34 – What Do the Paper Rabbits Represent?
As Eric progressed through the story, Johnny's memories moved from his old age to his middle years.
Johnny was standing by River's window. By then, River was seriously ill, with a platypus plush sitting at her bedside.
And the floor was covered with paper rabbits.
"There's just enough. Even after the surgery, we'll still have just enough left… so don't worry," Johnny said to River.
But River just looked at him. "A kind lie… You think this is a kind lie, don't you?"
"No, I'm sure we'll have just enough…" Johnny tried to explain, but she cut him off.
"Stop. I don't like it when you lie."
"I've gone over our finances. I know exactly where we stand."
"Why are you trying to convince me to go against my own will?"
River looked heartbroken.
Johnny, on the other hand, was clearly worked up. "We need that money for your medical bills, River!"
"I know Anya means a lot to you, but this… this is just too much!"
"I mean, she's not even…"
River interrupted again. "Do you know what would really make me happy?"
As the conversation between River and Johnny went on, Eric—and the viewers watching his stream—finally understood what "Anya" really was.
In earlier memory fragments, it was clear from Johnny's words that Anya was something very important to River.
But no one knew what it was exactly.
At first, Eric guessed it was the platypus plushie—but now he had a new theory.
Anya wasn't the plushie. And she wasn't a person, either. She might actually be that lighthouse standing at the edge of the cliff.
And maybe River could have been saved. But instead, she insisted Johnny spend the money not on her treatment, but to fix up a house where she could look out at the lighthouse. That, she said, would make her happy.
"What the hell? Is the view of the lighthouse really more important than staying alive?"
Eric's head was spinning.
There were just too many questions swirling around in his mind.
And at that moment, in the game, River handed a paper rabbit to Johnny.
It was the one with blue and yellow colors—two shades.
"What is this?" River looked at Johnny with hopeful eyes.
Johnny was a bit surprised but answered, "It's a rabbit. Just like the ones you used to make."
"And?" River pressed him.
"And… uh…" Johnny fumbled a bit. "Well, it's made of paper."
"And?"
"Its body is yellow, and the rest is blue."
"Good. And what else?"
River was getting more and more anxious.
But Johnny had no idea what River really meant, so he changed the subject and said he had written a song he wanted to play for her.
That song was the one from earlier — "For River."
River laughed and teased him, saying the name sounded cheesy.
The memory kept moving backward. At this point, Johnny was feeling troubled.
He was stuck between two hard choices: should he use the money to treat River's illness, or keep building the house by the lighthouse — the one River had always dreamed of?
In the game, Johnny struggled with the decision. But Eric, the viewers in the livestream, and the characters Neil and Watts all knew — in the end, Johnny chose to follow River's wish.
But why did he do that!?
From Johnny's conversations with his friends Isabelle and Nicholas, we got some important clues.
Turns out, just like Eric suspected, "Anya" is the name of the lighthouse by the cliff.
That lighthouse is also where Johnny and River got married.
But it still doesn't make sense!
Why was River so obsessed with that lighthouse?
And there's another big clue from their conversations.
It seems like River might have had some kind of illness, and the paper rabbits might be a sign of it.
But why was she so fixated on that lighthouse?
And what exactly do those paper rabbits mean?
"Damn it, I really can't figure it out!" Eric's face was full of confusion.
The livestream chat was also flooding the screen.
"My monkey brain is running out of space."
"CPU overloaded!"
"What do those paper rabbits even mean?"
"This game is starting to feel real weird!"
"Hurry up, boss, move the story forward!"
"+1, I really want to know what happens next!"
Clearly, the viewers were just as curious about how the story would unfold.
They wanted answers — and wanted to see how the game would explain all these questions in the end.
As the memories kept jumping back, Johnny and River looked younger and younger.
At one point, they even shared a romantic hug under the lighthouse named Anya, both full of hope for the future.
But what confused people was that River still kept folding paper rabbits, and one day she showed Johnny a blue-and-yellow rabbit and asked, "What is this?"
She asked him the same question again later, even when she was very sick.
That only made things more confusing.
"So what does the rabbit mean!?"
"Damn it, this is driving me crazy!"
Eric was scratching his head, almost crushed by curiosity.
And then there's the question — what kind of illness did River actually have?
So many questions were stuck in his mind.
Talking more with Nicholas and Isabelle gave even more insight into River.
Apparently, Isabelle had the same illness as River.
That illness made River's speech sound strange — sometimes unclear, sometimes confusing, making it hard for people to understand what she really meant.
"So River had some kind of condition that made it hard for her to express herself and connect with others?"
Eric started guessing in his mind.
If that's the case, then all of River's strange behavior finally starts to make sense.
Why did River keep asking Johnny about rabbits? Why did she tell Johnny to throw the sandbag at Anya? Why did she even stand at the edge of the cliff, risking her life to look?
There's actually a reason for all of that.
Because River has a mental illness, she can't express her feelings clearly. So instead, she uses hints to show what she wants deep inside.
But even if we understand that, a new question comes up:
What exactly do the rabbits stand for? And why is River so obsessed with the lighthouse named Anya? Why is she willing to give up her life for it?
