Watching Vegeta look so perturbed and then storm out of the room like that ate away at Goku's subconscious thoughts. She couldn't allow herself to be mad at Vegeta for his reaction. After all, he seemed to be going through some odd phase where he actually wanted her. She assumed automatically that it was a lustful conquest sort of deal. She knew that was enough to make the average person angry, but somehow, she just couldn't find it in herself to be mad at the arrogant Prince.
Vegeta… she murmured softly. 'Why are you always so upset? You are so aggravating at times, but I know you must act that way because you're hurting inside. I must have somehow been the cause of it this time… I don't want to hurt you…
ChiChi could not ignore the look that Goku had sent Vegeta's way. It was a troubled, confused, and worried look. It scared her. She was an intuitive person. She knew what that particular look spelled out. She could tell that Goku was beginning to actually care for Vegeta, but was it in a romantic way, or was it merely a slowly forming bond of friendship?
Oh, Goku… I wish you could see how much I still love you, ChiChi thought, thoroughly discouraged.
Without warning, Goku began to briskly walk toward the direction Vegeta had just taken. Vegeta, it doesn't have to be this way! You don't have to live your life like this! You can be happy! I'll show you that you can! Goku thought with the utmost of determination.
Just as Goku was about to depart the room, ChiChi at long last found her voice, "Goku!" she exclaimed.
Goku turned her head to glance at ChiChi. She looked bemused as if she were silently asking, "Why do you want to pay any attention to me now? You said that you wanted nothing to do with me anymore! You got your wish, so why all this attention?"
ChiChi appeared dispirited all of a sudden. Perhaps it was Goku's look that did this to her. "I know what I've done," she said quietly, too quietly. "But I really need to talk to you right now, Goku."
Goku looked like an animal trapped in a cage. She appeared restless. Vegeta needs me right now! she thought frantically. I'm his friend, perhaps the only person who considers him a friend… he needs me!
"Chi– " Goku muttered.
"Goku, please!" ChiChi replied, her voice cracking. She looked as if she were about to cry.
"ChiChi, it'll have to wait. I have something really important I need to do. I'll talk to you later," Goku spoke in a rushed manner.
"Okay," replied ChiChi, gazing after her former husband with a thoroughly distraught expression upon her face. Have I lost him for good? she thought, tears sliding down her cheeks and dripping to the floor.
Goku need not sense for Vegeta's ki. By now, she knew all too well where Vegeta went when he wanted to let off some steam. As she approached the entrance to the gravity room chamber, she suddenly began to feel a clammy sensation. The palms of her hands were moist. Her stomach felt like it was making back-flips. Oh great, Goku, she chided herself inwardly, Now is not the time to be getting sick!
She turned the knob to the gravity room door slower than necessary. She couldn't seem to shake off the sudden feeling of apprehensiveness that she felt. Her whole body was on the alert. Her sharp ears caught every squeal of the door, every creak of the floorboards. She entered the gravity room, her heart palpitating in trepidation. Why were her nerves choosing to go haywire now of all times?
Vegeta had sensed Goku's approach, but he chose to stand facing the opposite direction when she entered the room. He was punching and kicking in the air. The gravity controls were already at 100 times Earth's natural gravity. He was angrier than she'd initially thought!
Maybe this wasn't such a great idea, Goku thought nervously.
When Vegeta finally chose to speak, his voice sounded like venom. "What do you want?"
"I-I was just thinking…" began Goku, twiddling her thumbs anxiously, "… I was thinking of how upset you are all of the time. You really don't seem like a happy person."
Vegeta whipped around in an instant and scowled deeply at Goku. "Ya' got a problem with that, Kakarrot?"
Goku frowned slightly, but otherwise, chose to ignore Vegeta's vicious reply. "I was thinking that maybe I can understand where you're coming from. I know you've had a less than glamorous life— "
"That's an understatement if I've ever heard one," replied Vegeta in a somewhat sarcastic tone of voice.
"You've had a really misfortunate life," Goku amended with a small smile, hoping to make Vegeta feel a little better. "I know you've never really had anyone who loves you or even cares about you as a friend would. Vegeta, I think that if you allowed yourself to make a friend then you'd start to become a little happier."
Vegeta raised an eyebrow. "And what exactly is that supposed to mean, pray tell?"
"I guess what I'm trying to say…" Goku paused awkwardly, shuffling her feet around on the tile flooring, "… well, I…"
"Out with it already! I don't have all day long!" hissed Vegeta.
"Well, I just wanted you to know that I'll be your friend, Vegeta," replied Goku, staring him straight in the eyes and smiling a genuinely kind smile.
