Cruelty was familiar in this world, but what I was about to do was worse.
"Silly wolf, I don't need a drug to have my way with you. Just a simple word, and your body will react to me." I smirked, feeling hollow as all the warmth from my body left me.
However, I could never really face Alijah head-on with what I was about to do.
No, I'm a coward.
To hide his eyes from me, I reached back to the cloth he always used to tie his hair before taking it and using it to blindfold him.
"You can't take that off until I tell you," I whispered, tightening the cloth around his head.
He released a nervous chuckle as his hair became undone because of it. For a moment, I froze, realizing what I was about to do. I could've stopped, talked to him, listened to him, heard him, but I was terrified to live a life without him.
No… a life with no one.
Everyone considered me the annoying, stupid girl they had to deal with.
Now, I'll be the terrifying one as well.
Letting go of every hesitation, I sighed softly before grabbing Alijah by his chin and tracing my thumb on his lips.
It's too late to stop. You'll never love me.
"Open your mouth so I can kiss you. Oh... and you'll respond to me similarly every time I do." I commanded.
As he did as I commanded, I clashed my lips with his as my tongue invaded his mouth. It was usually so warm whenever I touched it, but I felt disgust for myself this time. At least it was washing Cain's kiss from my lips.
Our tango continued as Alijah dug his hands into the ground when I unbuttoned his shirt. I finished the forced kiss by nibbling on his bottom lip, slightly slicing it with one of my fangs. Although they weren't as sharp as his, they still could do some damage.
Blood dripped from his wound, enticing me to lick the trail of blood and his lower lip. It healed almost immediately because it wasn't deep enough to make it stay. Part of me wanted to know what he would say in a moment like this, but I knew it would be nothing good.
No, you probably feel the same thing I did when Cain kissed me.
Every fiber felt repulsed for doing this to my wolf, yet the hollowness that had set in my heart kept me going. Once his shirt was undone, I exposed his chest to me, tracing his features with my fingertips.
None of this is mine, yet I'll claim for tonight alone. Even if I bite… all the marks will be gone by the time the sun is out.
Trailing kisses on his cheeks, I suddenly pulled down one of his ears, prompting him to breathe loudly. I leaned closer before softly blowing on it.
"I think I'll take that bite now," I murmured into Alijah's fluffy ear, tugging his shirt down enough to expose his shoulders.
Trailing kisses down his jawline, I released his ear before traveling to his shoulder. The warmth of his skin was always so alluring, yet the lingering thought of him hating my every touch revolted me.
I…
Licking the spot I would chomp down on, my wolf shivered, prompting me to draw away slightly.
Can I really do this? You'll hate me… No, you already do.
Opening my mouth, I chomped Alijah harder than I had ever done before, triggering a groan to erupt from his lips. Blood gushed into my mouth, filling my senses and leaving behind the sweetness from before in my taste buds.
A growl rose from his lips when I tugged away from the love bite I had given him. Ichor dripped down his chest from the injury, triggering me to trail my hands on it.
Ah… It's over.
It wasn't long until my lips sucked on his skin, marking everywhere I touched. I even suckled on his nobs while leaving behind slight nibbles on his areolas. Moans and groans left his lips as I made my way down to his chest.
His breathing was heavy and rapid, making his abdomen flex with each press of my lips. He was covered in all different types of love bites by the time I was done with his upper body. There, I unbuckled his pants before slightly tugging them down to see if he was responding to me.
Ah… You're… No, that doesn't mean anything. It's a physiological response rather than an emotional one.
"Wow... I never expected you to be into the dominatrix or sadistic kink, Alijah-tan." I smirked before I realized what had come out of my mouth.
Wait… didn't Mira do similar things to you?
For a moment, I stared at the marks, bites, and blood that dripped off him as he panted for air. My heart's void grew more prominent as my eyes dropped towards the ground.
I'm no better than her. I don't deserve you, even if you want me. No, all I deserve is to be killed by you.
Even though my body radiated the same darkness as in the morning, I felt everything I was doing to him. This time, it numbed nothing.
I'm not pure at all, Alijah. That flower you gave me isn't meant for me. No… It's a better gift for Lilith.
