I am three years old right now and here is my dear elder brother looking towards me with dominating eyes. I am pretty sure he is going to brag about something. Everytime he finds something to show off, and everytime it just keeps getting worse.
"Chand, that ABCD you learn, you know I can use that to write words even full sentences, am I not amazing." Maybe this time I will show him a little miracle. I instantly toke his pen and wrote 'My eight year old brother is bragging to his three year old sister about being able to write full sentences.' The look on his face was priceless.
"You can already write sentences, why didn't you tell anyone about it?"
"Big brother it's just a little secret between us, okay!"
"But why? Then why do you keep getting alphabets wrong?"
"You see, umm.. I don't want to skip classes or something, besides I enjoy it this way. You know I can even solve those troublesome Maths problems of yours."
"I would not spit anything out if you would help me with those questions."
"I guess, it's something I should do, I mean I won't enjoy you being beaten up for failing." And here he goes puffing his mouth.
"Never in my life have I failed! Got that!"
"Never in your life have you got good grades! I totally understand!"
"Shut up!"
"Bring your book and notebook already!"
"Fine!"
******************
Finally we were done with his homework. According to him it was the perfect time to play on mummy's phone which was lying on the table. I am suppose to help him quietly play and tell him incase danger in his language mummy in mine approaches. Apparently it's my job to help my elder brother with his 'hardships in life'.
Look at him he is all into it. Staring at the mobile moving his hands like his life depends on it. Wait! Why is he making those stupid faces. What a complete idiot!
"Kush! What are you doing?"
I am confident he is gonna lie. Both him and I know when mummy is busy in the kitchen she just ask him this question and never checks on him till her work is done.
"I am completing my homework!"
"Okay I will check whether you have done it or not!"
"When I said I am doing my homework means I am doing my homework! You just never seem to believe me!"
"Quietly do your work! You just never do it and when you do it, it is all wrong!"
"Aaahhhhh..."
What a complete lier he is. He is got real talent for it.
"My cute sis, don't tell mummy. Okay!"
I just gave him a nod with a mischievous grin. The grin as a sign that I might blackmail him. That's what siblings do.
"Bro mummy is coming!"
"What!"
The way he closed the game threw the phone opened his book and notebook, held a pen, started scribbling, it was both shocking and hilarious. And in came mummy.
"Kush were you really studying."
He nodded with full confidence.
"I am pretty sure I kept my phone on the table what is it doing on bed?"
"I dunno, it was here when I came in."
"You are lying! You were playing game weren't you?"
"No. I was doing my homework."
"Chandni what was he doing?"
"Homework."
"Oh okay, I'll check it later."
"Okay."
When mummy left he turned to me.
"Sis you are the best! Best sister in the whole world. I thought you were gonna break our bro - sis alliance."
"You'll have to help me later."
"Okay!"
What a naive kid calling me the best sister when I am such a horrible one. Why!
"In order to make our bro- sis alliance official, I'll like you to read these terms and conditions."
Whats this now? You will have to help me with homework. You are not allowed to tell mummy about this 'allyanse.' The spelling is incorrect. You will have to help me in pretending I an studying when I am gaming. You will have to bring mummy's phone. I will keep 'you' secret. He tried writing your but forgot the 'r'. Explains his English grades. Actually now I am wondering how he managed to fetch an B+. Last, you have to sign this no 'meter' what. That's matter. Guess I have no choice but to sign it. Like he literally wrote 'you have to sign this no 'meter' what.
"Okay now I'll sign it." Look at him signing it like it's a cheque. Kids! How very stupid.
"Hence are bro - sis alliance is officially official. In order to respect this summit and pact we will now have a handshake." Sumit! Pact! Where did he even learn these words? Guess his vocabulary got him the B+, huh! Honestly, I am impressed.
Look at him putting his hand forward like this is a big deal that will define the future of his company.
Well, I'll shake it if it makes him happy. He is so happy! How very childish! These are those times when I too want to be a child again. Then again when was I a child! A nation at war teaches you how to grow up fast, how to sleep with empty stomachs, how to force a smile even when everything is falling apart, how to work even when your legs give up, how to try to handle things even when they seem to slip out of your very hands. Child was a term for me which never came alone. Always, always it came with the word orphan like it was the very description of my very existence. Even now after being reincarnated and living a new life there are these nights when I have haunting nightmares. There are these times when I don't feel like existing.There are these moments when I know everyone surrounding me today might not tomorrow. Any night, can be our last. Death is a term I never feared. From the beginning of my awful previous life when I knew death was the way out. Way out of this awfully cruel world. This has not changed even now. Death has been the synonym of peace for me. Sometimes I just wanna disappear. Disappear into thin air. Disappear so no one could find me. Erased from everyone's memories. This world would be much better without trash like me lingering. No matter where I am, how I am, what I am, there is this one constant unwavering feeling 'Sometimes I just want to disappear.'