And with this, we come to the end of this small "dissection" project. Five chapters, more than 47,251 words, and an emotional weight I never expected to carry. Of course, these are not the only parts I edited or rewrote in this novel, but they were the ones that stayed with me the longest. They were the ones that shaped something in me while I worked on them.
This will also be the first and last time I write such an in depth reflection for a novel I translate. Why? Because this one only had three hundred something chapters. The other novels I work on are a different story. Most of them have more than 500 chapters or huge word counts. Reborn as the Fallen Idol, I Leaned Into the Chaos! has more than 600 chapters, Troublemaker's Guide to Immortality has more than 1,000, and True Heir of Chaos: From Villainess to Empress has over 2,000. I physically, mentally, and spiritually cannot dissect them all like this (｡•́︿•̀｡)
But let me shift focus now, from the characters to the person behind the translation.
Why did I begin translating novels in the first place?
The answer is simple, and a little sad. It was because the stories I loved were not available in English. No official releases. No fan translations. Not even messy MTLs. And since I prefer reading offline, keeping those stories on my device was nearly impossible. So I started translating them myself and uploading them where others could read them too.
And why did I choose this novel as my first translation project?
It is because of Su Min and Xie Yingying.
To be honest, seeing Su Min feels low key like seeing myself. I feel connected to her in more ways than one. And with Xie Yingying, the way she keeps chasing someone, the way she hides her feelings and holds everything inside, trying to be strong in silence... I understood that too. The quiet effort. The strength that does not need to shout.
In both of them, I saw pieces of myself.
That is why I chose this story. It meant something to me even before I translated a single word.
For context, Chinese is not my native language. It is not even a language I have formally studied. I graduated from university two years ago with a degree in Japanese Language and Literature Education. My native language is Javanese, followed by Bahasa Indonesia, then Japanese, and finally English.
Japanese has always been part of my life thanks to my father and his side of the family, who loved anime and Japanese games. English is something I started learning properly in the second or third grade of elementary school. So if you find parts of my English awkward, or feel something was misunderstood, I sincerely apologize. I really am doing my best, and I am still learning.
To be honest, I have been unemployed for about half a year now. My mental health has not been great either. I am 27 this year, and sometimes I doubt whether I can function as a normal adult at all.
Let's just say I was raised by an NPD father who always preferred sons over daughters. And like a fool, I chased his approval for more than two decades. In the process, I never really got to know myself. I never learned how to be human in the way others seemed to. Socializing, boundaries, self worth, none of that existed in my world. I was not raised so much as I was molded. Conditioned.
We were not rich, but we could eat. That was enough.
He raised me into a strange contradiction. On one hand, I became a traditional woman: submissive, good at housework, dependent, and obedient. On the other hand, because he favored boys, he also gave me the tools of masculinity: leadership, life skills, survival. Sometimes I wonder if he was shaping me not as a daughter, but as the ideal partner for someone who could understand and orbit someone like him.
That contradiction still shows in how people see me. I was born in 1998, and my younger brother was born in 2004. Whenever we go somewhere together, people almost always assume I am the younger one. It is strange because to me, his face is clearly younger. He still looks like someone who is growing, childish and a bit silly. I mean that in a half affectionate way. But people look at me and treat me like a little girl. Sure, maybe I have a baby face, but I am not that young, right?
When I buy things from small shops or local businesses, the owners often speak to me gently, the way you would talk to a kid. Sometimes they even give me extra items or little gifts, like I am being rewarded for being cute. And it is not only older people. Even among friends, I get treated like the youngest in the group. Sometimes people younger than me act like I am their little sister. Seriously?
Maybe I give off an adorable and obedient little girl vibe. Or maybe it is my eyes, which apparently look too clear and clueless, like some spoiled child who does not know the world. Or maybe it is the way I carry myself, too naive, too careful. I honestly do not know. But I do think it connects back to the way I was raised.
And the strange part is, I am often the leader. In organizations or group settings, I either end up in charge or I somehow become the person who influences the one in charge. I enjoy that kind of power. I crave it in a way. I know how to take care of myself and others, I am capable. But at the same time, I struggle to function like a normal adult. It is a weird balance. Hard to explain.
I carry a lot. Trauma, confusion, exhaustion, suicidal thoughts, and I often attempt it. Maybe it is anxiety, depression, somatization, intellectualization, and so many other things. But I also carry a tiny spark of healing, even if it flickers.
That is why translating became something more than just a task.
It changed into something precious.
When I received my first Ko fi donation, I cried. Thank you, Magn0lia. Your kindness meant more than you know. But it is not only donations on my Ko fi or Patreon that bring me joy. Every vote, review, and comment gives me something I rarely had before, a sense of connection. A feeling of being seen. A feeling of being appreciated for something I made with my own hands and heart.
And to FU HUA, thank you, truly. You often take the time to correct my words and polish the rough edges. That kind of quiet, consistent support stays with me more than you probably realize.
Maybe all this gratitude sounds like too much. Or maybe it is just the approval seeking part of me that still lingers, hoping to be enough somehow... (・・;)ゞ
Still, I can feel my heart softening. My mind slowly relaxing.