Wincing, I glanced down at my left arm to see blood had fallen from my chin into the white cloth that represented the flower.
Just what am I doing? Right... making you hate me so much that you won't leave a piece of me to be found.
Pushing aside my feelings, I exposed his member from his underwear. A soft sigh left his lips when I grabbed onto it, and he shivered soon after when I stroked it.
I'm hideous, horrible, and monstrous.
Even though I had never done this before, I pumped my wolf a bit more before I took him into my mouth. A gasp left his lips, although I didn't know if it was because of pain or something else I had done.
Unlike before, I was trying to give him some pleasure through the discomfort I had brought him. He still had his hands buried in the ground next to him as I started to bob my head carefully, not to scratch him with my teeth.
Crap, you're so big. I can barely fit you in my mouth!
The deeper I took him, the more my body rejected the idea as a gag sensation started to occur soon after.
How… How did Vera's friends say a man like it? Argh! Why can't I remember a single thing?
It was evident that I sucked, and I couldn't tell if I was hurting him or pleasing him. His hips, though, slowly bucked even through my command.
Are you doing it involuntarily? Does that mean you want me to take you deeper? But… I can't! My jaw is starting to hurt!
Unable to take him fully in, I concentrated on pumping his base and sucking on his tip. I played with his jewels with my free hand, softly caressing them in my fingertips. They were soft and wrinkly, but their warmth was alluring to me.
A slightly salty taste soon filled my senses when my tongue swirled on his tip.
Is this the liquid that nourishes your seed on the way out? It doesn't taste bad, but neither does it taste good!
Part of me wanted to see if he was pleased, but his expression was none of my concern. Saliva dripped from my lips and onto him before a loud moan left his lips as he exploded in my mouth, catching me off guard.
Thanks to the suddenness of it all, I almost choked on the thick liquid from his heat as some of it went up my nose. Unable to help it, I coughed as most of it dripped from my lips. A chuckle soon followed the event as if he got me back with that.
My eyes twitched as I had a hard time recovering from almost choking on his thick load. Once I could breathe clearly, my body moved before I realized what I was doing. My wolf couldn't fully enjoy his victory when I kissed him.
It was a dirty move, but the bond obligated him to respond to me as our tongues tangoed with what was left of him in my mouth.
A victory.
"Swallow it, my love." I snickered, wiping myself.
My wolf had no choice but to follow my order as his smile vanished before another low growl left his mouth.
"Aw... you didn't like that? But you tasted so good to me. Isn't it salty? I love salty things." I licked my lips, inspecting the wolf with rosy cheeks and saliva dripping from his lips.
Ah…. You…
Unable to help myself, I grabbed his chin before kissing him again.
I'll be… just like everyone you hate, Alijah, so please… just give me this last moment.
Straddling him, I feverously made out to him like it would be the last time I would ever kiss him.
More… I don't want it to end.
Tugging away slightly from him, I sat down on the ground in front of him before glancing up towards the starry sky above. The clouds from before had parted, allowing the celestial bodies to witness my sin.
"Hey, Alijah... do I smell sweet today?" I asked, not looking at my wolf and taking a deep breath.
I hadn't realized the entire time I had been crying.
It's not like it matters. I'm still the most pathetic person alive. Feeling bad even though I'm the one doing heinous things.
"Fuck me with the one goal of impregnating me," I ordered, closing my eyes.
Before I knew it, my back was on the ground as his body towered over me, shimmering brightly. A second later, my pants were off as shivers ran down my spine when he gripped my hips before plunging into my core without hesitation.
A sharp whine left me as the suddenness of it all hurt, yet it wasn't an unwelcome event. I didn't want any pleasure from what I was forcing him to do.
I truly don't know if I smell sweet to you, but I doubt it.
Even though I was a Lycan, females couldn't tell when other females were ovulating since only males could do it. The only thing I could do was feel the symptoms, but I hadn't felt the entire time we had spent together.
And certainly not today.
Each thrust that used to give me such warmth only left me colder than ever while I lay there like a doll being fucked. Sex without love was nothing in comparison.
Though, it never was there. It was only me ever making love to you. You… never… So… why…
When Alijah tried to knot me, I found my release along with him.
Ah… Even for women, it's a physiological response.
