"So… the first option," Tanner begins, voice low, eyes fixed on the wall passed Jess. "You keep dressing like this for the rest of our ruling years. Because if the packs find out the truth about us, they'll never accept it. They'll exile us both." He pauses, swallowing hard. "Jess, I love you, but I can't lose my pack. I can't lose my family. Not like this." His voice cracks, strained. "You know what it means to be a wolf without a pack. We're nothing. Rogues don't survive long, and I..." he finally looks up, pained, "I don't want that for either of us."
Tanner's words strike Jess like a physical blow. They hit him with a weight he can barely comprehend, and for a moment, it feels like his chest has been crushed under the pressure.
He can't catch his breath. The idea of living hidden, suffocated, cloaked in secrecy, Jess feels the panic rising, but he can't let it show.
His thoughts race, colliding with each other, scrambling for a way out. A way to fix this. He wants to argue, to plead with Tanner, but the words stick in his throat.
"Please, don't say that, I can't live my whole life pretending to be someone else." Jess thinks, but the words don't come.
He can't even begin to process how real this situation has become. If Tanner is really giving him only two options, both impossible, then what does that mean for them?
Tanner's voice drops to something softer, quieter, but Jess hears the underlying weight_ duty, responsibility, desperation, all tangled together. "The second option," Tanner says, his gaze dropping, guilt clouding his features, "Let me lie to the pack. Let me tell them you... rejected me. I'll say you ran away, disappeared. I'll say you didn't want this, didn't want me, that I forced you into marrying me. And then, I'll marry someone else_ a woman."
Each word feels like a hammer on Jess's heart. Tanner isn't saying this to hurt him, but the intent cuts deeper than any cruel words could.
"But you'll stay here with me," Tanner continues, voice thick with a strange mix of emotion. "I'll be with you every night, every day. I'll give you everything you need. You already have my heart, Jess, and I'll give you everything else. You know... you and I can't have heirs, and when I have kids with her, they will be your kids too."
Jess can tell that Tanner's words aren't meant to convince him, they're meant to soften the blow, to make Jess believe that this, somehow, is a solution.
A future built on lies. A future where Tanner marries someone else, has a family, but keeps Jess hidden in the shadows.
Jess can't process it. He feels paralyzed, his mind spinning out of control. "How could he ask this of me?"
His heart is racing, and the sharp sting of betrayal lances through him. Tanner is the one who claimed to love him, care for him_ yet here he is, asking Jess to be an invisible part of his life.
The thought of living like that feels like suffocation. He had thought that marking him meant something, that there was hope for them beyond the lies. But now… everything has changed.
The second option slides into place, stark and brutal, and Jess is frozen. He can't even look at Tanner. He feels as though the very air around him is pressing in, suffocating him.
"Why would he do this to me?!" Jess wonders, his heart thumping in his chest. "If he loves me, why isn't that enough to keep me at his side? To fight for this?!"
He's overwhelmed, confused. All of this feels wrong, and yet Tanner is pleading with him to accept the unbearable. His stomach churns.
"Jess, please." Tanner calls after him, but Jess doesn't respond. He doesn't even hear the words.
He gets of the bed, already walking away to the bathroom, his legs stiff, as though they don't belong to him.
He feels like a puppet, being moved by strings he can't control. His thoughts are swirling in chaos.
With every step he takes, the weight of Tanner's words presses harder. How could Tanner have planned this from the start? Did he ever really want Jess, or was this always about the desires he had? Was Jess just a pawn in a game that Tanner was too afraid to admit?
His mind won't stop. The nausea hits him suddenly, a deep, gut-wrenching sickness. He doubles over, the world tilting, spinning, as the reality of the situation washes over him. His stomach churns violently as he struggles to remain standing.
He staggers in the bathroom, his body moving mechanically.
He grips the sink, staring at his reflection. He feels lost, as though he's looking at a stranger.
He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, not sure how long he's been there.
Everything is blurry, his mind, his heart, the world around him. What is he supposed to do? Tanner says he loves him, but this… this doesn't feel like love. This feels like a betrayal.
When Jess finally returns to the room, Tanner is gone.
On the bedside table, a packed meal sits untouched. A note beside it, hastily scrawled: "What do you want me to do?!"
Jess stares at the note, the weight of its meaning crashing down on him. It's like Tanner is pleading for an answer he already knows.
But Jess doesn't know what to say. The pain is too raw, the confusion too thick. He's been marked, claimed, and yet, here he is about to be discarded.
And worse still, he doesn't know if Tanner's love was ever real. The uncertainty is suffocating, and Jess feels like he's drowning in it.