We live in our own little world. We hardly have any reason to interact with others. We're too warn out to.
We don't make any progress in our relationship. I sometimes wonder if what Noona claimed is true. Am I suffering from survivor's guilt? I am content with what we have. No one will come looking for a dead person or a mercenary. We can spend the remainder of our lives like this. In a daze. The same monotone life.
I yawn.
"Go upstairs if you feel like sleeping."
"I can't if I don't hear you breathing."
"If you were going to keep sleeping on the couch why bother moving into the room upstairs."
"If you are so bothered about my sleep, why not let me sleep beside you."
An ugly pause.
"Go upstairs. It's your medication."
"I am comfortable here."
"Were you always this stubborn?"
"I am wolf remember?" I howl as a joke.
She looks at me sternly, her helplessness evident in her eyes.
"Stay here then, I will make some porridge to warm you up."
I grab her hand.
"Or you could warm up my bed."
I was really pushing this now.
"Jaeha-ya, have some sense."
She leaves to go cook.
I see her working in the open kitchen. Her movements always so elegant.
"Have you retired now?"
Without looking up she asked.
"That's...hard to say."
"What about you? No more planet dominating schemes?"
I joke.
She responds with a sad smile.
"Why did you stop?"
"I thought you understood."
"You saw Anna becoming you."
"I felt I had tried enough. This was enough."
"What do you plan on doing now?"
"Live life as it comes."
"I do not have a home, no personal connections, no profession. I am simply drifting."