The swirling gray clouds, like servants chained to their master, forever frozen in their circular dance, humbly glided around the pike, unable to leave the mountain.
The line, reflecting the sky-lilac shades, succumbed neither to the charms of the playful wind nor to the appealing expanses of the endless sky, continuing its uniform procession around the peak. The view was breathtaking. What from the heights of the foothills looked like a messy stack of clouds, provoked completely different sensations when being observed from the top.
Hao Ning, trying not to go close to the edge, stared at the heavenly waves separating the spirit world from the unattainable edge. Now he understood why the Gates remained forbidden. The hem of the hanfu fluttered in the wind, and the skin crackled from the energy filling the air. Hao Ning looked at his recovered hand and slightly moved his fingers. This world managed to amaze him again.
Familiar footsteps were heard nearby. Wei Huan stopped to the side, glancing at the stream moving below. Although the man showed no emotion, his noticeable excitement did not escape Hao Ning's eye. Even though he reached the top not because of his stubbornness or desire for justice, he still ended up at the place he was so eager to get.
He had to wait several centuries; find the strength to move on despite guilt and anger; to meet a person who turned his entire existence upside down and still achieved his goal.
– Finally, the Gates, – quoth Wei Huan.
Enchanting flashes were reflected in the deep darkness of his eyes. Hao Ning did not have time to find the right words in time. Wu Zhe Kai was the first to respond.
– You mean the clouds? They are the Gates? – wondered the healer in disbelief. – Not a mountain? Not just some cave in it, but some clumps of steam? – he rolled his eyes. – Why is it always something unsafe?
Hao Ning smiled slightly, turning his head towards his friend. He kept his distance from the edge, not risking approaching even to satisfy his curiosity.
– Yet it completely corresponds to this World.
Zhe Kai snorted in agreement, looking around and awkwardly pulling on his hanfu sleeves. The peak of the mountain did not stand out in any way except for the abundance of cracks and the greenery that covered it. It would have been an average mountain but for the knowledge that one step beyond its edge separated two worlds from each other.
– Where did the Guardian go? – Wu Zhe Kai muttered again, rubbing his shoulders with his palms.
It was not cold at the top of the peak. The wind caressed with warm currents, but the healer felt extremely uncomfortable, wanting to get away from the place as soon as possible, which was beyond the understanding of a common man.
– He said to wait here, – Hao Ning looked at the curling clouds again. – Maybe they are checking us?
– I'm afraid to upset his expectations, but I'm not going to jump, – Wu Zhe Kai sat down on the rock. – The desire to be reborn still lingers within me. I need, – the healer's voice trembled, but he forced himself to finish, – to find someone, to express everything that I think about him. And make sure he's doing well.
Wei Huan glanced at Wu Zhe Kai, but then looked away and smiled calmly, supporting that impulse. The man's palm was tightly clenched, and the other's warmth pleasantly warmed his shoulder. Hao Ning pressed himself against Huan's side, trying not to look the man in the eyes. Even now he could detect the slightest changes in the general's mood, although he was the one who needed support.
– A-Ning, I'm here for you.
– And I'm for you.
The tender words were drowned in a sharp gust of wind that fleetingly caressed the gathered people and disappeared into the clouds crackling with energy. Shimmering blue sparks intertwined with gusty lilac flashes, enchanting with the play of light and alluring with a forbidden illusion.
Wei Huan and Hao Ning turned to look at the Guardian who had once again appeared before them. He, like a cloud separated from the main mass, was floating above the ground, barely touching it with the ends of the long snow-white ribbons of his robes.
Nothing had changed in the image of the spirit in the short time that he had been away, but an inexplicable tension hung in the air, as if an invisible weight, had fallen on everyone's shoulders.
– Master Guardian, – Hao Ning stepped forward and made a polite bow. – Has the truth about the death of this unworthy scholar been revealed to you?
– It has.
Hao Ning thought that he had long ago reconciled himself with fate and therefore any truth would be accepted by him with ease, but standing on the border between the world of Ghosts and Mortals before the eyes of the Guardian, waiting for him to speak, the youth realized how scared he was.
He couldn't tell whether he was ready for the sad truth or the frightening revelation. Only the memories of all the events he had experienced and the faithful friends who risked everything for him did not allow him to lower his head, helping him to face the truth.
– Please enlighten this unworthy one. Was he killed?
– No one did take such a sin upon their soul, – replied the Guardian calmly. – You weren't killed. Your spirit has lost its mortal shell due to an accident.
No matter how hard Hao Ning tried, he could not control the shiver that ran through his entire body. His palms began to shake noticeably, and tears appeared in the corners of his eyes. Desperately the young man raised his head, trying to find Wei Huan. The man was near, ready to protect him with unshakable strength and capable of warming with gentle warmth.
– A-Wei, – Hao Ning's voice trembled, – they didn't kill me. The hands of my brothers are not stained with blood! – the youth sobbed and Wei Huan wiped the tears from his cheeks. – They didn't want me to die... I'm so happy. Oh, so very happy!
