Chapter 53: Training. Trauma. Foreplay (His POV)
The Nexus had been scrubbed within an inch of perfection. Gold banners gleamed along the dome, embroidered with Aerion's sigil. White marble stretched underfoot, polished so bright it hurt to look at. Rows of mortals, demigods, and lesser spirits knelt in reverence, heads bowed, their whispers hushed to reverent awe. The Pantheon stood at the center dais, arrayed in their war regalia. Luxor shone in gilded plate, every curve etched with light. Tairochi looked carved from mountains, his stone armor as heavy as his silence. Vitaria draped herself in laurels and silver filigree, Ravina's black thorn-woven breastplate glistened like poison dressed as protection. One by one, each gleamed with authority, the living embodiment of the divine law they so adored.
The doors opened. Every head turned. Every eye blinked. I walked in dressed like a flamingo. Pink silk clung in gaudy glory, feathered cloak the color of bubblegum sunsets cascading down my back in ridiculous grandeur. Rhinestones glittered across my vest, catching the holy light like a disco ball no one asked for. A wide-brimmed hat rose far too tall, rimmed with sequined feathers that bobbed with every step. My shoes, oh, gods bless them, were enameled in blush lacquer, tipped with curled flamingo beaks. And the cufflinks? Embroidered in painstaking thread: Silent. But Deadly.
I said nothing. I wasn't allowed to speak in this chamber, not after "the ruling." Not after they blocked my claim. My divine punishment. Not after Ravina snapped my last legal defense in half and Aerion's trap shut around me like an iron jaw. But my outfit screamed louder than any sermon. I strutted forward, feathers swaying in rhythmic mockery, every jewel daring them to choke on their sanctimony. Not armor. Not steel. Not unity. A bird of paradise strutting through a graveyard.
Luxor's jaw tightened, gold dimming at its edges. Not irritation, shame. He turned back to the gathered throng, voice booming with false reverence. "We gather today, the day of his birth, in honor of our leader, our brother, the embodiment of Valor and Law. Aerion, the shield of mortals, the light of the Nexus."
My teeth ground behind my smile. Shield? More like spear. More like chains. Light? He carved shadows into her flesh, but yes, let's call it radiance.
Vitaria stepped forward, hands folded over silver laurels, voice trembling not with sorrow, but with the pressure of standing atop a lie. "Aerion led us through millennia. His hand guided mortal sanctuaries, his wisdom bound us together. We honor his sacrifices. We honor his goodness."
Goodness? His "sacrifices" were never his own body. His justice was a blade always turned outward, never toward himself.
Maximus, of course, raised a goblet, draped in crimson velvet armor, pretending solemnity even as wine stained his lips. "To Aerion! Who built cathedrals higher than mountains, who drank deeper than rivers, who showed us that Order was not chains but celebration."
I nearly laughed. Chains not chains? Tell that to the Tribunal. Tell that to the law that gagged me. Tell that to the loophole Aerion tore from my hands by feeding his own son to my rage.
Yara looked at me for one long moment, her smile brittle as seafoam. Fury churned beneath her ribs like a storm she wasn't allowed to summon. Ravina stepped forward last, voice sweet as rotted honey. "He was our law. He was our strength. He was our judgment. May we honor him not only in memory, but in the justice he carried into the world. Justice, lawful and binding."
The words struck like blades, slashing under my ribs. Lawful. Binding. They knew exactly where to twist the knife. My fingers twitched at my side, desperate to snap, to burn the banners down in roaring chaos. Instead, I stood. Silent. A flamingo among statues. The silence they forced on me screamed louder than any outburst. Around me, the gods' voices rose together in hymn, chanting Aerion's name, each syllable striking my bones like hammer blows. The mortals wept, their faith choking the air. I did not weep. I did not kneel. I did not sing. I stood. Pink feathers bright against their armor. A gaudy joke at a funeral. Every jewel a blade. Every feather a middle finger.
Inside, I burned. Fury coiled like storm clouds, chaos pressing against the leash they'd tied around my throat. My silence was not submission, it was venom brewing, waiting. Valor. Peace. Order. Lies. They wanted me humiliated. They wanted me diminished. They wanted me silent. Fine, I would be silent. But one day, I would make them choke on their own hymns.