On June 25th, 2025, I had a dream.
In it, I was a fox, running freely across open fields with soft, shifting violet fur. It was so beautiful that for the first time in my life, I felt beautiful too. Not in a shallow or vain way, but with a quiet and steady sense of worth. That was new. I have always been insecure about my looks. Even when friends told me people had crushes on me, I could not believe it. I never felt attractive. I put pride in my mind, not my face.
But in that dream, I was light. Unburdened. Alive. And for the first time, I was not afraid to be seen. I felt free. Beautiful. Happy.
And when I woke up, I was stunned. Because I had never dreamed like that before. My usual dreams were about war, betrayal, and power games, things I find fascinating but never comforting.
This dream was nothing like that. It felt like healing.
That is why I wrote this chapter. That is why I decided to reflect on my work like this. Because translating, writing, and connecting with you became a thread I could follow through the dark. It reminded me I was not alone.
So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Thank you for reading. For voting. For reviewing. For donating. For walking with me through this story, through Su Min's ambition, through Xie Yingying's devotion, through all the quiet threads of strength, love, and sorrow woven into this strange and beautiful novel.
This is officially the last chapter, so if you enjoyed the journey, I humbly ask for your votes, reviews and ratings on the main page, recommendations, or donations if you feel generous with absolutely no pressure. It truly means the world to me.
Even though I'm not contracted with Webnovel, your reviews really do help boost my account's visibility. Webnovel officially promotes only contracted authors, so for non-contracted translators like me, there are only a few "free boosts" available—like New Release, Fresh Stories, Potential Starlet, and Ongoing Originals. Out of these, I've only received three free boosts so far, and "Ongoing Originals" was only for I Became a Fairy And Lived Forever in the Fairy World.
Let me explain a bit:
New Release: For recently uploaded stories.
Fresh Stories: Highlights new content that Webnovel thinks might attract readers.
Potential Starlet: Stories that show potential for popularity based on engagement.
Ongoing Originals: A boost for serialized stories that are already being published.
Since my translations fall under the non-contracted category, I rely on things like your reviews, stars, and follower count to reach more readers. Even just a review or a star rating can make a difference in helping my account grow and reach a wider audience.
This is why your reviews are so critical:
Visibility: The most important thing is getting a visible star rating next to the novel's title, like the one you see on I Became a Fairy And Lived Forever In The Fairy World. To unlock this visible rating, a novel needs 10 reviews. That star rating significantly increases the story's credibility and visibility to new readers.
Platform Promotion: A high-quality star rating and consistent votes signals to Webnovel that a story is popular, which helps it show up more frequently in reader recommendations and searches.
Followers: Following my profile by clicking the little "Love" or heart-shaped button is another massive help! When the follower count goes up, it boosts my account's overall visibility, making the platform more likely to recommend my work.
Every review, vote, and follow directly helps this story reach more readers and keeps me motivated to bring you the next chapter!
How to help:
✨ On Web:
Scroll to the top of the novel's main page and click the blue "Write a Review" button near the bottom, under "You May Also Like." A pop-up will appear where you can rate the writing, characters, and world.
📱 On the App:
Tap the "Rate This Book" section (just below Fandom Rankings). A star rating box will pop up—add your thoughts and hit submit!
Honestly, translating is a labor of love for me. I spend almost all my waking hours at my laptop working on these stories. I'm not trying to pressure you at all, but I'd be lying if I said that the lack of job opportunities right now doesn't make every bit of support mean a lot. Just to give some context, since I started uploading my translations here, I've only received two donations and one subscriber on the lowest tier of my Patreon. That's it.
Even if you can't or don't want to donate, leaving a review, giving a star rating, or following my profile still helps a ton. These small actions help my account reach more readers and make the translations visible to a wider audience. Honestly, every little bit counts. Getting a donation, reading a review, or seeing a new subscriber really brightens my day, gives tangible support for all the time I put in, and motivates me to keep translating more stories for everyone. You can also support me directly here:
My [Ko-fi]! ☕️: https://ko-fi.com/rikhi
My [Patreon]!🎨: https://patreon.com/rikhi
Thank you for reading. Thank you for walking with Su Min, Xie Yingying, and me.
I'm really grateful. Truly.
And if you like this translation style, feel free to visit my profile! Most of the novels I translate are tagged with things like #NoCP (No Couple Pairing, the MC is single), #Yuri, #Infrastructure, #FemaleMC, #Xianxia, #StrongWoman, #Rebirth, #Game, #Counterattack, #Transmigration, #System, #Apocalypse, #BehindTheScenes, and #Entertainment.
You can also follow me by clicking the little "Love" or heart-shaped button on my profile. You'll know it worked when the number goes up and the heart turns white ♡
That way, you won't miss it when I upload a new novel, and you'll get a notification right away.
See you in the next world, the next story.
—With love, your translator, Reiya (ฅ'ω'ฅ)
===
Psst... hey, you. Yes, you!!!
If it ever feels like the world is dark and everyone's against you, maybe take a moment to read "Reborn as the Fallen Idol, I Leaned Into the Chaos!" on my account.
