I was lying in my crib, meditating on the concept of time. I had overcome the obsession with measuring or fully understanding it, as it seemed a futile exercise in my current situation.
What truly mattered was feeling how my body grew and strengthened each day. As the initial tedium of being a baby faded, I began to adapt to this new existence.
That morning, I watched my mother as she prepared to go to the shelter in search of water. Though the dawn offered me a fragile sense of security, I couldn't help but feel a knot in my stomach every time she left. But there were more pressing concerns on my mind.
Nutrition was my greatest worry. Despite my mother's tireless efforts to secure food, my body demanded more to develop properly. I knew that if I wanted to grow stronger, I needed to find additional sources of sustenance, but resources in the sewers were alarmingly scarce.
The nights, with their chaotic anarchy, made foraging for food even more difficult. However, fate seemed to take pity on me when I discovered something promising behind our house: a surprisingly fertile patch of land.
What caught my attention most wasn't the soil itself, but its inhabitants: thick, writhing worms the size of a thumb. My knowledge from another life allowed me to instantly recognize their valuable nutritional contribution: rich in proteins, carbohydrates, and essential minerals. They could be the key to the development I so desperately needed.
Despite my frustration at not being able to walk yet, I couldn't help but smile at the thought of the day when I would have full control of my limbs. In the meantime, my mind planned how to make use of this invaluable resource.
My body gradually adapted to this new state. The first time I managed to crawl, I felt indescribable joy, and my mother's exuberant celebration made that moment even more memorable. Every small achievement was a cause for joy for both of us.
The decisive moment came when I uttered my first word. After weeks of secret practice, I gathered the courage to say:
—…Mama.
For a moment, I hesitated. It was a word I had abandoned in my past life, and I wasn't sure how to feel about reclaiming it. But my mother's radiant smile, shining like a sun in a gray sky, dispelled any discomfort. In that moment, I knew I had made the right choice. Acknowledging her as my mother was the first step toward fully embracing my new life.
Thanks to her constant conversation, I learned to master the language quickly. Meanwhile, I observed with fascination the dynamics of the underground shelter, where people exchanged goods and services through a rudimentary barter system. Each day brought new opportunities to refine my control over this growing body.
My name was Arceus, though my mother affectionately called me "Ars." The name, which at first seemed somewhat naive to me, began to take on special meaning. My features, reflected in the metal sheet we used as a mirror, revealed reddish-golden hair inherited from my mother and intense red eyes, likely a legacy from my father. I couldn't predict how my appearance would change over the years, but as long as I maintained a healthy weight, everything would be fine.
The days passed relentlessly, and my appetite seemed insatiable. My small stomach devoured everything I ate and, almost instantly, demanded more.
One morning, I woke up with a ravenous hunger. My mother didn't take long to come to my side, as always, with a look of infinite tenderness.
—Are you very hungry, my little one? —she asked sweetly as she lifted me into her arms.
With gestures now familiar, she prepared to feed me. I leaned back on the white blanket and began to nurse eagerly. The warm, comforting taste filled me with satisfaction, and my feet moved instinctively with pleasure.
My mother, an expert at interpreting every one of my gestures, smiled as she noticed my contentment. With a playful caress, she tickled my feet, eliciting a spontaneous laugh. Within minutes, my small stomach was satisfied. Her tender embrace and gentle pats on the back enveloped me in a sense of peace and warmth.
I rested my cheek on her shoulder and closed my eyes, feeling completely safe in her arms.
—My little one, you're not eating too much, are you? —she teased with a melodic laugh.
Her comment struck me as so amusing that I couldn't help but join her laughter with a genuine infantile gurgle.
While I savored these intimate moments with my mother, my mind drifted into deeper reflections. I thought about my previous life, an existence that now seemed blurry and distant, about my death and that nebulous limbo I couldn't escape.
At the beginning of this new life, I suspected it might be some form of divine punishment. However, I soon realized I was mistaken.
Despite not fully understanding my situation—where I was, why I was here, who had brought me—I felt profound gratitude.
This wasn't a punishment, but an incomprehensible and marvelous act of grace. For some reason I couldn't fathom, I had been given back what I had so carelessly squandered in my previous life.
Without tangible proof to back it up, I firmly believed this was a precious gift. My former name had faded into oblivion, but now I had a new one, Arceus, and with it, the opportunity for a fresh start, free from the weight of my past, my mistakes, and my guilt.
This small body, which at first felt foreign and strange, now seemed to fit perfectly, as if it had always been meant to be mine. The feeling was so overwhelming that I couldn't contain my emotions.
—Ah… Ah…
I tried to articulate something, anything, as tears began to well up. I didn't mind crying; I forced my immature vocal cords to produce some sound that could express the intensity of what I felt.
In that moment, I made a solemn promise to myself: this time, I would do things right. As my mother rocked me in her arms, my determination burned fiercely.
Though many things still didn't make sense—why I had been born here, what my purpose was in this new world—I knew I would have plenty of time to figure it all out.
I was done with stagnating, with yielding to adversity, with giving up. I didn't care if I failed or stumbled along the way. I didn't care how many obstacles I had to face.
This time…
This time would be different. I would live fully, making the most of every moment in this world!
I expressed my resolve with the only means available to me: a cry that only a baby could produce, a mix of joy, determination, and a touch of fear of the unknown.
Adelaide, sensing the intensity of my emotions though not understanding their true nature, held me tighter against her chest, whispering words of comfort and love.
—It's okay, my love. —She murmured as she gently stroked my back—. Mommy's here. I'll always be here for you.
I clung to her, letting my tears flow freely. In that embrace, I felt all the fears and doubts I had accumulated since my rebirth gradually dissolve.
As I calmed down, I began to perceive my surroundings with greater clarity. The colors seemed more vivid, the sounds sharper, and every detail of the world around me took on deeper meaning.
While Adelaide rocked me gently, humming a lullaby I already recognized as my favorite, I felt a wave of peace wash over me completely.
My eyelids grew heavy, and though I fought to keep my eyes open, not wanting to miss a single second of this new reality, sleep was relentless.
Before succumbing entirely to drowsiness, I had one final conscious thought: "Thank you."
I didn't know exactly to whom or what my gratitude was directed.
Perhaps to the universe, perhaps to some higher power, or perhaps simply to life itself for this second chance.
With a small smile on my lips, I finally surrendered to sleep, secure in my mother's arms and filled with hope for the future awaiting me.
This time, this time I would do it right.