The hymns still echoed in my ears long after the doors slammed shut behind me. Their voices, their chains, their law parading as justice. I carried it like a weight in my chest, feathers and rhinestones doing nothing to dull the sting. Every jewel I'd worn, every joke stitched into fabric, had been nothing but armor against the silence they forced on me. And gods help me, it almost broke me.
But then, Arbor. Her. The air shifted the moment I stepped back into my own realm. No hymns. No sanctimonious banners. Just wood and light and the soft hum of a house that remembered me. I shed the flamingo feathers at the door, let them dissolve into smoke, until I found her. I went to the kitchen, no flair, no illusions, no froth-art masterpieces. Just two mugs and a roast strong enough to wake the dead. No spirals today. No hearts. Just heat. Just warmth. She needed warm.
When she padded in, hair a glorious disaster, eyes still clouded with sleep, shoulders loose from exhaustion, I was waiting. Mug in hand. She took it without a word, sipped once, and I watched the tension bleed out of her like a knot pulled loose. She didn't thank me. She didn't need to. We sat in silence. Not the brittle kind. Not heavy. Just silence that allowed itself to exist. Twin mugs. Shared quiet. Nothing asked. Nothing taken. For a while, that was enough.
Until she set her mug down. Stretched and threw a lazy jab at the air. I blinked. "...Are you shadowboxing at my breakfast table?"
She ducked. Spun. Kicked like the air had offended her. Graceful. Sharp. Efficient. The thought hit me. She wasn't just playing. She was training. I stood, half-laughing, half-chilled. "Oh, you're not fighting me. You're fighting everything."
She didn't answer. Just smirked, that small, knowing tilt of her lips that said watch me.
Gods above, I saw it. She wasn't running from the dark anymore. She was walking straight into it. Head high. Fists ready. I drained my mug, held out my hand like I was offering her a battlefield. "Let's go break something, my shadow queen."
The words left my mouth, but something twisted low in my chest. Because the way she moved, it wasn't ornamental. It wasn't for show. Every step, every strike was precise. Efficient. Surgical. Her body didn't sway with beauty, it calculated angles. She wasn't remembering dance. She was remembering how to kill. She moved like war. For the first time, I wondered if I'd missed it. I'd fallen for her smirks and sleepy limbs, her stubborn fire and quiet strength, and somehow I'd mistaken her stillness for fragility. Her silence for softness. Her curling into me at night for weakness. But none of it was weakness. The silence was calculation. The stillness, control. The way she leaned on me? Strategy.
And me, the god of chaos, lord of noise, I'd been fool enough to think she was breakable. But she wasn't. She had trained in twelve SHITS temples. Learned pain in a dozen dialects. Survived every altar they put her on. She hadn't just been carved for the gods. She had studied them. Stolen their skills. Worn survival until it fit like skin. Now I could see it waking up in her.
The mind, brilliant, terrifying, precise. The body, scarred, divine, unrelenting. The woman, more than mortal, more than goddess. And me, what if I couldn't keep up? What if the Annie I adored, the one who rolled her eyes at my dramatics, who kissed my smirk like a dare, who let me build forts and coffee hearts, what if that was just her cocoon? A lull between wars? What if this was her breaking free?
She turned to me then, sweat-damp and glowing, her eyes feral with something I couldn't name. She raised a brow, hands signing the single challenge: Ready?
I blinked. Swallowed. Smiled anyway. Still Annie. But gods, so much more. I took her hand. And this time, when I said, "Let's go break something," I meant it. Even if the thing she chose to break… was me.
Arbor dropped us into one of my favorite training chambers, a cathedral in ruins, its stained glass shattered into glittering sand. A place where even the light felt like it had sinned. I expected sweat. Maybe a few half-hearted kicks. Some sparring to loosen her up. I did not expect violence.
The second her feet hit the ground, she fell into a stance I didn't recognize. Not dance. Not display. Combat. Low. Coiled. Eyes sharp as razors. She shrank herself, not timid, but deliberate. Smaller. Quieter. Sharper. Like she wanted the world to forget her existence right before she tore its throat out.
