Cohen's antics were making Harry feel like a Basilisk was crawling around in his stomach. "What is it already—just tell us—" Harry kept pestering him on the way back to the Gryffindor common room.
"We have Defence Against the Dark Arts class the day after tomorrow, don't we? It wouldn't be any fun if I just told you now," Cohen said, not giving anything away. "It's going to be brilliant—you can borrow a camera from Colin to get a good picture."
"So we still have to go to detention tomorrow?" Harry asked.
"No, you won't have to go anymore," Cohen raised his eyebrows. "In fact, you won't be able to see her anywhere but her own classroom from now on."
"Why? Did you put a curse on her?" Harry asked, intrigued. "But won't the Ministry come looking for you...?"
"Do I seem like the type of person who'd do something that crude?" Cohen said, lifting an eyebrow. "No curses involved."
Though, in reality, maybe a little...
Cohen had used a touch of a liquid curse when destroying Umbridge's original body because it was a lot faster and cleaner. A Blasting Curse or the Killing Curse would be too obvious and leave a magical trail. When Umbridge woke up from her stupor, she would likely believe she had just had a terrible nightmare, right up until she realized she had been turned completely into a Muggle...
When they reached the eighth floor, they happened to run into Mr. Crouch, who was just leaving the Headmaster's office.
"Mr. Crouch? I thought you were going to..." Harry asked, surprised. Hadn't Mr. Crouch said he was heading back to finish a report? Why was he still at school?
"I was discussing interview topics with Dumbledore for the Daily Prophet," Mr. Crouch said meticulously. "Your detention is over?"
Harry's eyes darted away. Their detention was supposed to last until at least nine o'clock, but they had gotten out just after six.
"Good, that saves me the trouble of going back to Dolores's office to find you," Mr. Crouch said. "Cohen, Dumbledore wants to speak with you in his office."
"Alright," Cohen said.
Harry felt a pang of disappointment. Ever since he had witnessed Voldemort's return last year, Dumbledore hadn't said a single word to him all summer.
"Well, I'm going to head back then and see how Hermione's studies are coming along," Harry said, pretending everything was fine.
---
Cohen arrived at the Headmaster's office. The stone gargoyle muttered something as usual and leaped aside.
"Knock, knock."
"Come in, Cohen," Dumbledore's voice sounded weary.
Cohen pushed the door open and walked inside.
"It's been a busy term, hasn't it?" Dumbledore said with a small smile from behind his desk.
"Not really. I copy all my homework, and I daydream through all my classes," Cohen replied.
"Minerva told me you and Harry had a bit of a disagreement with Dolores during class," Dumbledore said. "Is your detention over?"
"It is," Cohen said. "Honestly, couldn't you find any other Defence Against the Dark Arts professor? We have our O.W.L.s this year. You, as a Headmaster, don't seem to care at all about the students' pass rates..."
"That is my fault," Dumbledore looked a little older. "When you get to be my age, it's difficult to keep track of everything..."
"Harry wants to know why you won't talk to him," Cohen said bluntly. "He's going to go mad with worry—everyone thinks he's a liar, and you're avoiding him. He keeps having nightmares about Voldemort, and if I hadn't spread the news about the Dementors defecting to take some of the pressure off, he'd be going crazy by now."
Dumbledore didn't say anything for a while. After a moment, he sighed. "I'm glad you're there for him, as a friend, through this difficult time. But I can't have too much contact with him right now—I'm worried..."
"You're worried that Voldemort will realize the connection between you and Harry and use that as your weakness," Cohen finished for him. "I'm not asking you about that. I'm asking you what I should tell Harry. You can't just brush him off with 'I'm busy' for a whole year."
"Perhaps that's all I can do," Dumbledore said tiredly. "I've nearly forgotten what it's like to be a young person, but without a doubt, until we know for sure whether there is a conscious link between Voldemort and Harry, this is a necessary precaution..."
"Got it. I'll just tell Harry you're dead from exhaustion," Cohen said, nodding in sudden understanding.
"I wouldn't go that far..." Dumbledore chuckled softly. "Regarding the Daily Prophet's interview with Dolores, what time do you think would be appropriate for them to visit the school?"
"Are you and I arranging this?" Cohen raised an eyebrow.
"As Headmaster, I can certainly set the rules for outside visitors," a glimmer of light sparkled in Dumbledore's azure eyes.
"The third and fourth periods, the day after tomorrow," Cohen said.
"Very well."
---
Dumbledore probably knew something, but it didn't seem possible. There were no Hogwarts portraits in Umbridge's office. So, Cohen decided that Dumbledore's sudden statements were just a case of "Dumbledore's Gut Feeling," as he often said he had a mysterious intuition.
When he returned to the common room, Cohen ran into a very excited Hermione pacing by the entrance, with Ron and Harry looking thoroughly worn out.
"Cohen! The Goat says he can teach us everything!" Hermione said, beaming. "I told him about the spells I found, and he knows all of them!" Hermione had intentionally used "he" so that it sounded to anyone else in the common room like she was talking about a man with the nickname "The Goat."
"That'll save a lot of trouble," Cohen said. "But I think we won't have to worry about the lessons in a few days..."
"We really don't have to worry about it," Hermione said, overjoyed. "We'll learn a bit, then we'll start a study group and teach the other students..."
"Hermione, how can you be sure we'll even be able to learn it?" Ron interrupted, looking frustrated. "And no one's going to want to learn Defence Against the Dark Arts from us. We're still just students."
"Right, right," Harry said, nodding repeatedly.
"Don't be daft," Hermione shook her head. "Maybe people wouldn't listen to me, but Harry and Cohen are different, aren't they? They're Triwizard Champions, they've defeated two Basilisks, and they've faced You-Know-Who multiple times—Harry even escaped him..."
"I think you've got that backwards," Ron said with a yawn.
"They still think I'm a liar," Harry said. "And the rumors are saying that Cohen is a Dementor in human form—I think they'll be running away from us."
"What I mean is...we'll probably have a new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher in a few days," Cohen said. "Or maybe a week. Either way, it'll be very soon."