Let's heal slowly, one step at a time. You're not alone ( ´•̥̥̥ω•̥̥̥` )
After all,
"We are all children of a beautiful world."
(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ
...and hey, if you're in the mood for something lighter—something chaotic, silly, and full of laughs—why not try "Troublemaker's Guide to Immortality"?
It's also up on my account, and it might just make your day a little brighter.
===
~ "A lot of things still hurt. Some wounds don't heal just because you try to think positively. But what used to be rot has become scabs now. They still hurt when you look at them—but at least they're not festering anymore." ~
===
(Side note, if you're curious! ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝✧)
You might be wondering where "rikhi" comes from. Well... it's a little nameplay on my full name: Reiya Keith Alberich!
Here's how it breaks down:
Alberich, when written in Japanese, becomes アルベリヒ (Aruberihi)
So from "Riki" in Alberich, I got "Rikhi"
I just stylized the spelling a bit because it looked cute (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄))
But there's a second meaning too:
Ri from Reiya, K from Keith, and Hi from Alberich (based on the German pronunciation of the "ch")—put them together and you get... Rikhi!
Oh, and I often use "Rikhi" as my username in games or other platforms too!
If you ever stumble across an account with that name... well, maybe it's me?? (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و ✧
As for the full name I use here, it's not my legal name, at least not yet. But I've been introducing myself as Reiya Keith Alberich since college.
Only my old classmates still remember my legal name. To everyone else, I've always been Reiya. Even the lecturers who taught my classes knew my original name but still called me Reiya, just like everyone else.
Meanwhile, people in my hometown, neighbors, relatives, and anyone who knew me before college, still use my original name.
That includes old friends from elementary, middle, and high school. Though honestly, in my personal dictionary, the word "friend" means something closer to "best friend" for most people, so my social circle might seem more selective than usual.
My parents and siblings also know about the new name. They haven't switched to calling me that, probably out of habit and because I haven't legally changed it yet, but they're aware of it and not opposed.
Interestingly, I've always had a different nickname for every stage of my education. It's basically the same name, using the same words, just in different variations. Why? Don't ask. I honestly have no idea either. (｡•́︿•̀｡)
It doesn't bother me though. It's kind of helpful. I can tell who's who in my life just by how they call me.
I first started searching for a new name in my third year of high school. At the time, I hadn't studied Japanese formally. I only started that once I entered college, so my understanding of kanji and Japanese naming conventions was still pretty limited. I basically pieced the name together using words I knew and liked. So yeah, if it sounds a little strange, that's why. (・・;)ゞ
It's not like I'll write them in kanji anyway, because foreign names use katakana when written in Japanese, not kanji.
Here's the breakdown:
Reiya (冷夜 / 玲夜)
冷 (Rei) – "cold" or "cool"
夜 (Ya) – "night"
This gives two core meanings:
→ "Cold night"
→ "Diamond in the night"(with "Rei" also representing a diamond or something precious)
I was born at 3 a.m., so the idea of a cold, dark night made sense. But I also wanted to express something more symbolic: a diamond shining in darkness. Night is dark, and a diamond reflects light. So "a diamond in the night" can mean a guiding light, a hidden brilliance, or a beacon in the dark.
Or in Chinese:
玲 (Líng) carries a sense of something delicate, resonant, and beautiful, often used in names to suggest brightness, clarity, or a gem-like quality, like the tinkling sound of jade or the brilliance of a diamond.
夜 (Yè) means night.
So 玲夜 (Líng Yè) evokes a poetic image: a shining brilliance in the silent night, or a gemstone gleaming in darkness. It keeps the same essence as Reiya—cool, luminous, and quietly powerful.
Keith
I took Keith from the character Keith Aero Windermere in Macross Delta, the calm, commanding Silver Knight, and the highest-ranking officer of the Aerial Knights. I liked how he carried himself with silent confidence and strategic leadership. That image stuck with me.
Alberich
This is the most symbolic part.
Alberich is a name from German mythology, a dwarven king and guardian of treasures, often depicted as wise, cunning, and fiercely protective.
It's a name associated with leadership, power, and sometimes even darkness or mystery, but not purely negative. It represents someone who knows how to guard what matters, someone who might live in the shadows, but still stands strong.
So when you combine it all, my full name holds a meaning like:
"A silver knight, born in the coldest night, carrying the spirit of Alberich."
Or in a more symbolic sense:
"A silver knight who becomes a guiding light in the darkness, with the strength to protect and lead, even if quietly."
Why did I choose Keith and Alberich in particular?Partly because I love being in charge (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧But more deeply, back then I knew I was broken, and I wanted to change.
By choosing names tied to strength, wisdom, and protection, I hoped to steady myself, to hold myself together, and perhaps in time, to lead and shield others too. Or at the very least, able to lead myself ♡
Oh, and one more reason. I'm under 155 cm tall, so choosing Alberich, a dwarven guardian figure, felt kind of fitting too.
Short kings and queens, rise up! ༼ つ ◕‿◕ ◕ ༽つ