If I'm not mistaken," Fenrir continued, his tone steady, "Second Lieutenant Firefly also told you to stay away from her opponent. Did she not?"
"W-well, yeah," Verwin admitted, shifting uneasily. "But I'm her superior! She can't tell me what to do!"
Fenrir gave her an unimpressed look before turning his attention to me. "Second Lieutenant, if you were aware of the enemy CK's ability to copy Knight functions, why didn't you report it?"
I answered smoothly, keeping my voice level. "The radio with a direct connection to the warship was taken by Captain Trey. We were in a rush at the time, so Andromeda and I couldn't communicate the enemy's abilities until we engaged them and confirmed they were a Constellation Knight. For safety, Captain Trey fled the communication centre with the prince to avoid my engagements with the enemy."
Fenrir studied me, his expression unreadable. Weighing whether I was lying. Then he went for the surest verification. "CK unit," he addressed Andromeda. "Is your pilot telling the truth?"
[Affirmative, General Fenrir.] Andromeda's voice rang clear. [A hostile Knight was rapidly approaching the communications room. Before I could bypass Freihat's failsafe's, Firefly was forced to distract the Knight with her bare body for 25.8 seconds. Prior to the attack, I downloaded the warship's contact frequency onto Captain Trey's radio. I did not have enough time to link myself directly, as additional failsafe's were still preventing outward communications. As a result, only that one radio could reach you.]
"Hm." Fenrir scratched his beard, considering the response. Then, pulling a cigarette from his coat, he relaxed his posture. "Alright," he said at last. "Looks like the blame falls on you, Brigadier Verwin, for rushing in headfirst."
Verwin's face twisted in disbelief. "Wha—General!"
"Quiet." Fenrir lit his cigarette, exhaling a long trail of smoke before levelling a glare at both of us. "Verwin will be punished for letting the main perpetrator escape. Firefly will be penalized for the unnecessary damage done to Helios Station. No objections."
It wasn't fair. But it was probably the best outcome I could get.
"Yes, sir."
Verwin and I spoke in unison before heading off.
Then, I found a dark corner near the tanks that had crushed me earlier and let my body drop to the floor. My back hit the cold metal as I slumped against the tank's treads, staring at nothing. And my gaze fell on something small, white, and out of place.
The card Filch Alsier had dropped before vanishing. I reached for it, fingers closing around the smooth surface. 'Limbo.' I read on it, with that mix of a snake with a lions mane pictured on it.
I stared at the word, then slid the card into my jacket pocket, feeling the weight of my failure settle in again.
Everything had been going so well. And then, at the very end—spoiled.
Sighing, I muttered aloud, "Andy, do you think I could've still captured Filch?"
[Negative.] Andromeda's answer was immediate, unyielding. [With the speed Pavo copied from Lepus, there was no chance of apprehending him. It was a stroke of luck you managed to determine his location in the end.]
That answer should have been comforting. Instead, I asked, "Do you think me being punished is fair?"
Andromeda hesitated. That silence was an answer in itself.
He didn't want to outwardly agree with me—but he wasn't disagreeing either.
[You did what you thought was necessary, Pilot.] His voice was neutral, careful. [Circumstances are difficult to judge from an objective perspective for humans.]
I tipped my head back, knocking it lightly against the tank's tread.
Once.
Twice.
Three times.
Self-loathing clawed at my throat. "That's twice now," I muttered. "Two Constellation Knights. Two fights. Two losses. I feel like I'm back at the training facility. Like I haven't improved at all. I thought I was getting better—but I guess..." My fingers curled into my sleeves. "...I'm still just a failure, aren't I, Andy?"
Andromeda remained silent. I wanted him to contradict me—to say something, anything, that might dull the raw edge of my thoughts—but no words of solace came. Curling in on myself, arms wrapped around my knees, I let the tears fall. Just like I used to at the facility. Just like I had before sleep claimed me on countless nights.
"Has anyone seen Pilot Firefly?"
"Pilot Firefly's missing."
"Where could she have gone?"
Time blurred. Hours passed, marked only by the distant echo of voices searching for me. But I stayed curled in the shadows beneath the towering bulk of the three tanks, unmoving. Sobbing, then going quiet, then sobbing again—until there were no more tears left to shed, only the dull ache they had left behind.
"Ahh~." A sigh, followed by the weight of someone settling beside me. I ignored them. Their presence was strong, gaze pressing against my back like a palpable force, but I didn't care.
"...You don't take failure well, do you?"
I recognized the voice. Evan.
"The prince is wondering where you went," he continued, as though I might answer. "Says he won't leave until he sees you, so everyone's scrambling to find you."
I didn't respond.
"Huh... well, the hostages are all being taken care of," he remarked, his tone edged with exhaustion. "They had a lot to say about your methods in rescuing them, so your punishment might get worse." A pause. "As for me? I sang you sweet praises all the way beyond the horizon. Not that it'll do much good, considering it's coming from a member of the most despised battalion."
Still nothing from me.
