Time trailing behind the present, for one to experience the endless eternity of the past.
The laws of physics, for the world to work, not of any reason or purpose.
Life after death, for no "human", evil or good, to experience the nothing of nothingness.
Freedom, for life to leave its self-prescribed boundaries and experience their future.
Paths, for those with freedom to not be lost.
Justice, for morality to have a catalyst in which humanity can abuse.
Identity, for body, mind, and effect to be strung together in a single piece of art.
And finally, sin. No sins are unique, for all possible have been done in the moment of their creation. Humanity is born with sin, just as I would be.
All of these concepts shot into my head along with a constant. The knowledge informed me that every previously listed concept was a "constant" of this world.
How constant was a constant? I wasn't sure.
Szzt!
I wasn't sure about many things. Trapped inside of a prison of beating flesh, my senses have been dulled over time. Or whatever time I believed had passed. I didn't even remember if I had senses to be dulled. Knowledge was seemingly shot into my head everytime I had a question.
Szzst!
There it was again. I had a name now. Nell Moren. Humans use those to identify each other. I didn't know why that mattered. I knew absolutely nothing of where I was. Nothing of who I was. But it was warm.
Szzst!
I'm beginning to get tired of this. If whatever was making me into a person could stop, that would really be appreciated. With every bit of anything I learn, I get colder. I feel like I'm waking up. I really don't want to wake up.
I can hear now. My mind, stimulated by my senses' inception, began racing with empty thoughts. I heard a rip after every small segment of time had passed. I couldn't really tell how long it had been. The nerves in my arms were born, and next was my legs. Then my torso and the rest of my body, until I realized… I was really cold. Something in my chest started beating, the same way the walls around me had always beated. My muscles started twitching and trying to flail aimlessly, but were stopped in place by large blood vessels.
My fist reflexively clutched as a bit of detached flesh sputtered in the palm of my hand. My skin was so soft that the blood burnt me. I felt something for the first time.
Szzt!
It was called pain. I didn't want to feel anymore.
Riip!
The flesh prison ripped again. A bit of clear liquid started pooling near my bleeding and burnt hand.
Riiiip!
I was going to have to prepare myself. I felt it coming.
My perfect eternity was over.
The final crack in the flesh prison happened as I was assaulted with the gift of sight. I opened my eyes and looked at the world I was unwillingly thrown into. Countless bright fractals were strung across the black sky, emitting a brilliant light. My mouth shaped itself unconsciously.
Szzst!
This was called a smile. It made me feel warm. An overwhelming sense of comfort invaded my head. I loved it. The same comfort from inside the heart, but I wasn't inside of it. It was inside of me apparently. I looked down at my body as a couple of tiny dried tissue pieces were jabbed inside as two people laid behind me. They must have been sleeping. Blood was pooling around me, but all I could do at that moment was smile, glaring up at the bright dots in the sky. Did they enjoy being watched? Everybody could see them. I didn't feel great being seen by the people around me, and yet the stars have to deal with it on a much larger scale. My thoughts slowed down as my senses were fading away again. Was I going back to my eternity? My eardrums were shattered by the loudest noise I've ever heard throughout my entire, albeit short, life. An oddly shaped creature was shaking in front of me. I believe they're called humans. I'm a human too!... I think? As a human, I believe I should have to talk to it. But I didn't want to. Unfortunately, they began the conversation without my permission by screaming at me.
"Ah… Ah.. AH! Get him to a hospital! Somebody!"
My body was being carried by multiple people. I began to realize something. Something that I could never truly realize beforehand. Something I never cared to realize. I was alive. I existed at this moment. In this place in this world, I exist for a reason. It had to be for a reason. I couldn't tell if this was a gift or a curse, but I didn't care. I had no reason to care, after all. Not beforehand and not now.
The people around me started to murmur to each other.
"Is he from Cittaglia? I don't sense any magic from him."
"Doesn't matter. We need to get him to the hospital."
"Can the Maylem even pay the bill?"
"Don't say that!"
I was really starting to hate… this. My thoughts finally quieted down along with everything else and I fell back into my state of eternity.
______________________________________________________________________________[1]
My hope of being back to where I was immediately ripped apart by the light flooding into my vision. It burned my eyes. It was…way too bright. My body shot upwards as I sat up in a bed. Light blue walls surrounded me. I was nervous but comfortable. A rather contradictory feeling, was it not? A cold liquid was being pushed into my wrist by a needle and a tube. Footsteps rushed over as a short haired female doctor came up to me.
"Are you feeling better?"
It took me a couple seconds to think, and yet nothing of use shot into my mind like it usually did.
"Better…. Uhhhhh. What's better?"
The doctor had no clue what I was talking about, and to be honest neither did I. She told me to lay back down, so I did. It felt horrible to be ordered around, but for some reason, I felt as if I had no choice.
My thoughts slowly began getting faster and faster until they finally returned back to normal. The doctor told me I had been asleep for 5 days. Previously, I knew a "day" was made up of two halves of a day. I now know that a day is actually made up of twenty four "hours". Throughout the time I was unconscious, more knowledge I never knew before had been injected into me. For one, a god of some sort existed in this world. A creator deity or not, I had no clue. But I knew she was the God of Time. She lived inside of me, but I didn't know how to speak to her. I didn't learn anything else about her. To be honest, I didn't want to. Then, there was another person. Her name was L'eau and was apparently a romantic partner of mine. I knew nothing about her or where she was. My information told me she was my girlfriend and yet I hadn't seen her a single time. Since I was in desperate need of answers, or more specifically a direction, I asked. Or at least tried to, for it was the most effort I could afford to use.
