Hearing Darren lay it on that thick, Stussy—standing beside him—couldn't help turning away, rolling her eyes with quiet contempt.
How embarrassing.
In that moment, she finally understood why Darren always managed to thrive no matter where he went. The man could pour out smooth compliments on the spot—and somehow make them sound sincere.
Anyone less discerning would have been completely taken in, drowning happily in his flattery.
But…
Do you really think Dr. Vegapunk is some shallow fool like the people you usually charm?
Stussy smirked to herself, waiting eagerly for the blowback.
And sure enough—
Vegapunk showed no sign of pleasure. He frowned slightly and said, "Darren-san, do you truly believe… I'm that shallow?"
"Do you think that kind of praise would actually make me happy?"
Darren nodded earnestly, face solemn.
"Why wouldn't it?"
He let out a deep sigh, his expression turning almost wistful.
"Compared to you, Dr. Vegapunk, I—Rogers Darren—am indeed a shallow, vulgar man."
"I can't comprehend your heights. I can only judge you through my limited perspective."
"If I offended you, I sincerely apologize."
Vegapunk shook his head. "No, Darren-san, you've misunderstood me."
Darren blinked, genuinely puzzled.
Vegapunk stared at him gravely for a beat—then abruptly turned away, scratching his head in sheepish embarrassment, a faint smile tugging at his lips.
"What I meant was… even if you praise me like that, it won't make me happy."
Crack.
Stussy felt something snap in her mind, like she'd been struck by lightning. Her expression froze.
Dr. Vegapunk… had even used "-san"!
Darren couldn't help but chuckle.
Even a genius five hundred years ahead of the world was still just a person.
Who doesn't like praise?
And more importantly—it always depends on who's saying it.
If Borsalino delivered the same line with that oily grin of his, everyone would assume it was sarcasm.
But when Darren said it—mixing earnest admiration with an almost imperceptible barb—Vegapunk couldn't help falling right into it.
"Ahem… Darren-san." Vegapunk cleared his throat twice, drew in a deep breath, and forced a sudden solemnity into his voice. "Since you've come all this way without notice… please, have a seat."
"In that case," he continued gravely, "I'll entertain you with what I consider my greatest invention."
"Your greatest invention?" Darren's eyes lit up.
He'd already seen enough outside the lab—Lineage Factor research, Artificial Devil Fruits—each one astonishing in its own right.
And now Vegapunk was implying he had something even more groundbreaking?
Darren flicked a glance at Borsalino, who had already claimed a chair and was leisurely trimming his nails like none of this concerned him. Darren decided against asking questions and simply waited.
Vegapunk turned, rummaged through a drawer, and produced a small glass bottle. Using tweezers, he extracted two fingernail-sized capsules and dropped one into each of two empty glasses.
"Darren-san," Vegapunk asked, eyes shining, "are you ready?"
"This is what I call my greatest invention."
He spread his arms wide, hands trembling with excitement.
"Humanity's Dream!"
Humanity's Dream…
Darren's pupils tightened.
Stussy's heart began to race.
What could possibly deserve a name like that?
Only Borsalino remained unchanged, still absorbed in his nails.
"Watch closely!"
Vegapunk lifted a dropper and let a single drop of water fall into each glass.
The lab sank into an unnatural silence.
Darren and Stussy held their breath, eyes locked on the glasses, unwilling to miss even the smallest shift.
Hiss. Hiss.
Suddenly—
Two plumes of white steam erupted.
And then something absurd unfolded right in front of them.
The moment the water touched the glass, black liquid surged up visibly, rising fast—fast enough to be seen with the naked eye—until it nearly reached the rim, then stopped as if perfectly measured.
"Do you see it?" Vegapunk lifted one glass high, holding it aloft like a pilgrim presenting a sacred relic. His face shone with manic devotion.
"This completely defies the laws of material conversion! A single drop of water produces a full cup!"
Stussy stared, stunned. She didn't fully understand the theory, but the admiration in her eyes was impossible to hide.
Darren, meanwhile, went utterly still.
A black vein of irritation twitched on his forehead.
He knew that smell instantly.
Coffee.
"…So this is a cup of coffee?" Darren's lips twitched.
"Exactly!" Vegapunk beamed and thrust the other cup toward him. "What better way to awaken a drowsy mind and invigorate a weary body than a steaming cup of coffee?"
"Because of coffee, I've created countless inventions and completed so much research!"
He took a sip. His face flushed, and for a moment he looked as if he'd aged backward several years.
"Just one drop of water, and you get a piping-hot cup of coffee!"
"It's my inspiration, the foundation of my stamina—my muse!"
As Vegapunk rambled with fervent sincerity, the veins on Darren's forehead bulged. His fists clenched so hard his knuckles went pale.
If Vegapunk didn't look so fanatical—so utterly genuine—Darren would have thought the old man was messing with him.
Darren glanced at Borsalino.
Borsalino grinned back.
Fine. You're here to enjoy the show too, huh?
Darren shook his head, staring at Vegapunk's feverish expression, at a loss for words.
A wage slave needing coffee is one thing. The world's greatest scientist too?
"Hm," Vegapunk said suddenly, tilting his head as if something had just occurred to him. "Darren-san is probably struggling with the side effects of his Devil Fruit awakening right now, am I correct?"
Darren froze.
Wait… is that coffee really that potent? Did your IQ just skyrocket?
To be continued...