After breathing on it once, I tried my best to feel something—but no, I didn't. I breathed on it again. Still nothing. I tried again and again, but I couldn't feel anything. Maybe my senses got disrupted.
Suddenly someone screamed at me, "Stop it now! That's enough, Your Highness. I think it won't work for you this way."
My eyes were teary, but still I held it in.
Did I do something wrong? Maybe I didn't breathe properly, right? Will I have to stay in that forest for the rest of my life? Why, God!!! After letting me rise so much, why did you make me fall without even a warning? What's the point of having such a beautiful face if there's nobody to appreciate it? Where did it all go wrong?
I was going through a mental breakdown. A hand suddenly patted my shoulder and said,
"Did you forget the explanation about the book of Nicolas? He wasn't able to use any of them either, so he created something for himself, the book of Nicola's. So there's still a way. And who knows? Maybe you can do magic without even mana too. The world is mysterious—you never know. But one thing is sure: if you work, you will definitely get something. Remember, even 0.001 is still greater than 0. So don't be too down on yourself."
Even if his words may turn out to be false, they were actually somewhat calming to my heart. He then told me Shila was waiting for us, so we should head there now. I quietly followed him and
said, "Sorry, Mr. Shakya. Sorry."
He turned and gave me a smile, then continued walking.
From the entrance of the tree, I could see Shila's back. She was sitting on a small rock, looking at the horizon. After hearing our movements, she turned. Seeing me all glum, she came running toward me but didn't strike up any conversation.
I myself didn't know what to say to her. I'm a disappointment again. Like in my previous life, I'm still the same. I should have never hoped anything in the first place. What was I even thinking? Sigh!
I also saw a little bit of tears in her eyes. She must be sad and angry for forming a contract with an idiot like me. I selfishly made a contract without even thinking much about her. I should've thought it through. But even if I had, I don't think it would've made much difference—because I never had that bright a mind to catch things fast.
Suddenly, she hugged me.
"It's okay, there, there. Let it all out. I'll always be there for you."
Her words really lifted the burden off my heart. There was a sudden rush of emotion inside me, and I finally broke down in tears and cried in front of her again. I'm always showing my pathetic side before her. I know I'm weak, but I thought this time I would change a little—at least for her, the only person in this world who cares for me. So again I asked for her forgiveness saying,
"I'm sorry… again and again. Why am I always like this?"
"Because you're always a dum-dum, you know. So what? Just never give up, okay?"
"But none of the books selected me. So how am I supposed to learn magic? Without it, we won't be able to leave the forest."
"Baka (In Japanese it means idiot) no baka, is your head empty again, huh? Use that giant head of yours, will you? Did you forget that you're an elf? An elf who can live for centuries. And you have me to treat you, so don't worry. If a human scum like that so-called summoned hero can create a mana breathing technique, then you should be able to do it too. You've got all the time in the world."
Then Shila took me home. I sat on the veranda and looked at the giant banyan tree—no, I should say the Veda Tree. It really looked majestic. The yard in the middle of the house was full of tree leaves. With the gusty wind, more leaves were falling today. I think autumn is approaching. It has been months since the Choosing Day. I'm living totally dependent on Shila now. Life has become boring again, and it's really not how I imagined living.
"Shila, can't I read magical formulas? Or magical circles?"
"Even without mana, I guess you could read them. But do you even know how to read those words? I never actually taught you because you never showed much interest in studying in the first place. So I thought I'd take it slow."
I can relate with the boy. No kid in his right mind wants to study. I was like that too during my childhood too. But as an Asian boy, studying is a must—and parents expect way too much from their children. So eventually, I started to like studying a little bit.
"We can't take it slow now. If I really want to do something like that hero, I need to act first. I can't take this huge amount of time for granted."
"Look who's talking now. Huh, then let's proceed." I think she felt proud, but because of her pride, she couldn't show it. Oh Shila, what will I do with you?(～￣▽￣)～
And thus I learned how to read and write rune words and some of their culture. You could say this language is the Chinese of our world—so many words and weird pronunciations. It took me five years to master the language.
Now I'm quite proficient in it.
In the meantime, I also found out that the math here sucks. Shila was amazed at how I did multiplication, because her method was long and took ages. I think this is one of the reasons this world lags behind compared to mine. Also maybe there are so many long living species here, so they are little dumb to balance it out. Just think if science was also present here , everything would be on whole another level.