She moved. Crack. A punch split the air. Spin. Elbow. Drop. Sweep. No flourish. No hesitation. Not reacting. Remembering. Gods, she was beautiful. Not soft. Not celestial. Deadly. I leaned against a broken pillar and told myself not to look too enchanted. Failed spectacularly. She wasn't performing. Not for me, not for anyone. She was testing herself. Tearing the ghosts out of her own bones. Her heel slammed into a practice dummy, sending it cartwheeling across the sand before it burst into sparks. I blinked. She just roundhouse-kicked a training dummy into the astral plane and I am unreasonably turned on.
Arbor, ever the smug bastard, conjured another dummy. She destroyed that one too. I laughed, half in awe, half in pure disbelief. "Chaos help me, this is my wife."
The thought hit me like prophecy. Not yet. Not officially. But someday. When that day came, I wasn't putting a crown on her. I'd make the whole universe kneel. Because she didn't move like someone surviving anymore. She moved like someone choosing. Then the cruel thought crept in. What if she'd gone to Aerion? What if this fire had been sharpened into a blade for his altar? She would've been perfect. Terrifying. She would never have smiled again.
I looked at her now, sweat, grit, bloodied knuckles, and saw the truth. She was a weapon. But with me? She was Annie. She glanced at me, eyes locked, a silent dare. I smirked. "Oh, we're sparring now?"
Arbor whistled. The floor shifted, the cathedral dimming, a circle forming in the sand. I stepped forward, cracking my neck, rolling my shoulders, grinning like a fool already in love with the end of the world. "So what's the warm-up, my little war goddess?" I purred. "Wrestling? Synchronized stabbing?"
Her stance said: Try me, clown.
I chuckled. "Skipping foreplay. Got it."
At first, I didn't take her seriously. Just watching her, admiring. She moved like wrath wrapped in restraint, and I was half-distracted, half-dumb with it. "Don't hold back, Dollface," I teased. "I can take it."
She didn't. She lunged. A knee to my ribs, a foot grazing my cheekbone. Fast. Precise. Too damn close. "Oh, okay! Straight to attempted murder," I wheezed. "Love the enthusiasm."
I blinked behind her in a flash of violet chaos. Leaned down to her ear. "Missed me."
She elbowed me in the gut. Hard. "OW. That's my flirting lung!"
She didn't stop. Jab, jab, sweep. I flipped backward, laughing like a lunatic. "Oh, you're actually mad at me. That's hot."
Then her shadow cracked the ground. Leyla's domain. Black tendrils writhed up, sticky and hungry, wrapping my legs. "Well. Rude."
Vines tore out of the sand next, Ravina's touch. Thorned, hissing, climbing to strike. I snapped myself out of range, reappearing behind her with a grin. She didn't flinch. Just kept swinging. I tapped her shoulder mid-dodge, taunting. "What's the plan here, love- ACK—"
She clipped my ribs. I wheezed again. "Right. You do have a plan. Proud of you."
More shadows. More vines. She hurled a dagger of darkness straight at my face. I ducked... barely. "Whoa! Rude. Shoulder dropped, though, 9 out of 10-" She threw two more. I gasped. "Ten out of ten! There she is!"
She vanished. I froze. "Wait—"
She reappeared above me and dropped like divine judgment. Impact rattled my teeth. I barely blocked. Chaos sparked around us.
She wasn't playing anymore. By the gods, she wasn't alone. Every rune, every shard of power she carried, woke up with her. Aerion's precision. Navir's calculation. Ravina's fury. Leyla's darkness. Vitaria's life. Something from Maximus. And my chaos. Twisted into hers. A punch to my jaw made my ears ring. I staggered, laughing, blood in my mouth. "You're copying me."
Her grin was feral. Beautiful. "You thief!" I gasped. "You stole my chaos and made it prettier. How dare you."
Her answer was another strike. We collided, flame and shadow, sand exploding beneath us. She warped reality under my feet. My own trick, thrown back at me with a flourish.
WHAM.
I hit the ground hard, pinned by vines, shadows, and even my own chaos bent against me. She stood above me. Panting. Silent. Glorious. Victor. I laughed. Breathless. Bloody. Delighted. "Oh, Annie…" I groaned, grinning up at her like she'd just rewritten the scriptures. "If you were trying to awaken something in me…"
A slow, wicked grin stretched across my mouth.
"Mission. Accomplished."
A shadow slid up my chest, coiled around my throat like silk. I shivered. "Okay," I rasped, grinning even as the air tightened, "kinky. Combat scenario or… very intense audition for my fantasies?"