Vegeta stared blankly at Goku for a split-second. He looked absolutely thunder-struck. When he finally recovered from the initial shock, his face twisted into an ugly and contorted look of disgust.
Vegeta clenched his fists angrily. "First of all," he began, noticeably restraining the rage in his voice, "I am not upset all of the time because I'm lonely or sad or I don't have a friend. This is just how I am. This attitude is who I am. So second of all, you can deduce from that information that I'm in no need of a friend. Thirdly, if I were ever brought down to such a needy level, I would never befriend the likes of you! Kakarrot, you are nothing but the dirt on my shoes! Never delude yourself into thinking that you're anything else to me!"
Goku had opened her mouth to reply to Vegeta, but she only managed to hold her mouth agape with her lips quivering. What Vegeta had just said hit a soft spot, and it did a lot of damage, more so than she was aware it could. Her brows knitted together in misunderstanding.
"Vegeta, I've thought of you as a friend for a while," she muttered under her breath.
"I don't befriend weak half-wits like you!" Vegeta spat.
The word weak and the tone in which Vegeta implied it caused Goku's entire body to shudder. She couldn't stop the feeling of self-consciousness that overcame her. Before the wish, she'd been so sure of herself. She knew who she was, and she had known unfalteringly that she was a strong person. Now, things were different. She wasn't sure of anything anymore. She wasn't sure if she was strong anymore. Vegeta could be right, and the thought of it brought about the worst feeling Goku had ever felt in her life. What was she if she wasn't strong?
I'm not the best father in the world, and now that I'm a woman, that makes things even worse! I failed at being the husband ChiChi needed me to be. I'm not smart. Fighting, being there for my friends and family, being strong is my only use. What am I if I'm weak? I'm nothing; I'm useless! Goku mused.
Goku gritted her teeth and clenched her small fists at her sides, painfully aware of how unintimidating she must look to Vegeta. No! I am strong! It isn't true! she thought, her body trembling with anger. I won't let you get to me, Vegeta!
Vegeta suddenly became aware of the mental state Goku was in. He silently wondered how she'd become so enraged all of a sudden. She was grinding her teeth together now. She looked as if she were about to scream at him or pounce on him. She was definitely not thinking happy thoughts.
Vegeta smirked triumphantly. "What's the matter, Kakarrot? Did I hurt your girlish feelings?" he asked sardonically. "You know, you really shouldn't scowl at me like that. It's marring your pretty face."
Goku shut her eyes for a moment, her expression morphing into impassivity. She took a long, deep breath. She crossed her arms and reopened her eyes. She caught Vegeta off-guard by immediately flashing him a sickeningly sweet smile.
She laughed to herself liltingly and replied in a confident tone of voice, "Alright Vegeta, you just keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel more secure, but my ears are deaf to your juvenile insults."
Since when did Kakarrot learn to make comebacks? Vegeta dropped his smirk and sneered at her contemptuously, "Stop fabricating ideas about me, Kakarrot! I am not sad, lonely, or insecure!"
"Fine, Vegeta, whatever you say," Goku replied with a dismissive wave of her hand.
"Yes, now leave me alone!"
Goku smiled. "I'll leave you alone if you answer a question, just one question."
"Make it quick!"
"Well, I was just wondering, do you ever see yourself settling down and having a family here?" Goku asked.
Vegeta visibly recoiled with shock, "N-no!" he sputtered out without thinking it through. "I mean, isn't it obvious? I would never stoop myself as low as to mating with a worthless Earthling!"
"Don't throw a tizzy or anything, you've made it clear that you don't want any friends, but don't you want someone to love? Don't you want to obtain a partner to spend the rest of your life with?" questioned Goku.
Vegeta frowned slightly. He suddenly felt extremely ill at ease. "Well, to mate with a human wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for having to…"
"Having to what?" asked Goku.
"… having to be careful with them. I would never be content sexually. I don't want to feel like I'm having sex with a porcelain doll," Vegeta explained, his face turning red out of embarrassment.
"Oh, it's not so bad, Vegeta! I totally get where you're coming from, but once you get used to it, it isn't so bad. I think you should see for yourself though!" replied Goku, completely at ease.
"No, Kakarrot, if I can't have a Saiyan woman, nothing else will suffice," Vegeta replied curtly.
Goku frowned, "But then you'll have to be alone your entire life! We're the only two Saiyans left."
Vegeta's expression turned even more morbid than ever. "Get out of here, Kakarrot," he spoke sharply.
"Why?"
