"Celesteela, a Pokémon that emerged from an Ultra Wormhole."
"Met in the nature preserve."
"Extremely timid and socially anxious."
"Likes sweet flavors, dislikes spicy."
"Frequently engages in wild imaginings."
——
"Here you are, Challenger. I'm the Gate Boss of Area 1, Abidos. I'm a Pokémon Breeder!"
"Let me see your stren—"
Before the opening line even finished, a blast of searing light erupted!
A steel bug bristling like an iron war-engine, a cannon mounted on its back—one shot melted all three of Abidos's Pokémon. As darkness closed in, Abidos dimly sensed something thump his face…
Splat!
Gimmighoul had already started its auto-loot routine; even Walking Wake and Archaludon couldn't resist and joined the spoils-scavenging.
"Back, all of you. They're normal Trainers. Taking other people's stuff is theft!"
"And besides—what ancient coins would a Breeder be carrying? What do you think Breeders are?!"
"Cooool~"
"Okay, I've used Happy Hour. It kicks in at the payout. We'll use that money to buy you some antiques later—ah! Walking Wake, Archaludon, stop gnawing the pillars!"
Through the blur of consciousness, the Pokémon rummaging over his body seemed to disperse. Abidos shed a humiliated tear and passed out in peace.
———
[bzzzt …do you read me? This is the Gate Boss of Area 2, I'm Cassandra!]
[Upper-area Gate Bosses, this is an emergency!]
[A newcomer with a giant bug, a rocket, and a treasure chest is rushing toward your sectors!]
[One hit. Everyone's going down in a single hit!]
[This is the Gate Boss of Area 3—Zagreb. Unfortunately, I've been defeated too… Upper areas, do your best!]
[The moment it started, I surrendered after one strike. I've never seen a Trainer like that!]
Bang!
"Things really took a sharp turn!"
"Is that newcomer really that strong?"
[bzzzt Area 4 here—Gate Boss Tatar—sorry, I also…]
In Area 8, Giovanni adjusted the brim of his black wide-brim hat as reports came in from floor after floor.
"Hmph. So the kid has arrived."
"That pace of breaking through… Only that speed was worth my long wait."
"Boring training time is finally ending. Hurry and come up."
Much as he wanted to fight right away, the Black Tower's rules still had to be obeyed.
The whole scene felt uncannily like when Red stormed Team Rocket…
So, kid—are you the next Red?
[Gate Boss of Area 5 here—Nabaul. Regret to report he's already into Area 6!]
[But I noticed something odd!]
[He always finds the Gate Trainer first and snatches the key, then takes the shortest path to the Boss room!]
[That guy is the psychic who caused a stir in Black City—no doubt about it!]
Tatar: [But the Tower has anti-psychic machinery to prevent that kind of cheating. Are the dampeners malfunctioning?]
Nabaul: [There are too many kinds of psychic power… Perhaps it's—]
Giovanni (Lambert): [Destiny-sense tracking, or some form of premonition. I've seen psychics like that in far-off regions. If it's mere "intuition," machines can't stop it.]
[And once a psychic is strong enough, those devices are little more than decorations.]
[Gate Bosses 1–5 all beaten in one hit, huh?]
Abidos: [I'm at the Pokémon Center… ashamed to admit I was OHKO'd—and I saw moves I didn't even recognize… Also, one weird thing—]
Cassandra: [The prize money deducted on loss went up! System miscalculation?]
Tatar: [Did any of you see a treasure-chest monster? It danced before the battle. I suspect that Pokémon!]
Zagreb: [Yes! That one—after it danced, I felt an urge to hand over my money! Luckily I'm a Ranger and wasn't carrying much.]
Nabaul: […Who is the Gate Boss of Area 6?]
Cassandra: [The new appointee—Haru Shion! A powerful elite Trainer who once challenged Victory Road! She's also a famous idol in the BOSS Trainer Fan Club!]
Nabaul: [Please, have her uphold our honor!]
[Then have all Area 7 Trainers stall that newcomer! It breaks protocol, but he's cheating already!]
Giovanni (Lambert): [No—cheating or not, it doesn't matter.]
Nabaul: [Mr. Lambert?! That violates Black Tower rules!]
Giovanni (Lambert): [Don't be bound by dogma. Whether or not he quickly finds the Gate Trainer, he isn't breaking the core rule: "Find the Gate Trainer." That's his skill—and you certainly didn't defeat him.]
[The facts are plain. Do you think sending more rabble will stop him?]
Cassandra: [Ugh… Now the first four areas are all saying a terrifyingly strong Trainer carved through five areas in half a day. The whole Black Tower is shaking—it's already a legend!]
[They say the newcomer is unprecedentedly strong… and yes, those who battled him were all OHKO'd.]
[A cannon that fires in multiple types; a rocket-like monster that flattens anything with Heavy Slam; and that guy still has plenty of unused Poké Balls!]
Giovanni (Lambert): [Indeed. A true powerhouse isn't stopped by headcount… Heh—such a familiar sight!]
[Fight, grow stronger—that's what Pokémon Trainers seek. And this place is paradise for battle!]