The scholar's arms got wrapped around the warrior's waist, and the tip of his nose buried in Wei Huan's shoulder, enjoying the touches. His main fear was gone. No one of his mates let the guilt and anger into their hearts. None of them felt hatred towards him so they decided to carry out vile plots.
His life was cut short by accident, and Hao Ning no longer cared how exactly it happened.
– Were you worried about this? – Wei Huan's smile was warm and a little sad. – No one in the world would wish you dead, Ning-Ning.
The young man closed his eyes from the affectionate treatment, not wanting to say or listen to anything else. The only thing he wanted now was to continue his existence together with Wei Huan in the vast world of spirits: to go around every boundless corner of it hand in hand with this man.
– It seems that not all the words were said.
Wei Huan's unexpectedly cold tone made Hao Ning pull away to look at the wrinkle that had appeared between the man's frowning eyebrows. Dark eyes were directed towards the Guardian, who continued silently floating not far from them. The creature looked somewhat constrained and even confused as if he had thrown off the mask of eternal detachment. Such behavior of the Guardian could not hide from the attentive gaze of an experienced warrior.
Hao Ning pulled away from Wei Huan, turning to face the Guardian, awaiting his further narration. Whatever he said now, Ning would accept it without hesitation, because there was no longer any fear left in him.
The Guardian slowly stepped to the ground, touching the cracked stone with his snow-white feet. His appearance again became empty and aloof. The clouds circling the peak seemed to speed up their monotonous dance, trying to get to the Guardian. And the impossibility of doing this only gave rise to a countless scattering of sparks soaring upward.
– The soul is separated from the body of a mortal and at the meant hour enters one of the worlds. This is the inviolable and eternal rule of Heaven. However, your destiny has shackled the balance. You shouldn't have crossed the border.
Hao Ning shook his head in disbelief:
– What does it mean?
– Your spirit was summoned too early. Your body was saved and preserved. You are alive, Hao Ning. Immersed in deep slumber, but the thin thread connecting you with the mortal world still exists. – The Guardian raised his head, addressing the young man directly. – Thus you are allowed to cross the border.
If Wei Huan had not been nearby, the weakened body of the young adept would have sunk to the ground like a feather. The words that fell in a heavy wave covered Hao Ning, knocking out all the spirit and senses from him. He felt like a lost blind man who didn't know where to go or what to do, and therefore he just looked at one point, not even trying to move in the arms that clasped him.
It seemed to the youth that Wu Zhe Kai stepped closer, checking his condition with a cold hand.
Wei Huan tried to call the stunned Hao Ning, but he was unable to answer his friends.
Thoughts rushed before him in a chaotic whirlpool, finally forming into a complete picture. That's why he sometimes felt truly alive, different from other inhabitants of the Middle World. That is why distant, but so familiar sensations at times pierced his head: sounds, smells, voices. He was alive, but his body in the mortal world continued to call out for the wandering spirit.
At some indefinite moment, the hands supporting Hao Ning slipped from his shoulders, and this brought the young man to his senses. He leaned forward, trying to return Wei Huan's touch.
– Okay, he came to his senses, – the blurry image of Zhe Kai became clearer. – No need for my sobering blow then.
Hao Ning shook his head, trying to understand what had just happened. He found himself sitting on the rock that Wu Zhe Kai had previously occupied, surrounded by his friends. The Guardian, like a snowflake spinning in the air, slowly drifted along the edge at the same pace as the clouds above.
– A-Ning, how are you?
Wei Huan's palm rested on the top of Hao Ning's head, caressing it with the utmost care, as if he were made of fragile porcelain. His concern was pleasing, but also somewhat confusing. Hao Ning wanted Huan to see him as a worthy man, but for now, he felt like just a foolish child who continued to be looked after.
– I don't know, – answered the scholar honestly, – I can't understand.
Hao Ning lightly pressed his palms on his eyes, taking a deep breath of air sparkling with energy. This brought relief and made the fog in his head disappear.
– It's great to know that you're alive. Discouraging, but great. This means that they not only saved me, but they still sustain my body. It's good that I was an obedient student. – Hao Ning smiled, trying to soften his else's excitement. – But it changes nothing!
Wei Huan frowned as he looked at the pale face of the youth in front of him. Squatting, he was now slightly shorter than Hao Ning.
– What are you saying?
– I don't intend to cross the border. I'll stay here.
The crackling of the energy-rich clouds was annoyingly loud, breaking up the silence that hung between the three friends. It enveloped their bodies in a dense fog, squeezing their chests. Wu Zhe Kai pulled away first, realizing that his words weren't worth anything at the moment. Such a sensitive topic concerned only Wei Huan and Hao Ning. He could only come to terms with the final decision in a friendly manner and, if anything, patch up possible wounds in time. Although there was no need for the latter.
– Ning-Ning, – Wei Huan's voice was quiet and cautious. – You can come back to life, do you understand that?
