"Roots grow strongest in quiet gardens."
— Sayings of the Hearth-Faith
I woke up in a sweat, heart pounding out of my chest, with a sense of nausea as my vision spun. I don't know how long it has been since I fell asleep, but I can vaguely make out Johanna and Gertherd's chatter. It's difficult to hear properly with all the blood thumping around my ears, but it sounds like they're planning out my weekend with them. I think they want to see if I'm interested in their trades, so I guess I'll be following them around work for the next few days.
I close my eyes and try to drift back to sleep, praying to whatever Gods there may be that I don't have that nightmare again. The pain. It hadn't even been 24 hours since I felt that burning sensation throughout my entire body - a torturous feeling of each cell in the body bursting and simultaneously being segmented into wafer-thin slices to maximise suffering.
I don't want to think about it any further. If I'm meant to be a four-year-old, why aren't I dreaming of fun things. What's this world's equivalent to the Teletubbies? I should be dreaming of that. Not having nightmares of that. Or, at least let me dream of life back home, back on Earth. Alternatively, please let me wake up back on Earth, back as me, and not in the body of a child.
***
I wriggle and writhe in my bed, unable to fall asleep. All that sweating made my bed uncomfortable, and I was really thirsty, so I decided to head to the kitchen.
I had to jump to grab onto the door handle. I, a grown man, had to jump to reach a door handle. I mean, really, whose idea was it to put a twenty-year-old man into the body of a child. It's so insulting. When I find whoever did that to me they're going to get it for sure.
Unfortunately for me, the thump from me landing back on the floor was enough to alert my parents that I was still awake. By the time I had fully opened the door, I was greeted by two giant-like figures: Johanna and Gertherd.
"Oh, Rich, it's long past your bedtime? Why are you awake?" asked Johanna, crouching down to my eye level. She looks at me with concern in her eyes - she looks at me as though I'm her precious son. I can't maintain eye contact with that.
"I, uhh, can I have some water?"
"Of course, Richie!" She embraces me and kisses me on my cheek. Lady, I wanted moisture in me, not on me. "It's a bit late to go to the well, but let's go to the greenhouse - I always keep some water there."
Johanna lifts me into her arms and starts walking to the back of the house. Her husband follows, giving me a smile when I meet his eyes. I look away. He's hurt by that. I'm not his son anyway, I'm sure he'd do the same in my position.
"Hey, Rich, you never really told me how daycare was? Did you have fun? Did you make any friends?" Johanna bombards me with questions, preventing me from dissociating.
"I think it was fun. I didn't know anyone there, but this boy called Theo came up to me. He taught me how to play Cultivators and Monsters! I played as a monster at first, but I kept on tripping when I tried to chase the cultivators. The teacher was also quite nice. He didn't do much but he made sure I was safe every time I fell over. I even started falling over on purpose just to see his reaction. It was really funny!" I babble and yap, imitating a child to the best of my ability.
Retrospectively, daycare was genuinely quite fun for me. Maybe I'm turning into a child? Good god that'd be terrifying. Imagine slowly losing your mental capabilities and regressing back some sixteen years... sounds like some sort of disease. Either way, I play my role rather convincingly, to which Johanna and Gertherd smile.
"Oh yes, Theo. His parents regularly come to buy our herbs, so we know them quite well. If you want, we can invite him over and you two can play together again."
"No, it's okay!"
"Did you make any other friends at daycare?"
"..."
"Alright, here we are. Here's your water, Sir Richard," says Gertherd, kneeling down in front of me, holding a clay cup half empty of water.
Did that somewhat scary-looking man make a... joke? Johanna starts giggling, accidentally shaking me with each laugh, as I try to reach towards the cup to grab it. She slaps her husband on the shoulder, who also starts laughing rather heartily. Finally, I chug down all that refreshing water, almost choking on it before I start laughing too.
It's a shame I'm not part of this family.
***
I woke up in the morning to nature's alarm - the crowing of roosters. I guess this village has a farm somewhere near me. Johanna came into my room to wake me up, but I had already stood up and was staring out the window, bathing my skin in the warmth of the sun.
"Richie! It's time for breakfast."
