me: z...z....z...
dasch barks at passerbys outside the window.
dasch: sunshine everyone. good day for yall. wake up lazy souls.
me: ughh gosh stop dude
dasch: i've been locked here so long. get your butt up and let me out goodness
me: dude stop barking it's Sunday
dasch: why don't you get ready to go to church. i know you got sins to confess
me: i'm not going today i quit many weeks ago.. jees you ruined my freakin sleep
dasch: that's what you get for not being a good Christian
me: are we starting this already, i've barely woken up.
dasch: well i've been locked up here coz you lazybutt just went off to sleep.
me: i mean you did sleep afterall so it shouldnt be so bad.
dasch: i have my standards when it comes to where i sleep. homeless are the same
me: dude, don't you dare compare yourself to a homeless. you are inside a home as you are saying that.
dasch: it's not my house so. that makes you a homeless as well.
me: wait... i guess that has some truth to it.
dasch: yeah you are about the same as me. you got nothing that's yours.
me: umm... that sounds about right too...
dasch: and yeah, so whether you are human, you are as much a dog as i am.
me: now that's a bit stretch but i don't mind being a dog. you know what it takes to be a human?
dasch: not go to church on sunday and waking up as a homeless.
me: you are actually making alot of sense today for some reason.
dasch: it's one of those days or in fact I may have been right all along absolutely and you are just starting to slip out of your own ignorance. congrats. your game is improving.
me: all of sudden you just get all so arrogant and i just have no way to stop you. i concede and give up. you just be who you are. i will just be me.
dasch: you are finally submitting to my dominance and superiority. this is a good sign. you might as well convert from christian to my religion.
me: i don't think i'm ready for any kind of religion. i'm too irreligious. plus i cannot afford anything that requires rituals like going to a church and stuff like that.
dasch: my religion is quite simple and sensible. hear me out because it's made for modern people living day to day life. it's practical and beneficial.
me: okay i'm listening.
dasch: first i hope you can understand that money is like a religion for everyone. nothing can be done without money. without money you cannot survive. you believe it more than anything else because it never betrays you.
me: yes, that's very real and realistic.
dasch: my religion is basically a branch of that religion. mine works out such that you get more money and therefore even more devoteed to money. you basically become closer to God, the money.
me: and so when are you giving me money?
dasch: so you know how to program and make things with computer right? i know you made some stupid apps sometime ago and they all disappeared coz you forgot about them.
me. yes, i didn't know you were surveiling on me that much...? But where is this religion talk going, i'm starting to get lost.
dasch: don't worry i'm not doing cliches like ponzi or pyramid here. i just need you to execute my grand plan.
me: i am starting to not like the sound of it... what are you doing here.
dasch: listen, i'm the one in command. So, open up your computer and get ready to start coding.
me: you know, it's Sunday, it's a weekend, and once again, i've just woken up.
dasch: forget that, just do what I say.
me: I haven't even subscribed to your religion yet. And you sound like tyrant bossing me around.
dasch: just trust me, like you trusted Christanity. remember, it's all about trusting first and grace follows afterwards.
me: i don't think i am in need of any grace... but if it's money...you still have my attention.
dasch: so here it is. i need you to get on blockchain. you figure out how to get on there. you know what crypto is right?
me: dude, crypto? you starting to lose me here. i can't believe you are trying to pull this on me.
dasch: i'm not done yet still. i need you to make a coin named after me called dasch. this has nothing to do with doge coin, i'm entirely made different than doge.
me: dude, you are copying it. it's not gona work.
dasch: what if I say that dasch will be a stablecoin pegged to german currency?
me: you mean one dasch coin will always be one german money?
dasch: you are exactly right.
me: Okay... but why is it german money of all currencies?
dasch: cause i'm daschund. it's german. so it ties all the connections. it's about storytelling you see? this basically targets all german people and daschund owners. it's gona be a megahit.
me: but germany doesn't have their own money.
dasch: what do you mean? all countries have their own money.
me: dude, they use euros, remember?
dasch: ah crap, you can't be serious, that's the last matching piece in my grand scheme.
me: yeah, i guess it falls apart here, and i guess your dasch religion won't take off.
dasch: but you still see my good intention? i was gona help germany's economy and all daschund owner's out of poverty with dasch coins.
me: i don't know man, your religion needs more work. so i 'm not signing up for it.
dasch: maybe you are right, i gota flesh it out more... airtight strategy and execution. i cannot risk any chance
me: yeah, and I didn't say yet but i don't think i wana code. i'm too lazy. So i'm out even if you have it altogether.
dasch: if that's the case, you forever stay poor and homeless daschund owner.
me: it's what it is and how it has been. i guess i let it be.
dasch: can't you seriously be more motivated? you are disappointing. i'm embarassed for you.
me: i'm not a hunting dog like you daschund. i don't have the long nose and quick four legs like you, ready to fight.
dasch: you know what more you need than legs? some life and exercise and girlfriend.. Get a life, go exercise, and find some girlfriend.
me: you are very mean.