He pulls her hair with one hand and the other he places in her throat adding some pressure Esmeray gasps as Xerxes pulls her hair, the slight pain mixing with the intense pleasure coursing through her. His hand around her throat adds a thrill of danger, making her feel utterly at his mercy.
"Xerxes," she chokes out, her voice strained. "I'm...I'm going to..."
"Yes," he hisses, his grip tightening slightly. "Come for me, Esmeray. Now."
His words and the pressure on her throat push her over the edge. Esmeray screams his name as she comes undone, her body convulsing with pleasure.
Xerxes follows soon after, burying himself deep inside her as he finds his own release. He collapses on top of her, panting heavily.
"That was..." he starts, but trails off, unable to find the words."That was incredible...Isabella " Esmeray freezes at the name, her heart sinking. Has he-was he thinking of her this whole time. Was he imagining fucking Isabella?
She pulls away from him, wrapping the sheets around herself protectively. "Esmeray," she corrects quietly, hurt evident in her voice. "My name is Esmeray."
Xerxes looks at her, confusion and realization dawning on his face. "Fuck," he mutters, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry, Esmeray. I didn't mean... It just slipped out."
He reaches for her, but she shrinks back, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. "Did you think of her?" she asks softly, her voice trembling. "While we were... Did you imagine it was her?"
"No,"
"....you have been sleeping with her, still haven't you?" She asked hurt in her voice, he sits up covering himself "Esmeray let me explain-"
"No need, I understand. Please leave While I still have my sanity." Her voice softer, almost to warming like a beautiful day before the storm.
Xerxes dresses back up, he isn't planning to leave but to explain. But explain what exactly, that he accidentally mistook her for Lady Isabella? That he has indeed been fucking her this whole time? Is he to explain or better yet confront her of some dumb superstition he was told of?
He reaches out to her but she slaps his hand away "Leave, Your majesty" she didn't call him by his name but by his title. Is she that angry at him?
Knowing he fucked up, he walks out the door. He doesn't leave though, instead he stands outside listening carefully but he hears no sound, no cries, no scream no nothing. Just the quietness of the day.
Eventually he leaves.
Inside the room Esmeray is curled into a ball, no tears, just regrets, stupid meaningless regrets.
She had everything with Zaiden, his love, his time, most importantly his loyalty to her. He would burn the world for her, he would do anything for her yet she threw it away for what she thought, No, she was made to believe was love.
All this time she had kept her distance only to be swept up with his looks, his words. She was made a fool, Lady Isabella probably rants about her affair with the rest of the Lady's. All laughing at her.
'I was so stupid to believe his words..God Esmeray you are so stupid 'she scolds herself.
Esmeray's heart aches with a pain she's never known before. She feels foolish, naive for believing Xerxes' empty promises and sweet words. How could she have been so blind?
She thinks back to her time with Zaiden, remembering the depth of his love, the way he cherished her. He would never betray her like this, never shatter her heart into a million pieces.
A bitter laugh escapes her lips as she realizes the truth she threw away the love of a lifetime for a fleeting moment of passion with a man who doesn't truly love her.
'Stupid, stupid, stupid,' she whispers to herself, pounding her fists against the pillow. 'I deserve this pain for being so foolish.'
She curls up tighter, wrapping her arms around herself as if to hold the shattered pieces together. Tears finally come then, pouring down her face in silent streams.
Outside, Xerxes paces the hallway, his mind racing. He knows he's made a terrible mistake, that he's hurt Esmeray deeply. But pride and stubbornness keep him from going back in there and begging for forgiveness.