Sebastian Ashford's POV (Present Day)
I don't remember walking back to the dorms.I don't remember whose blood was on my knuckles—his or mine.
All I remember is her face.That goddamn smile.
Not even a real one. Just a flicker—barely there—but it tore something open inside me. Like watching a match get struck by someone else when I've been shivering in the dark, hands bruised from trying to spark anything between us.
She smiled at him. At Leo-fucking-Summers. A fourth-year idiot with too much hair gel and not enough brain cells. I should've walked away. I should've pretended I didn't see her in that stupid little garden, didn't see her lift her eyes for once—not to flinch, not to cry, but to actually look happy.
But I didn't.I broke.And now?
Now she's gone again.
It's been two days. She hasn't shown up to class. Her name still gets called at roll like a wound being scraped open. I sit there, arms folded, pretending not to care, pretending not to hear the whispers.
"Did you hear? She fainted after what Ashford did.""Someone said she was crying in the girls' bathroom.""She probably dropped out.""Good. Freaks like her don't belong here."
My fingers twitch under the table.
I want to scream. I want to grab them by the throat and make them take it back.But I can't.
Because it's true.I'm the reason she disappeared again.
I don't even know where to look.She's not in the dorm. Not at the cafe. Not in the labs or the library or the back bench she always hides in.
She's nowhere.
And the worst part?
When I closed my eyes last night, I saw her—not the usual image, not her cowering or flinching or ducking her head—but her smiling. That little, rare smile. Soft and slow, like a candle flickering back to life.
But it wasn't for me.It was never for me.
I told myself it didn't matter. I told myself this obsession was under control.
But the way my heart stopped when she disappeared again?
I know now.
It's never been under control.She's under my skin. In my bloodstream. In every breath.
And if she doesn't come back—If she vanishes for good this time—
I think I'll lose my fucking mind.