The food here was exactly like back on earth. It was definitely comforting to have regular food considering my circumstances. We had eggs, some toast (unsliced if you really want to know), and I drank a glass of extremely creamy milk. It was heaven.
"So, Rich, your father and I were thinking it'd be great for you to join us at work. Daycare's not open on the weekend, and, as sensible as you are, we can't be leaving you at home by yourself. Today we're going to go to my herb garden, and maybe I'll take you to the shop as well. You can be my little mascot for the day."
Since I was currently a child, I couldn't refuse orders. And, besides, it seemed interesting - what sort of herbs is she growing? Maybe some that would be beneficial for cultivation... should I sneakily grab some without her noticing? No, no good will come of that, and, besides, what if they're toxic to small children like me?
***
I had told Johanna that I'd prefer to walk than be carried everywhere by her, but she insisted on having her way. Turns out, Johanna worked quite a few miles away, and my little legs wouldn't be able to handle that. That, and the fact that she's a body cultivator who runs at inhumane speeds.
My hair kept getting in my face and dust kept on getting in my eyes. Whenever I protested, she'd run faster and faster, laughing to herself. How did I end up with a sadist for a mother? By the time we arrived at the herb garden, I felt as though I had aged by at least ten years, whilst Johanna looked completely fine. Typical cultivator, not sparing a single thought about a mortal like me.
"Garden" was definitely an understatement. Was my family extremely wealthy, or was land just extremely cheap here? Perhaps my sense of scale was warped since I had the perspective of a kid, but either way... damn. And the smell as well, there were at least eleven herbs and spices in my nose as soon as I got there. I guess the food in this world won't be bland! Honestly, I was kind of worried about that. This world looks a lot like medieval Europe, and I hear the food back then was bland since salt was expensive.
"Mum, what's that plant called? And this one and this one and this one." I play into my inner child, but I genuinely am curious. Mother, I mean, Johanna, sees this excitement and grins. She crouches down to my eye level and starts explaining each one to me, and even lets me pick some of them under supervision.
"This is called a Goldentuft Mossleaf. It tastes somewhat nutty and buttery so we use it in stews, but it's very strong so we take it out of the stew after cooking. If you accidentally bite into one it's very yucky. And this one - this is Starblossom Thyme. You've drank it in tea before and we used to grow it throughout my pregnancy. They say that 'no child falls ill under a roof where Starblossom grows' but we ended up with so much Starblossom overgrowth that the house looked abandoned. Your father spent an entire week cutting it out of the house."
She was clearly very eager to tell me all about her plants, giving a story behind each one. To me, who came from a bustling city where the colour green seemed to be endangered, it was certainly refreshing to see this and hear all about her passion for plants.
"But mum, why don't you grow spiritual herbs?"
"Well, who would be buying them? There aren't many cultivators in the village, and they take forever to grow. They don't taste that nice either."
"If there aren't many cultivators here, why do you and dad live here?"
"Your father and I don't really cultivate. We both met at university - I did herbology, and he was a cultivator, but I never really wanted to cultivate. You know, cultivators live for hundreds of years, some even thousands. But I find that there's a sadness in that. I don't want to live for hundreds of years and outlast all of my friends... And your father, well, he just loves me so much. If he cultivates and I don't, then he'll also be sad won't he? We just want a happy life in the village."
***
After a shift comprising of attempting to pick herbs with Johanna, clearly slowing down her efficiency, we went back to the village (yes, I was carried again) to open the shop. Soon enough, we had the first customer.
"Welcome, Elisabeth! Are you here for some more Snaproot Chive?"
"You know me too well, Johanna. Oh and who's this, your son?"
"Yes, it's Richard's first day at work. Come on, honey, say hello to Elisabeth. She's your friend's mother isn't she?"
"Oh, you know our Theo? I hope he doesn't bother you too much. He's a real piece of work."
The two women talk amongst themselves as I sit there in silence. Just as she's leaving, Elisabeth turns back to us.
"By the way, Johanna, if you've brought Richard here because daycare's closed for the weekend, how about sending him over to my house tomorrow. I'm sure he and Theo could play with each other."
"I'd love that. Thank you so much"
Well that's that. I guess I'm stuck with that Theo for all of tomorrow.