[Ordinary Trainers never reach the top. How many make it to the final stage? One in ten thousand—that's the world of "geniuses."]
[Still… one thing is useful.]
[When he reaches Haru Shion's Area 6, have those BOSS Fan Club zealots "probe" a bit. Ideally they'll force him to reveal more of his team.]
A Trainer who uses a "rocket," eh?
Born for Team Rocket.
——
"Are you sure you want to be here? This is already Area 6! For a newbie, this is basically the finish line—turn back while you can."
"The areas ahead are unimaginable hell! Even an Elite Four wouldn't find it easy!"
"Then, self-intro. I'm the Gate Boss of Area 6, Haru Shion! Profession: Idol!"
The blue twin-tails idol peered at the Pokémon appearing before Hikaru, recalling what the other Gate Bosses had said.
The path-clearing iron bug; a rocket-like thing hidden in a ball; a mysterious Pokémon perched on his head that never shows itself; and the treasure chest that bounces around on the floor.
"Main force: the giant bug and the rocket… the chest… just like the intel. Hm? The chest is… dancing?"
"Sorry! I don't have any cash!"
Haru Shion's face hardened, suddenly dead-serious.
"Kidding—those are my fans' heartfelt support; I'm not handing it over!"
"Breloom, Mach Punch!"
Thud! The fierce punch slammed the box—only for it to wobble once. Gimmighoul whistled, hopped up, and finished its jig.
Happy Hour!
Hikaru had obtained that move back in Mountain Path Town. Since Gimmighoul loved money, he taught it the routine.
He didn't expect it to become "hype crew," but honestly—dancing first, then doubling prize money at payout—sounds like a curse!
Haru Shion's eyes narrowed. "No effect… Ghost type!"
"Correct, Shion-san!"
"Cooool~" Gimmighoul gave a cheeky whistle and waved bye, zipping behind Hikaru. Genesect stepped forward.
Download—activated!
(The foe's Sp. Def is lower than Def → Sp. Atk rose!)
"Lock-On!"
Genesect's eyes flared; a red targeting halo shot forth and shrank to a circular reticle that clung to the opponent.
The next attack cannot miss!
"Return, Breloom—switch! Porygon-Z!"
Haru Shion hurried to swap.
Porygon-Z, the final form of the Porygon line—or so they say. The Pokédex notes: "Additional programming was added to make it more capable; however, its behavior became bizarre." Whether this is "evolution" is debated in academia.
In competitive play, Porygon-Z's important niche includes letting Porygon2 hold an Eviolite.
"Normal-type Porygon-Z has no weaknesses other than Fighting! We've already analyzed you—your specialty is Steel!"
Porygon-Z's Download also triggered—Sp. Atk rose!
"Embargo!"
The target cannot use its held item, and the Trainer can't use items on that target either!
Haru Shion smiled, checkmate in sight. "That cannon on its back needs cartridges, right? That means it's a held item!"
"Seal the cannon, and the metal bug crumples!"
"Tri Attack!"
Her plan was to fish for secondary effects—paralysis, burn, or freeze—since Ice Beam isn't ideal into Steel.
Ice shatters on steel!
"Extreme Speed."
Genesect shifted into high-velocity flight form, blitzing past Tri Attack and smashing into the glitchy duck!
Click—Transform!
Iron Head!
That iron dome cracked into Porygon-Z's forehead; even a digital lifeform can't shrug off real-world mass. Its eyes rolled white—down!
"Ugh! So strong!" Haru Shion felt the pressure mounting. As Genesect tossed the duck aside, white light flashed in her hand.
"Back in—my partner!"
Breloom returned; a brutal Close Combat came crashing down!
Thunk!
Genesect braced—then the mushroom cap writhed!
Spore!
Even steel can "sleep" to mushroom spores—creation's quirks know no end! You could probably quell a full-blown Iron Rebellion with Spore!
"Celesteela!"
"Heavy Slam!"
The classic "one trick everywhere" line: rush in, throw Spore. Not something you see often, but worthy of an Area 6 Boss—pretty face, slightly dirty heart.
[E-eh? Me?! N-no no no no way—absolutely not!]
[A-aaaaa—m-my body's moving on its own!]
[I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to slam you! If I pancake you, the god of space will definitely hunt me down!]
[Verdict: strip all steel from my body and exile me to a lifeless planet—that would be justice—I'm Celesteela, a wicked woman who ambushes others with my sinful hull!]
[…I'm such an idiot!]
Breloom didn't understand alienese. Wham—999 kg of ojō-sama fell like a meteor. Instant paste.
Breloom fainted!
Mutter all you want—I can't hear you!
Beast Boost triggered! (Highest stat: Sp. Atk → rose!)
Haru Shion turned pale. "You're kidding—something that big?!"
Only now did she realize the "rocket" her colleagues mentioned wasn't a metaphor—it was… literal.
Ugh—supposed to scout the rest of his team… I'm an idol of the BOSS Fan Club—how can I lose to a newbie here?
