In the Los Angeles Chinese Grand Theatre, Noel kept yawning, struggling to stay awake.
After attending the premiere of Batman: Begins in Chicago, Noel, out of trust and admiration for the Elf Prince Legolas, had come to Los Angeles for the premiere of Kingdom of Heaven.
But he was deeply disappointed. Before even a quarter of the film had played, Noel was yawning incessantly.
The movie felt like a lullaby, seemingly designed to lull him into a peaceful slumber in the theater.
If this were merely a matter of personal taste, it might be excusable, but glancing around, the audience seemed just as disengaged. Some were already asleep, others focused only on their soda and popcorn, or whispering quietly, paying no attention to the film itself.
Noel was an experienced moviegoer, having watched epic films like The Lord of the Rings trilogy, King Arthur, Troy, and Alexander the Great.
Among these, only Troy had moments where Brad Pitt and Orlando Bloom's handsome faces could somewhat compensate for the film's shortcomings, and the female lead Diane Kruger looked sufficiently sexy and attractive.
The rest of the films could be aptly described with a single word: terrible. Utterly terrible.
Kingdom of Heaven appeared no better. The editing was chaotic, the main storyline unclear, and Orlando Bloom's performance seemed playful, almost like child's play.
Noel noticed echoes of The Lord of the Rings trilogy throughout the film. That was somewhat understandable; after the success of the trilogy, all epic films tried to emulate it.
However, these films rarely captured the essence. For instance, the Battle of Pelennor Fields in The Return of the King was thrilling, and King Théoden's pre-battle rally remains one of cinema's most exhilarating sequences.
Alexander the Great had attempted something similar, yet it failed to captivate, eliciting only criticism.
Kingdom of Heaven attempted similar scenes, yet Noel only felt sleepy. He didn't care who charged ahead; he certainly wouldn't move.
Sitting in front, Ridley Scott could hear the audience behind whispering. Many of the big-scale, exciting sequences that 20th Century Fox promised simply didn't occur.
Ridley Scott knew what a premiere turnout should be like. Even if it wasn't the first screening, audiences had spontaneously given applause and cheers during The Lord of the Rings trilogy.
But now, even the basic premiere etiquette was ignored, proving just how dull the film truly was, making viewers drowsy.
Scott placed all the blame on 20th Century Fox executives—they had ruined the film.
Had he held the final cut, the result would have been completely different.
Yet deep down, Scott had to painfully admit that in the epic film genre, few directors could rival Gilbert, including himself.
Since it was painful, Noel decided to end his suffering and exit.
"Excuse me, I'm stepping out," Noel told the person next to him.
"Are you going to the restroom?" the person asked.
"I'm leaving the screening."
"I'll leave too!"
It seemed the film was indeed boring. Once someone led the way, others couldn't hold back and ended the torment.
Outside, Noel breathed a sigh of relief and chatted with the fellow viewer who left with him. "I think Ridley Scott is better suited for sci-fi. Epic films like this aren't his strength."
The other viewer agreed. "Yes, compared to Gilbert's versatility, Scott is far behind.
Anyway, I'm Paul. You?"
"Noel," he replied.
They shook hands. Paul said, "I'm heading to a bar for a drink. Want to join?"
"No," Noel waved his movie ticket. "The midnight screening of Batman: Begins is about to start. I'm waiting for it."
Paul suddenly remembered Gilbert's new film release. "Ah, then no time to waste. I'll check if there are any tickets left."
The two parted at the theater entrance, and they weren't alone—many audience members left early, ending a grueling viewing experience.
Some fans later posted online: "Orlando Bloom's acting was absolutely terrible. Didn't he do well in Gilbert's films before?"
"Since leaving Gilbert, Orlando Bloom's performances have worsened each time. He's still suited for roles like Legolas. Under Gilbert's guidance, he could play characters like Will, but he cannot carry a film alone.
In Kingdom of Heaven, his performance makes it feel like The Sorrows of Young Werther."
"Honestly, even without comparing it to The Lord of the Rings trilogy, this film is a textbook example of a bad movie."
"At first, I had no hope for Batman:Begins , considering it's a series that had died once. But now I'm full of confidence—Ridley Scott simply cannot compete with Gilbert."
The early exits at the Kingdom of Heaven premiere inevitably reached Warner Bros.
Doug Walter, CEO of Warner Bros., almost laughed out loud. "This is absolutely great news for us."
His assistant suggested, "Sir, we could mobilize the media and hype the film's poor quality, letting the audience know it's a bad movie."
"Of course," Doug Walter agreed. "Notify the team and call an executive meeting. We'll dig a hole and throw Kingdom of Heaven straight into it.
By the way, Gilbert should already be on his way back, right?"
"Yes, he should arrive in Los Angeles around 2 a.m., just about when the midnight screening ends," the assistant replied.
"Excellent," Doug Walter nodded. "As soon as the midnight box office numbers are in, send Gilbert a copy immediately."
"Understood, sir."
The events at the premiere seemed to foreshadow a bleak outlook for the film. Executives at 20th Century Fox had also heard about the early exits but still clung to a shred of hope.
They reasoned that perhaps the fans who left early weren't the film's target audience, and that once released, the film would naturally attract its proper viewers.
However, the executives failed to realize that the fans attending the premiere were precisely the target audience for this genre.
If the film couldn't win over its own type of audience, where else would it find new viewers?
Thus, Kingdom of Heaven, unaware of its impending struggles, was pushed into the market by 20th Century Fox like a lone warrior.
And it faced the resurrected superhero film series: Batman:Begins.
Before the premiere, most media outlets assumed Kingdom of Heaven would easily surpass the Batman Begins.
After all, epic films had been incredibly popular over the past two years, and the Batman series had been dormant for seven years.
Even if Gilbert aimed to revive the series, it seemed it would require tremendous effort.
Yet unexpectedly, after just one premiere, the tides completely turned. No one now believed Kingdom of Heaven could challenge the Batman Begins, since even at its worst, it wouldn't measure up.
Moreover, Gilbert's work always came with a guarantee. Even the Batman films, judging from the premiere and test screening reactions, had been solid.
With that, the outcome was already clear.
.....
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