WebNovels

Chapter 5 - If you ain't cheating...

"Take him for questioning!" Oh great, Daddy issues is, of course. The arrest first, ask questions later type. Lee adjusts the guitar in his hands... He just finished stringing the thing. Time for logic. Spears are coming in first, Bender will stay in mid-range. Following this, he slowly circled back until the view between him and the bender was blocked. NOW!

"Think fast chuckle-nuts!" From behind the guitar Lee pulled one of the weights from his inventory, underhand blind throwing it at one of spear-men. Now while it wasn't intentional... the weight, obviously, had weight to it. Lee had aimed for the chest. With the intention of the surprise weight knocking them back a few steps to deal with later... He forgot to calculate drop. Which was actually very fortunate for him, extremely unfortunate for the male target. As the weight went... south of the border.

None of the men could tell what sounded worse. The armor breaking, the thud of the metal against cloth... the sharp wheeze as the fellow jewel bearer crumbled to their knees. Lee wasn't concerned about that as he hefted the guitar overhead, smashing it over the head of the second spear-man. "Bonk!" Weeks of collective work... fucked. He'll cry about it later. Now, while the current spearman was blinded, possibly concussed and certainly discombobulated, he rushed to the Bender.

You know what works surprisingly well against martial arts? Random Bullshit. There is a flow between 2 martial combatants. Like a highspeed game of Pokémon, Your opponent chooses a move, then you choose a move. Random Bullshit? Imagine you walk into tall grass and an estus chugging fat rolling fiend came out of nowhere to give you the Randy Orton treatment. In traditional martial arts, close range?... Worst place to be. In bending? 2nd best place to be. The over-reliance on the mid-range ability of bending left a glaring weakness to up close attack. "...Huh, guess all that MMA watching was actually helpful." 

It's surprisingly easy to tear apart an amateur bender when you're in their bubble. Take their lead arm, force it away, disrupt their balance and bring them to your level. Then rapid punch the shit out of them. Also easy to do once you knock their helmet off. Right-cross, get them with an elbow to the temple on the cock-back and repeat until limp. Can't get too cocky... these are bottom of the barrel fighters. Soldiers that wouldn't be missed on the battlefield. Have to be, to be given to a banished Prince as their entourage. 

Zuko: "What kind of warrior fights like this!? Where is your pride? Where is your Honor!?"

Lee had to pause for a moment and decided it was best after he grabbed the neck of the now broken guitar and spinning the the stumbling man and pushing them over their fallen spear brother... who may now be a spear sister. "Honor? Honor my ASS! You sent 3 dudes to arrest me for existing in a place! This isn't a duel, it's survival. If you ain't cheatin' you ain't trying." He should have worded that better... going by the furious teen hurling a decent size fireball at him, he had pushed a button. "SHIT!"

You know what works unsurprisingly well against random bullshit? Better martial arts. Lee got a front row seat that his 'weak to close range' thought process for benders was a very outdated and stupid view. Zuko's initial fire ball was a mere distraction, one he used to boost himself forward and into Lee's personal space. All he really had going for him in this fight was trained evasion and better than decent recovery when he did get tripped up. 

Sadly that seemed to further fuel the other teens rage. Forcing Lee to effectively breakdance away from the repeated attacks. As this was going on, a random small thought hit both of the young men. 'Why isn't Iroh joining in?' An unspoken accord was struck as they both glanced at the elder. Who was currently distracted by petting Puffs' fur... of course. Still gift horses and mouths and some such. Lee used his low position to sweep while shooting a jet of flame, forcing Zuko to retreat and to maintain the distance he transitioned into a Windmill, twin jets of flame in a wild display of fire bending.

{Shinra Style: Blazing Windmill} 

-Was that the single cringiest thing he had ever thought? Possibly, definitely top three. Thank what ever deity sent him here that he didn't actually say that out loud. The weeb inside may be loud, but that doesn't mean he had to listen.

Finally he backflipped back onto his feet and into a basic boxing stance... only to be confused by the also confused faces looking back at him. "What?"

"You're a fire bender?"

"Uhh... Yes?"

"But you look water tri- Are you the Avatar?"

"Nope. Only fire... here we go..."

"LIES! You're coming back to the Fire nation with me, I must reclaim my Honor."

"... nah." Lee got out of his fighting stance now determined to try and talk his way out after a lull in the fight began. "Look eggboy,-"

"Eggboy!?"

"Names would help. Hi, I'm Lee. Yes, I'm a Fire bender. No, I'm not the Avatar. I tested that. I'm just an orphan who due to their ancestry isn't very welcome wherever they go. You can imagine and now know that a non-water bending water native, can take you for a bit of a loop. My best guess is that a fire nation man got... oof, that's a bad way to phrase that. Uhh, Look, I was raised by a single mother and she was not happy with the father, we'll leave it there." It was a bullshit story, made up on the spot. But just vague and awkward enough to dissuade more questions.

"Zuko... I believe it's best we rest this point. Think about it, what are the odds we'd find The Avatar literally in the first place we look?"

"He still assaulted Fire Nation soldiers."

"I would argue that you failed to identify yourselves and approached a stranger in an attempt to detain them off of Fire nation soil. Self defense is the expected response... I Am sorry about that nut shot though... I was aiming for the chest."

They all spared a glance at the man on the ground, escaping the pain through near unconsciousness. Going by the whimpers.

"What did you throw at him anyway?"

"Training weight."

"It can't be that-" Zuko had gone over to the fallen man and attempted to heft the piece of metal from the ground. It was a surprising struggle for the exiled prince. Having to use both hands to lift it to their chest. "WHAT IS THIS MADE OF!?" 

"Hell if i know, I found it around here." Shaking his sleeve to magically drop the other weight from his magic inventory, Iroh flinching from the solid thud it made against the ground. "So...Tea?"

"Best thing I've heard all day."

There is no better Bulldozer than Iroh when it comes to tea. Taking the wind from Zuko's sails as he follows Lee to a nice spot for tea and conversation.

===

"This is called Matcha right? I've never had a tea like this before! It's fantastic."

"It's actually what got me into tea myself. I usually put it in cold milk on a hot day, that or chai."

Zuko sat frustrated as he watched his uncle fraternize over hot leaf juice with the enemy... at worst. Eccentric undocumented stranger at best. This 'Lee' took the time to guide the soldiers to a good place to recover and gave a little micro tour of the temple he took over. Even the exiled Price had to admit... If Lee truly did this alone, he's doing well for himself and surprisingly smart. The cat is also very soft.

"I'm just surprised you're making alcohol all the way up here. The sourcing for the fruits must have been a pain, not even to mention your age."

(OH shit, I'm alive... and sorry. For just kinda falling off the world. But you know life. Gotta work a job to pay for the ability to do this. But I also recently said FUCK THIS. Quit, and moved to a new country to be a baker. I may come back to the US of A when the Tangerine in a toupee either croaks or goes to jail. For now tho. I plan on rewriting this and actually going past 4 chapters.

Same Protagonist, probably gonna be a different starting world. *I'M thinking Wakfu, it's criminal that there's only 8 results under Fanfic here.* But to the like... 2 of you that see this. Now is the time for recommendations. Powers, starting worlds or future worlds. ANYTHING. I'm here, I'm baking bread and feel way better about living my life.)

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