Is it just because that's where she and Johnny got married?
That doesn't really make sense either.
----------1---------
35: River's Illness
The whole game uses a reverse timeline structure.
Most players have already figured that out.
With all these questions in mind, the story keeps moving backward.
On the night before River and Johnny's wedding.
They were both dressed up, sitting by the lighthouse, looking at the moon and chatting.
That night, the lighthouse got its name—Anya.
Under the moonlight, River and Johnny went up to the lighthouse.
Their shadows were cast on the wall by the light.
In the moonlight, Johnny patiently taught River how to dance.
From night until morning.
A soft, gentle piano melody played as they danced, flowing like a quiet stream.
It made the whole game feel full of romance.
The game's graphics might not be top-tier,
But with the music and mood, this moment felt truly beautiful and romantic.
"Damn, they really danced all night long!"
Eric couldn't help but say that with emotion.
He had to admit, at that moment, all the confusion in his heart faded for a while.
Because at least right then, the game actually made a grown man like him feel what people call romance.
The next day came. In front of the now-named lighthouse, Anya, River and Johnny officially became husband and wife.
On the way to the wedding, River saw a little white rabbit that had been hit by a car. She looked a bit sad, and also a bit strange.
But Johnny didn't notice anything unusual.
"So… is that why River kept folding paper rabbits later on? But what's the connection?" Eric was confused.
But he couldn't figure it out.
So he kept going with the story.
Everyone at the wedding was super happy, but Eric noticed a small detail.
At the wedding, Johnny's mom called him by a different name.
In the game, Johnny's friend Nicholas also looked confused.
Johnny responded naturally, saying that it was his grandfather's name, and his mom used "Joey" as a nickname to remember him by.
"Joey? That name definitely means something," Eric squinted his eyes.
Time kept rolling back.
Now we see the period when River and Johnny were dating, before getting married.
They were at a horse ranch,
Riding horses together, laughing and having fun.
Because it was the doctor's suggestion, they thought horseback riding might help ease River's condition.
Just like most people in love, the two of them often showed affection.
And now, players finally understood what River's illness actually was, confirming their earlier guesses.
"Asperger's Syndrome, so that's what River has?" Eric finally saw the name of the condition in the notebook clues.
But he had never heard of this illness before.
He glanced at the comments in the livestream chat—clearly, everyone else was just as confused.
"People with this condition show symptoms like trouble making friends, difficulty with talking and communication, rigid behavior, and sticking to strange habits or rituals that don't make sense."
"It really matches her perfectly."
Things started to make more sense—if she really had this illness, then all of River's strange behavior could be explained.
Still, even if the behavior had a reason, the meaning behind her actions was still unclear.
At this moment, Eric was still full of curiosity.
Curious about River and Johnny.
What did the paper rabbits mean? What kind of past did River and Johnny share? Why was Johnny so set on going to the moon?
By now, Eric had been playing for almost two hours.
But there were still no answers—why Johnny wanted to go to the moon, why River would rather die than not finish the house with a view of Anya, why she kept folding paper rabbits all her life after they got married, and why she kept asking Johnny about it.
None of that had been explained yet.
The story kept moving, and now it went into Johnny's school years.
It was during this time that he met River.
And Eric noticed something—the platypus.
River always carried that plush platypus during her high school years.
It seemed to mean something important to her.
It was also how Johnny first started talking to her.
With help from his friend Nicholas, Johnny was pushed in front of River, who was sitting on the steps reading a book.
"Hi!"
"Uh… hello…"
"Can you hear me?"
Standing in front of River, Johnny looked a little awkward.
And then, finally, River replied, "Yes."
"Then why don't you… never mind… uh, this platypus is really cool." Johnny was clearly trying hard to keep the conversation going.
River just glanced at the platypus beside her, then went right back to reading.
"Uh… what are you reading?" Johnny kept trying to make small talk.
"A book."
"About platypuses?"
"No."
"Oh… uh, that's fine too, I guess."
Johnny was clearly feeling uncomfortable. River just seemed way too cold.
From the way things looked, River wasn't very likable at that time.
You could even say she was kind of distant. Even watching through a screen, you could feel just how awkward Johnny must have felt.
The whole moment was painfully quiet.
But thanks to the story being told in flashbacks, players knew this wasn't the real River.
She only acted that way because she had Asperger's.
"Lighthouse!" River suddenly spoke, cutting off Johnny mid-sentence.
"This country still has a total of sixteen secondary Fresnel lens lighthouses. Nine of them are along the coast, and one of those was actually converted from an old kerosene lighthouse."
"Oh, that's what you're reading? Well, actually... I was wondering, would you like to watch a movie with me?"
"I don't know."
"That's okay, I can wait while you think about it."
"I can't think about it."
"Why not?"
"No date, no time."
"Hmm... how about this Saturday at eight? Would that work?"
"Okay."
At this point, Eric felt a lump in his chest. It even made him feel a little heartbroken.
As a regular person, there's just no way to really understand what this feels like.
Honestly, he couldn't truly imagine how much pain River must be in.
The kind of pain where you want to say something, but your mind and body just won't let you express it.
(End of Chapter)