Even though I was doing something so dirty, I was going to feel pleasure too.
Ah... This is revolting. I'm disgusting. Utterly ugly.
"Do it again until I'm pregnant," I whispered while we were knotted.
Unable to do otherwise, he followed my command, unable to do anything else. I bit into his shirt, attempting to hold the mewls that wanted to erupt me while he fucked me repeatedly. Though, unlike me, he didn't hold on to his moans.
No, he filled my ears with them, while occasional ones would leave me whenever he knotted me. All my marks and bites were gone when the sun was up. I could barely keep up anymore, but somehow I was conscious.
The only evidence of what I did was the dried blood on his skin. I slowly glanced at the blue sky above as the stars melted into it. Air was so precious to us both that we couldn't get enough. The sunrise marked the end for us and this excursion.
When this wolf knotted me for the last time, I pressed my hand on his chest.
How we are still up, I don't know, but this is enough. I feel like I'm going to blow down there.
This would be the last time I would ever feel him like this. Unable to help myself, I kissed him lightly on his lips before wincing as I had the worst headache I had.
Damn it, it's probably from all the crying. Ah… Pathetic.
Like I had commanded the night before, he responded to the kiss with the same affection. I almost broke when I tugged away from the brief affection. It was the first time we had done so since the fucking started.
I could feel my body tremble when his heat quivered within me.
Hah… I'll never have you again, not that I deserve to after this.
All I could hope was that he gave me a quick death.
"A-After you're f-free from this knot. Y-You'll sit back where y-you were and s-stop trying to k-knock me up." I struggled to say with a raspy voice.
Alijah also struggled to get a grip as his breathing was uneven and hoarse. Once he was free of my biological response, he sat back where he had been previously before my horrendous order came to be. The moment I sat up to grab my shorts, what Alijah had filled within me slowly overflowed down my legs.
Flustered, I quickly placed my underwear, followed by the shorts, only to feel truly repulsed afterward.
How did all those women who did that to you live with it? And did it over and over nonstop for two years. I can barely handle it now.
Nausea rippled through my entire being as I felt like my stomach contents were about to exit. My legs also felt like jelly with each movement I tried to make.
This isn't good. I still need to make it back to Silverant.
I readied myself to face Alijah, who panted for air where he sat. Luckily, the blindfold still held up even after all his rough movements. Shivers ran down my body when I struggled to get up, but I eventually found my footing.
My wolf appeared to recover faster than I did, as his panting had stopped. I could only stare at him, knowing I had betrayed him in every way possible.
All my promises are meaningless.
I removed the scrunchy he had given me and placed it before him as I kneeled to his level.
"Hey… Alijah… forget the kissing order." I whispered, voice hoarse.
Slowly, I leaned to press my lips against his before holding them there in a futile attempt to calm my shattered heart.
I'm sorry… for everything.
Pulling away from his lips, I could only gravitate toward them.
I don't want to let go.
"You respond however you want. I kiss you this time, but you can't move or speak," I mumbled, though he could hear me.
You'll probably bite my tongue off or make me bleed, but I can't care less.
Pressing my lips on his again, I flinched away when he opened his mouth. A soft chuckle left him as I pushed past my fears and kissed him again. This time, I stuck my tongue into his mouth, expecting a bite to follow, but his soft, spongy muscle tangoed with mine.
This sweet wolf…
However, I couldn't allow myself to be swayed. He would never hurt the master who owned his leash until the orders expired. Enjoying the last kiss we would ever share, I tried to figure out how to get back to Lilith.
Well, without my wolf getting to me first. I deserve everything that's coming for me, but… Let me at least free you from this bond.
Pulling away from him, I bit into my lip.
This is it. I'm sorry, Alijah.
"Fix yourself up and stay here for an hour. After that, you'll be free of my worders." I gave my last order, taking a step away from him.
I'm sorry. Please make me suffer for what I've done to you. Make my death as painful as you want, as long as you leave not a piece of me behind.
Part of me wished I could stay there and wait for my reckoning, but I needed to find Lilith before I took off this bracelet. With her around, he wouldn't do anything too reckless, or at least I hoped he wouldn't. Without a second thought, I bolted out of there and into where fates would collide yet again.