She landed beside me, crouched low, sweat carving a line down her cheek. Her eyes glinted like a blade catching starlight. A flick of her fingers, sharp, deliberate, and the vines constricted. I groaned. Louder than I needed to. Dramatic. Obnoxious. Absolutely unbothered. "Oh gods, tie me harder, why don't you? Bring the shadows in too. Let's make it a theme."
The shadows obeyed. Of course they did. They curled tighter around my legs, possessive, like they were smug about it. I thunked my head back against the ground and laughed like a man who deserved everything happening to him. "Valkyrie, keep this up and I'm going to start calling you 'yes, mistress.'"
She didn't smile. But her mouth twitched. Just enough. "Annie," I murmured, voice dipping low, roughened by want, "you need to understand something very important."
She raised a brow. "This is the hottest you've ever been in your entire life."
Her eyes rolled, but the vines stayed. Shadows stayed. My pulse didn't. I exhaled, letting chaos crackle under my skin like a caged storm. Barely holding. For her. "And just for the record, I was already in love with you. But now?" My voice dropped to reverent ruin. "Now I'm considering shrines. Thrones. Possibly a very private dungeon."
The vines slid higher. Tightened. I moaned on purpose. "Ohhh yes. Punish me with botany."
Her gaze flicked to my lips, then to the vines cinched across my chest. A pause. A decision. She kissed me. Hard. Fast. Ruthless. Not soft. Not a question. A command. A collision. I gasped into it, her mouth bruising, her hands dragging into my hair, her body anchoring me like gravity had finally picked a side. The vines constricted. The shadows pulsed. I kissed her back like I'd dreamed of this. While she slept on my chest, while she stole my coffee, while she broke my ribs in training and grinned about it. Her fingers slid beneath my collar, nails scraping skin. I growled into her mouth. "You have no idea what you're doing to me."
She pulled back, smirked, and mouthed: Oh yes, I do.
Then kissed me again. Slower. Worse. Better. Her hands slipped under my shirt, reverent and greedy, and I arched into her like a starving man. "I swear," I gasped, "if you use vines on me again, I'll propose."
She dragged her nails down my chest. Shadows bound my wrists above my head. I whimpered. Yes, whimpered. "Oh gods, yes. This is why we don't train more often. I'm going to develop a kink for violence."
She rolled her hips against mine. Dared me to deny it. "You already have one," she mouthed.
"Okay, fair," I panted. "But I didn't know I had this one." The vines tugged at my waistband. "Annie," I whispered, voice breaking, "this is dangerously close to me begging."
Her tongue brushed my throat.
"Okay. I'm begging. Please." She kissed her way down my chest. Slow. Intentional. Cruel in the most exquisite way. Chaos bent around her. My chaos. My signature. Except it wasn't mine anymore. It hummed under her skin like it belonged there. "Oh gods," I gasped, arching. "You're using my own reality against me."
Her mouth hovered at my stomach. Her shadows pulsed in rhythm with my heart. I looked down at her, breathless, wrecked, ruined. Hers. "I love you," I rasped. "But we're gonna need a safe word that isn't 'more.' Because it's not working."
She smiled. Bit my hip. I howled. "Yes! Marry me right now! I'll officiate it myself—" The vines slid lower. Shadows flexed like they'd learned my favorite shivers.
I was about to make an extremely inappropriate comment about plant-based intimacy when—
Alarms blared. A containment bubble wrapped around us. I dropped my head back with a groan. "I hate you."
Arbor blinked a smug obvious you're welcome. Annie didn't laugh. She didn't need to. Her eyes burned, half-lidded, blazing. Shadows throbbed with her heartbeat. The vines moved again. I swallowed hard. "Annie," I whispered, reverent and wrecked, "I really, really hope you know what you're doing."
She mouthed: I do.
Then kissed me again, slow and possessive, her body pressed into mine like a secret she was finally done keeping. My shirt vanished, ripped away like it had insulted her. I'd never been stripped like a gift before. Every god… I wanted to be opened.
The shadows wrapped tighter around my wrists. Vines slid along my thighs, curling at the waistband of my pants, curious, teasing, almost gentle. Then her hand joined them. No ceremony. No hesitation. She touched me like I belonged to her. Because I did. I arched under her, a laugh ripping out of me that turned ragged halfway through. Wrecked. "Stars, if this is divine punishment, I'll sin again."