"I'm an idol—don't underestimate idols! Haa… Normally if I can't win, I'd just forfeit, but sorry—today I'm on a mission."
"No matter what, I need to force out… your third Pokémon!"
Obviously it wouldn't be the coin-grubbing chest, nor the invisible one on his head.
He still had balls—many balls. Which one?
The rocket-princess towering before her was an ironclad fortress. Breaking through looked hopeless…
"Good thing I'm not weak to Fire." Haru Shion pressed her lips and threw her last ball.
"Armaldo!"
A blue, armored shellfish Pokémon, body plated in rugged carapace—solid as they come.
Yellow patterns traced jaws, wing edges, and belly; red dots gleamed from a black patch atop its head; narrow eyes set to the sides—an armored, kaiju-like trilobite.
A fossil Pokémon, of course!
Hikaru: "By typing, by power, by size—this is a losing match-up for you."
Haru Shion: "If that's what you think—you're dead wrong!"
"Smack Down!"
"Graaah!" Armaldo's claws hurled a slab of rock with savage force!
The boulder struck Celesteela—who didn't even flinch.
[U-um… I used a warm, cozy Iron Defense… for your stone…]
"Graaah!" Armaldo roared, driving razor claws into the floor!
Earthquake!
[W-waaah—what is this?!]
[It hurts! Why does it still hurt after Iron Defense?!]
Ground shouldn't affect a Flying steel ojō-sama—yet Celesteela trembled all over!
The shock from her "boosters" at her feet coursed to the cone helm; she wobbled, nearly toppling!
Haru Shion: "Ground annihilates steel! When I saw that rocket silhouette, I wondered—does she float?"
"Whatever she is, you ground fliers first!"
Hikaru snapped his fingers. "Leech Seed."
Celesteela screamed while flicking a seed—the vines wrapped Armaldo!
Haru Shion blinked. "You used Leech Seed? Grass/Steel?"
Hikaru shook his head. "Wrong."
Celesteela munched a bite of Leftovers. She had no idea how it worked—only that warm energy restored her strength.
Mmm… the nourishment of this planet (leftover meteor crumbs)… It's someone else's scraps, but it still heals me.
"Heh—Archaludon's leftover meteor → Celesteela still heals. Whether it's standard Leftovers or 'meteor Leftovers,' it's all Leftovers."
"Ingrain."
Since she'd been knocked to the ground, may as well root in.
Life power welled up from the Tower floor, from Armaldo via Leech Seed, from Leftovers—pouring back into the battered iron princess, filling that scarred steel hull with vigor!
[Eheheh… so comfy… warm… HP's coming back… If I could sip some dew too… Iron Defense…]
Haru Shion grit her teeth; Celesteela sounded blissed-out.
"We can't let her keep healing—Armaldo, Earthquake!"
Hikaru: "Substitute."
Haru Shion: "Earthquake!"
Hikaru: "Protect."
Haru Shion: "Aaaaagh! Swords Dance! Earthquake, Earthquake, Earthquake!"
"Even if you blow up the entirety of Area 6, I don't care!"
She clenched her fists; Armaldo pounded the Tower floor. Whatever the Black Tower used, it was durable—but the tremors alone spooked the other Gate Bosses.
"…How fierce is Area 6 right now?!"
"Hang in there, Haru Shion! You're our idol!"
"Idols shine—they won't lose!"
"Again—Earthquake!" Haru Shion panted, sweat beading; her twintails unraveled into lake-blue hair.
Armaldo kept quaking to wear Celesteela down—but then despair struck!
Armaldo staggered—purple bubbles popped across its shell!
"Poisoned—when?!"
Why why why?! Haru Shion's mind raced.
Think—think! I'm an idol, the Area 6 Boss—so many are watching… I… I can't just…?!
Hikaru: "Celesteela, Giga Drain."
Green life force tore away; Armaldo's eyes shut, and it crashed to the floor!
[D-d-don't worry! I'm okay…!]
"Nobody asked you," Hikaru face-palmed. Lady Celesteela wasn't mocking—she was genuinely a socially anxious ditz.
She worries over who she just hit with the move she used—what a Flying/Steel kind of confidence…
Plop—Haru Shion fell on her butt, staring dazed at defeat—then her expression warped.
The Area 6 Boss burst into tears!
She wailed, years of pent-up grievance exploding in an instant.
"Uuu-waaahhhh!"
"You cheated! You totally cheesed it! This isn't a proper Pokémon battle! Who fights like that?!"
The ojō-sama swiped at her tear tracks, mortified.
"Objection!" Hikaru blurted; letting this kind of young lady cry meant the end of peace.
"Didn't you use Spore? We're even, right?"
"R-right…" Reason still lived inside the Gate Boss. Haru Shion sniffled, patting her smeared face. "Okay, then we're even~!"
"It's even, Shion-san. Thanks for the match."
Haru Shion dabbed dry her tears.
"Very well—I, Haru Shion, acknowledge your strength!"
"…"
"From today, you're also a member of the BOSS Fan Club! Approved!"
Hikaru: "Huh?"
(End of Chapter)
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