"L-L'eau."
The doctor smiled and laughed a little bit as I spoke.
"No, you're in Jeti silly. Not L'eau."
That wasn't what I was asking, but it was still useful information.
"Where is she… Where is L'eau…?"
The doctors side-eyed each other and told me something that made me doubt everything that I had been told.
"She's… the first ruler has been dead for 2,300 years sweetie. You hit your head pretty hard, didn't you?"
My mind instantly grew tense as I stared dead into her eyes. So many new feelings flooded in at the same time that I couldn't keep up with it. I didn't like these doctors. I… just can't. They're too demeaning.
"Please stop calling me sweetie."
The doctor looked disappointed after I told her this but abided. It made me feel insignificant. I wasn't insignificant.
Over my time asleep, I had learned this was called a hospital. People whose bodies are damaged go here. Thankfully, I wasn't damaged so I didn't need to stay. The only thing that may have been damaged is my head, considering all the missing pieces in the information I got. But that could be sorted out later.
Standing up from the bed, I stumbled over to the door and opened it. A doctor saw me and said something, but I couldn't care less. I started sprinting down the hallway and opening every door I could, looking for the exit. I began to run out of energy and sat on the floor, only for the doctors to chase after me again. After a bit of searching, I finally found a unique room. I went in and locked the door so those people couldn't take me back to the bed. Unfortunately, there were 2 people already there. The first human was sitting on a white chair device with his pants around his ankles. He looked at me, terrified for some reason. The second person was an anomaly. I looked at him and he looked back. He was seemingly trapped behind a piece of glass. I could relate to him in that way. I believe this is called empathy. He had medium length dark brown hair and gold eyes. He was wearing that blue robe the hospital gave me so I knew he was a patient. He seemed to be approximately the age of 17 with a medium sized male body type. I spoke to him to see who he was.
"Hello."
The man mouthed the words that I said back to me without speaking. Out of nowhere the man who was sitting on the chair interrupted me by yelling over to me in an agitated manner.
"The fuck are you doing? That's a mirror dipshit, ever heard of it?"
Mirror? I see. His name was mirror. The man on the chair had no reason to insult me, though.
In truth, I would have liked to put in the effort to free him. I just couldn't feel like I could. It was the most frustrating thing I felt since I was released, so I yelled out to him.
"I'll free you, just stop copying me!"
He then proceeded to do it again, mocking me. Out of anger, I yelled at him and walked away, dragging my feet on the floor behind me. The guy in the glass went the same way as me. After my first ever successful day of communication, I figured it was time to continue trying to escape. I opened the door, waved goodbye to the man on the seat and pushed the doctors out the way who were trying to contain me. The blood from the needle hole in my arm mixed with the time I spent as they both trailed behind me. Walking down the hallway again, I finally found the exit doors. The doctors eventually gave up chasing me, probably because they knew I was too healthy to keep there. Opening the door, I was blinded by a burst of light. Another new feeling was shown to me.
Disappointment.
The worst thing I had felt by far. Worse than pain, despite the similarities. The brilliant shining dots were gone and instead sat a massive ball of light, searing my eyes shut. If this was what effort turned into, I would never put effort into anything again. I instantly looked away. I sat on the floor and thought. What should I do? I then discovered something.
I had nothing to do. I've been told freedom is one of the few things all life strives for, but I had never been told that there is a point where freedom can create this feeling. That is the point I had just reached. I had absolutely no clue what to do. There were so many options and yet none of them were particularly appealing. All I could do was push forward. Where? I didn't know.
After a couple minutes of walking, I found another group of humans. There were actually a lot of humans. More than I could count. There were like… 6. Groups of people walked along a row of shops and businesses. My body started doing something I've never seen it do before. It began to tremble. I tried to ignore it and continued walking. Usually, when I was confused about something, it popped into my head. But, this time, that didn't happen. I was truly, utterly aimless. My sense of touch wasn't helping, so I decided to use my sense of smell for a better idea of what it was. I didn't figure it out, but I learned something better. I followed the scent and ended up at a wooden structure. I opened the doors and found the source of the smell. A crescent shaped piece of processed wheat strung across many other edible looking items. The man behind the display of food spoke to me.
"You want a croissant, young man?"
I nodded my head and went to grab it, but my hand was immediately slapped away.
"You got any money, kid?"
Ah, money. I had forgotten all about it. You need to work for it, and that is something I was unable to do. I ignored him and grabbed it.
"You gonna pay for that?"
"I'll pay you later."
I was lying. Lying to help themselves is a normal thing all humans do, I believe.
"No the hell you won't."
I ran off with the bread in my mouth as the man was chasing after me. After a bit of running, I had finally escaped from the evil man only to bump into somebody else. There were two people wearing a lot of metal clothing. They didn't seem to want to take away my croissant, but I was still not going to trust them due to the last interactions I had with humans. I decided to play it safe and only say a single word.
"Hello."
And my hunch turned out to be right.
"You're under arrest for two counts of manslaughter. The commanding court will decide your execution date. Come with us."
[1] Line means scene switch :3