"I've given you your answer! Now leave!" Vegeta nearly yelled.
Goku suddenly felt the need to rebel against Vegeta. "Make me!" she countered.
Vegeta was taken aback by such behavior coming from Goku of all people. Vegeta crossed his arms in annoyance. Kami, Kakarrot is becoming more and more like a woman every day! he thought. 'I think some of ChiChi's spunk has rubbed off on her as well.
"Well, Vegeta, what are you going to do about it?" Goku challenged, already preparing to give herself a congratulatory pat on the back for acquiring a well-deserved victory.
Vegeta's former annoyed expression morphed into a look of amusement. "If there's anything that I've learned from this mudball of a planet, it's that it is disrespectful to hit a female. They're so fragile and defenseless that it would be shameful to try and pick a fight with them. Tell me, Kakarrot, why should I bend the rules for you? You're no different than the rest of them."
"Vegeta, you know perfectly well that I'm not really a girl! Even so, girls aren't weak anyway! That's just a stereotype!" Goku defended.
"I beg to differ," replied Vegeta offhandedly, whilst making a point of looking Goku up and down and commenting, "But you're right about one thing, you aren't a girl, you're a woman."
Goku's face flushed, "Y-You're impossible!" she exclaimed.
Vegeta couldn't help but chuckle at hearing this statement, "See, you even act like a woman. Bulma says the same thing all of the time."
If glares could kill, Vegeta would have been worm food 10 feet under by now. Now he'd done it! He'd really insulted Goku this time! At this point, he should have been taking Goku seriously. She was really pissed! But, being the grade-A jackass that Vegeta naturally is, he felt this was a smashing opportunity to begin a fit of laughter.
"Stop laughing at me, Vegeta! It isn't funny at all!" Goku spoke, unable to control the rising pitch in her voice.
Vegeta continued to laugh, the blood rushing to his face. He managed to stifle his laughter for a moment so that he could demand mockingly, "Make me!"
An angry guttural sound escaped Goku's parted lips. "Stop making fun of me, Vegeta!" she yelled. "How would you like it if you got stuck in the predicament I'm in?"
Vegeta hooted, crouching down and grabbing at his aching stomach, "Stop it, Kakarrot, ha-ha, you win!"
"Maybe I won't wish myself back to normal when the Dragonballs restore themselves. Maybe I'll wish for you to be made into a woman! Maybe then I'll be able to understand what's so Kami-damn funny!" With this stated, Goku swiftly retreated from the room, purposely slamming the door behind her.
When Vegeta finally calmed down, he sat on the floor and reflected on what had just happened. He wasn't at all concerned that he'd hurt Goku's feelings. After all, he'd needed to let out his pent up frustrations on someone, and naturally since she was the cause of it, it felt so much better when he unloaded it on her. Besides, he thought, she'll be over it in 15 minutes anyway.
Vegeta stared off into space for a while. I haven't laughed like that in a long time… he mused. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever had a good laugh like that.
Vegeta couldn't deny it; there was something special about this "changed" Goku that made him actually feel sort of good. He really enjoyed making her angry. He liked having the power to do that. The male Goku was so relaxed all of the time; you'd have to kill his best friend to get him to hate you. In Freeza's case, even then Goku was willing to give him a second chance! He was willing to forgive him!
Vegeta frowned. There's a fine line between leniency and stupidity that the male Kakarrot couldn't understand. But Kakarrot is different now. She has a temper now. Even Kakarrot isn't immune to female Saiyan emotions. I'd be willing to bet, that if she had to make the decision to kill Freeza, she would have done it in a heartbeat.
She has so many different qualities than him, though at the same time, she's still so similar to him. Somehow, despite that, I'm attracted to her. Vegeta furrowed his eyebrows together in frustration, If I don't break this, and soon, it's going to pose a serious problem for me! How can she just stand there and obliviously suggest that I mate a human? Human females can be attractive, but to me, they don't hold a candle to any Saiyan female! As if that's not enough, Kakarrot just so happens to be a painfully attractive Saiyan female! It's as if Kami is playing a joke on me!'
I try to ignore her, but everywhere I go, I see her! It's like she's teasing me! I should be happy. I got what I wished for. Kakarrot is weaker than I am. That's all that I really needed. Though, why isn't that enough anymore? That should be all that I need! I've regained my honor as the strongest Saiyan. I've achieved my birthright. I've become a Super Saiyan. For years, I've dreamt of being the strongest. Why isn't that enough? Becoming the strongest was my only
purpose in life! Now that I have attained it, why do I yearn for more? Why must I have her as well?