It was raining. Hard. The kind of rain that drowns out even your own thoughts—so loud, so endless, it fills the silence inside your head with something else. Elias sat in the back garden behind the east tower, the forbidden one no one visited anymore, soaked to the bone. His robe clung to his skin, his hair dripped, but he didn't move. Couldn't.
He wanted the cold to hurt.
Because it still didn't hurt as much as whatever was inside him.
His fingers trembled slightly as he stared down at them—black veins pulsing just faintly beneath the skin, barely noticeable unless you looked close. A reminder. Of the demon magic. Of Rael. Of the night they shared. Of the way it all started. Of the fact that something in him would never be the same again.
He was unraveling. Slowly. Quietly.
"You're getting better at suppressing it," Rael's voice broke into his head again, softer than usual. Tentative. Like he knew he shouldn't be here right now, but came anyway.
Elias didn't answer.
"You're not saying anything again," Rael murmured, his voice tinged with something Elias couldn't name. "You've been like this for three days."
"I don't want to talk to you."
That silenced Rael. But not for long.
"I'm not the one avoiding the truth."
"Then what is the truth, Rael?" Elias snapped, standing slowly, his face twisted with wet, hurt fury. "That I've become some cursed freak with demon veins crawling under my skin? That I can barely sleep without screaming? That every time I close my eyes, I feel you in places I didn't even know existed? That I can't go five minutes without wondering if any of this was real or just some twisted game you're playing?"
Rael's voice stayed low. "It was real."
"Then why do I feel so empty?" Elias shouted, his voice cracking. "Why do I feel like I'm losing myself just to keep this magic inside me from tearing everything apart? Why didn't you tell me it would feel like this—like I'm constantly fighting to stay myself?"
The silence stretched between them like a chasm.
"I didn't know it would affect you this way," Rael finally said, and this time, he sounded… honest. Sad, even. "You weren't supposed to carry the burden alone."
"Then help me!" Elias cried, falling to his knees again. "Don't just appear and disappear and tell me I'm strong or that I'm yours. Just—help me. Make me feel like I'm not alone. Even if you're lying… please… just pretend I'm enough."
There it was. The rawest truth. The part Elias had buried deepest.
Because Rael didn't say those things. He didn't say "I love you." He didn't call Elias special. He didn't stay.
A presence warmed the air suddenly. Rael appeared—really appeared—kneeling beside him, cloak soaked in rain, golden hair plastered to his cheeks. He looked too perfect to be real.
But his face… his face looked human now. Pained. Tired.
"I never wanted to break you," Rael whispered. "I wanted to protect you. I never thought I'd end up being the thing that hurts you the most."
He reached out slowly, his fingers brushing Elias's cheek. Elias didn't pull away this time. He didn't have the strength.
"I'm sorry."
Elias closed his eyes, the tears blending into the rain already on his face.
"I don't want you to be sorry," Elias whispered. "I want you to stay."
Rael leaned in, his forehead against Elias's.
"I'm not going anywhere."
And for once, Elias didn't argue. Didn't yell. Didn't try to be strong.
He just let himself be held. In the rain. By the thing that broke him. By the one he still wanted anyway.
Even if it destroyed him in the end.