I studied and memorized a lot of magical theory. But most of their mathematical calculations were either lengthy or, in some cases, wrong. And I'm not saying this after reading just a few books. I've checked 10,000 books of magic, 5,700 on alchemy, 3,000 on summoning, and so on. You could say that due to boredom, in these 5–10 years, I completed all 10 million books in this library.
Well I have changed 90% of the theories based on my knowledge of chemistry, physics and math of my world. So with my refined theory any first circle mage would be able to use a powerful magic that will be equivalent to a 3rd class spell. And Shila also became higher spirit after going through my theories.
For example, in a magic circle, while drawing a triangle, the book says all triangles have two equal sides. That's not true at all. So, I had to change a lot of things in space magic-related books. Negative and imaginary numbers don't even exist in this world yet, and for π they're using something called Zetowa, but its value is 21/7 = 3—which isn't correct either. If Euler were here, he would've smacked the guy who wrote this book called All About Shapes. What a dumbass!!!
And that's how I started correcting all the math-magic-related books, one by one. As I read more, I came across this amazing book called Reading Stars by Nhal Sha.
This dude was close to being the Kepler of this world—he even proposed a sun-centered solar model with solid logic. He probably could've corrected the mathematical misconceptions too.
I guess people here are just scared of changing tradition. And maybe that's the main reason they've fallen behind. They need a Galileo here.
Anyway, I don't need to shine light on those who refuse to see.
I am the light—all by myself.
Hahahahahaha
Let's dig up more books now.
And for some reason, I can focus for quite a long time. One day I even focused on a magic circle for 3 days. Can you believe that? But I think I could've lasted longer.
If my mom were here, she would've said the words I always longed to hear:
"Son, stop studying, that's enough."
And I would've been like, "What's your problem? Didn't you always want me to study? So why are you stopping me?" (pitifully)
Hahaha.
And this body doesn't need much rest or food either. It produces less waste, so hardly any bathroom problems. And since Shila is taking care of my muscles, she sometimes manages my food and sanitary needs with magic too. It's like—
"I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world,
Life is plastic, it's fantastic~"
All the protagonists in manga—look, this is how you live a slow and steady life.
After much thought, I really feel the lack of math in this world. I was a math major in my former life. But I've been out of practice for a while now, so I've forgotten a lot of things. With this new super focus ability, restoring my math memory will be a piece of cake. And maybe I'll find something new too in this field.
"Shila… Shila… Where are you? Come here fast!"
"What happened, you mongrel? Why are you shouting like an annoying crow? Did you see a dead body or what?" She came running while cursing me.
"Look, I'm going to start some serious research today after the meal. And while working, I don't want to lose focus. So please make sure nobody disturbs me. And also take care of all the… you know… body stuff too."
"Who do you think you're ordering around, you worthless brat? And who's there to disturb you anyway? Just do your damn work. Hmph!"
She then went upstairs and came back again. "Here, take this. This is a never-ending scroll. I think this piece of crap will be useful to you. And I'll also see how you do, Hmph!!!"
"Thank you for everything."
I think she got flustered a little. Her cheeks were red after hearing my thanks. Then she gave me an angry glare and went upstairs like a gust of wind.
I started my writings... I went through algebra, vector, calculus, numbers, geometry—well, I went through almost all the traditional mathematical branches. For modern mathematical branches like cryptography and coding, I wasn't able to do much because of the lack of modern equipment. I also solved some of the Millennium Problems too.
I even found 10,000 perfect numbers thanks to magic. Well, after studying geometry at an extremely high level, I was able to create a new breathing technique too. And so, finally, I connected math with magic.
Because of this, I also discovered a WHITE HOLE ( opposite of black whole where time is suppose to flow in reverse) through physics and magical space study—something even Earth's scientists weren't able to find. And that's how I ended my super focus.
I looked around. The library looked the same. I guess I may have only been focused for some months... or maybe—well, I don't think it's possible—but maybe a year has passed. Hehe, fingers crossed.
I should find Shila to check the date. So, I went to find her.
Suddenly, I felt a chill. Everything around me became dark. I sensed something powerful. It felt like dense energy was disturbing the space. You could say that a dense energy approached me, and because of that, the space bent and everything became dark.
Then I transformed this dense energy into matter, and space returned to normal again.
Then someone whispered:
"You can't live anymore.
After this, I am sure that you need to die. 死ね(sine, in Japanese it means die! )!!!"