She didn't answer. She just kissed lower, chest, stomach, slow, deliberate burns across my skin. The vines shifted, sliding beneath my hips, lifting me slightly. Like an offering. That was it. That was when clever left the building. Time went strange. Seconds stretched, minutes folded. My magic sparked uncontrolled, lighting up the chamber like fireworks behind my ribs. She moved over me like worship. Like she was rewriting my very divinity with every touch, every press of her body against mine.
I tried to speak, she silenced me with her mouth. I tried to move, the vines refused. I tried to remember I was the god of chaos. I forgot. Because in that moment, I wasn't a god. I was hers.
When she finally sank down onto me, the world didn't explode. It aligned. She was always perfect. So tight and wet. Her hands braced on my chest, her breath shaky but steady, her pace controlled, measured, devastatingly powerful. I watched her, head spinning, body burning, half-convinced eternity had just relocated to my bed. The shadows framed her like a crown. The vines curled up her thighs like worshippers. I moaned, raw, helpless, absolutely undone. "You are going to destroy me."
She smirked. Then rocked her hips again. Stars detonated behind my eyes. Arbor dimmed the lights. Traitor. The rhythm built in waves, vines pulsing, shadows tightening, my magic surging every time she silently moaned. Time cracked, space hummed, the world bent toward her gravity. One vine coiled around my throat. Not choking, just there. A reminder. Every exhale, it tightened. Every thrust, it loosened. She controlled my breath the way she controlled my body. Unholy chaos, I thanked her for it.
I was unraveling. Completely. She was watching. Like it pleased her. Like she was proud of the ruin she'd made. When we came together, breathless and burning, the vines bloomed, flowers, wild and chaotic, bursting open in a shockwave of gold and violet light.
Still, she didn't let go. She stayed pressed to me, forehead to forehead, eyes locked. No words. Just knowing. Her hand brushed down my chest, gentle now, smoothing the edges she'd carved raw. "You okay?" she mouthed.
I blinked, dazed, ruined. "I can see eternity." She raised a brow. "It looks like your thighs."
Her laugh, silent, shaking through both of us, felt like mercy. The vines curled around us, nest-like. Magic still hummed in the air, lazy now, exhaling. I lay flat, chest heaving like I'd survived a war, wrists still bound, hair an absolute disaster. She was draped over me, cheek against my neck, exhaling like she'd just exorcised a demon through chaos and sex. She looked at peace. I looked like I'd seen god, and she'd tied me up. Which was… accurate.
I blinked at the ceiling. The vines pulsed smugly overhead. "Okay," I croaked. "So that happened."
She hummed, satisfied, still touching me like I was hers. "I mean, I knew you were hot," I rambled, "but I didn't know you were shatter-my-spine-with-botany and bend-space-time-around-my-soul hot."
No response. Just another hum. Another stroke of her hand down my ribs. Which made sense. She owned me now. That's how it worked. I stared into the middle distance, ruined. Legs jelly. Magic misfiring. Soul kissed into submission. I was a god. A chaos god. Yet, somehow, I'd just been spiritually, physically, and probably anatomically dominated by a woman who couldn't even speak out loud.
"Annie."
She lifted her head, brow arched. I looked at her, all glowing, dangerous, wrecking me with every smirk, and whispered, "I'm going to need a minute to reprocess my entire identity."
She smirked. My heart did that stupid thing again. I trailed a finger down her arm. "You broke me." She nodded. "On purpose." Another nod. "I'm not even mad." She shrugged, utterly unbothered, and tucked herself closer. The vines hugged us tighter, smug little bastards. "Gods," I sighed dramatically, "this is going to ruin me. I'm going to start asking to be choked during training. Arbor's going to judge me. My enemies are going to find out." She rolled her eyes. I leaned to her ear, whispering against her skin, "…My worshipers are going to be so confused."
Her laugh, silent, trembling against my ribs, was the best sound I'd ever not heard. "I mean it," I whispered. "I can't go back to normal now. You've officially corrupted me." She brushed my hair back, mouthed: You were already corrupted.
I grinned, teeth flashing. "Yeah. But now I'm corrupted better."