Evan shifted, rubbing at his neck, fidgeting like he wasn't used to dealing with... this. Eventually, he mumbled, "Everybody has low points, I think. We all have ways to get through it, and... well, no one stays where they were. You know?"
I wasn't really listening. His words blurred into background noise as my mind was pulled somewhere else—back to a sweltering afternoon at Fallen Moon Facility.
"Traveler, what does a person do if they aren't seeing any improvement?"
Fanning himself lazily with a massive leaf he had procured from somewhere, Traveler responded, "Who knows? Depends on what's ahead of them. Is it potential, or a wall they're facing?" He paused, then added, "If it's me we're talking about... I'd just get up and keep walking. No other option's ever been available to me." He peered at me then. "But what brought this on?"
"Oh, umm... back before we met, before I took the stimulants—I was always dead last. Failing the most."* I hesitated, then shrugged. *"I just wanted to hear what you'd think of it. It's nothing important."
Before I could retreat, Traveler asked, "Then why did you keep getting back up?"
I froze.
"If you knew you were going to fail the same way the next day," he pressed, "why get up from the floor at all?"
I clenched my fists. "...I didn't want to die. I wanted to live. That's all. I didn't want to be scrapped for parts like my sisters always said I would be." I hesitated. "But... that's not really what I meant when I asked you."
"You meant touching your limit." Traveler grinned behind the strange glitching static that always concealed his face. "It's something everyone experiences once or twice in life," he said. "Punch it. Your effort won't leave any mark, but keep punching the wall until suddenly—" He snapped his fingers. "—the wall falls down. You won't know why or how. There won't even be a sign beforehand. But one day, you'll realize that it crumbled under your conviction. You'll face that moment someday—so remember this. All i ask from you, as my student, is to keep going forward even when you feel like you're going nowhere."
I came back to myself slowly. My fingers were curled against the cold metal floor, damp with my own tears. I could still hear Evan, his voice trailing off in some ridiculous ramble.
"And then you'll be like—woah! This banana was mine all along, and—huh?"
I moved. Rising from the ground, I walked straight past Evan and the others—people I hadn't even realized were standing there, watching, whispering.
I tilted my head back, drawing in a breath, staring at the ceiling above. And then—before I even realized it—laughter bubbled up. "Hehe... hahaha!"
Evan looked completely lost. "What the hell did she take from all that to make her laugh?"
Ignoring him, I wiped the lingering tears from my face and turned with a renewed sense of clarity. "I guess I found my wall, Traveler." My smile deepened, a quiet determination settling in my chest. "I'll keep punching it until I get past it somehow." I turned to Evan. "Thank you," I said simply. "For at least trying to console me."
"Uh... sure," he muttered, still confused.
I walked past the others, asking where the prince was, and soon found myself in Hangar 2.
"Ah! Firefly!" The moment he spotted me, the prince broke into a run, slipping free from his escorts. He grabbed my wrist with both hands, his face alight with excitement. "Come with me! The palace is big and full of so much good food! I'll give you everything you want if you stay with me!"
Gently, I peeled his hands from my wrist and crouched, holding them in mine. He was clean now—his blonde hair full of volume, his face no longer smeared with dirt and fear.
"I'm afraid I can't," I said softly. "There's still a lot of work to do."
His smile vanished. "Oh..."
"I'll come visit you when I can," I promised. "Once the work is done. How does that sound?"
"You... promise?" His voice wavered, tears threatening again.
"Cross my hearts." I giggled slightly, recalling the few times Traveler had said that to me. "Go now. I'm sure the Empress wants to see you safe."
He nodded, stepping back onto the ship. But just before he disappeared inside, he turned and shouted across the hangar— "When all the work is done! When you can stay with me—marry me!"
I blinked. '...What?' I tilted my head, but seeing how flustered he looked, I simply smiled and waved, watching as he hurried onto the ship.
A voice cut through the moment. "Fucking artificial." I glanced at one of the prince's new escorts. He sneered at me. "If you know what's good for you, forget what the prince just said." Then he turned, following his charge aboard.
The ship lifted off moments later, vanishing into the void beyond the hangar doors. I stood there for a while, watching the stars, lost in thought. "...Andy," I murmured after a moment, "what does 'marry' mean?"
[The union between a man and a woman in a partnership through a ceremony. You should ask a human about this, as my understanding is limited.]
So there was more to it than that, then. Interesting.
[More importantly, Pilot—I am glad you are alright. Apologies for my inability to support you earlier.]
I smiled faintly. "It's fine. We both seem to have a wall we're struggling to get through, apparently." Turning, I wandered through Helios Station, now free to move without the constant threat of death hanging over me.
[Your absence has been noted by many personnel, Firefly. General Fenrir has attempted to contact you multiple times, but I blocked him each time.]
"Oh..." I scratched my cheek, feeling a little guilty. "Uh, tell me when he's nearby so I can hide again, okay?"
[As you wish, Pilot.] There was a brief pause. [General Fenrir is currently rapidly encroaching on your position.]
My eyes widened. "Ah—shit!" Without hesitation, I bolted for the stairs, laughing breathlessly as I went. "Thank you, Andy! Hahaha!"