– Yeah, so what?
– Then why are you giving up your chance?
Hao Ning looked at the general with such surprise, as if he had never heard anything more stupid in his whole life. Wei Huan continued to look at the person sitting in front of him completely calmly.
– I want to stay with you.
– A-Ning, – the young man's name was drowned in a sigh. – I'm dead and I can't be brought back. However, you have a chance to move on with your life. Don't be stubborn.
Wei Huan rose to his feet and Hao Ning did the same. He was still a little unsteady, but this condition quickly passed. Now the scholar's head was filled only with the man's words.
– Why do you insist on me doing this? I don't understand. Why do you want me to leave?
– Because the living have no place among the dead.
The general looked into Hao Ning's glassy eyes, but this time he did not feel sorry for him. Turning around, he walked with a firm step to the rocky edge, lowering his gaze to the purple waves.
– You must value your life.
– I want to value my opportunity to be with you! – a broken voice sounded very close, and a trembling was felt in the strong grip on the wrist. – Please, A-Wei, don't send me away. I need nothing. I was grieving, but now I'm not. I... I promised to be with you, to stay forever, to prove my devotion!
Wei Huan turned to face Hao Ning and he, taking advantage of this, grabbed the hanfu collar, not allowing the general to turn away from him anymore.
– I swore to Lao Ming that I will not leave you! – How can I break all my vows and let you suffer again?!
The hands covering his shoulders were warm and caring, the same as always. Except that now Wei Huan was using more force as if trying to push Hao Ning away from him.
– I got rid of my nightmares thanks to you, A-Ning. – And seeing how you are ready to give up the opportunity to feel the taste of life again for me, I believe every word you say. You don't have to prove anything.
– Wei Huan, – unbidden tears blurred Hao Ning's gaze again. – Please... I beg you. Let me stay. You are my God, my husband, my soul mate. – His trembling palm touched that man's cheek. – I want to be with you. I don't need anything in either world. Only you. I love you.
The trembling but warming gaze of the dark eyes did not hide from Hao Ning, who was listening to every word.
– You will truly cease to be my husband if you cross the border. – Wei Huan grabbed the thin waist, hugging the young man tightly and burying his nose in his temple. – Our marriage contract will be severed.
– A-Wei… – Ning's voice trembled with hope and joy. – So I can...
The general did not allow Hao Ning to finish. A light kiss touched the youth's lips like the weightless wing of a butterfly. The tenacious fingers weakened, letting go of the collar and gently moving to the back of the head. Warm gusts of wind fluttered his clothes and hair, and Hao Ning was ready to swear that his stopped heart was thumping dully in his chest, causing his long eyelashes to flutter and his lips to part in the hope of receiving more affection.
– Thank you, – the hot whisper gave me goosebumps, – I never dreamed that I would ever deserve a chance at happiness.
Wei Huan leaned his forehead against Hao Ning's, gently caressing the scholar's shoulders. His gaze slowly slid over half-closed eyes, flushed cheeks, and soft lips.
Hao Ning pressed himself so reverently and trustingly that he deprived Huan of his last strength and will.
– You allowed me to feel the taste of life again. How I wish our destinies had crossed earlier. If I had met you then, Hao Ning, many lives could have been saved. So many mistakes could have been avoided. What a pity that we found each other only in death.
– A-Wei?
– You know what I have always fought for. Every life is valuable, so I won't let anyone lose it because of me.
The gentle kiss on the forehead that followed the words did not feel warm and serene. He only caused an indescribable deep-seated fear in Hao Ning. A gusty sigh escaped from his chest.
The brown eyes showed disbelief. The body tilted backward like a heavy stone in an attempt to cling to the retreating image and the hand that had pushed it away.
The sparkling clouds embraced Hao Ning with maternal care. The image dear to the heart was shrouded in a veil of tears and whispers of farewell.
Hao Ning's consciousness drowned in the oblivion that lulled him to sleep.
***
– Sh-shixiong! Da-shixiong moved! Shixiong!
– Don't panic! Call the Master! At once! Bring water!
– Hurry! Wipe his forehead!
The voices bursting into consciousness were mixed, intertwined, and drowned out.
Some sounded louder, some drifted away to disappear. The cacophony of inaudible sharp noises made Hao Ning want to wince and close his ears so that they would stop piercing his head. He wanted to sleep, but the desire to open his eyes and take a look at the people around him was strong enough as well.
Hao Ning groaned barely audibly, and that made all the voices silent at once. And then again someone chirruped:
– He woke up! Shidy wasn't imagining things!
– Stop making noise and leave.
– Master!
The touch of a cold palm on his forehead filled Hao Ning's weak body with a stream of gentle spiritual power, comparable only to an icy spring river.
His consciousness became foggy again, and the fading voices no longer bothered his mind.
Hao Ning fell back into a peaceful sleep.
***
The amazingly beautiful snow on the tops of the mountain ranges sparkling in the rays of the midday sun gave a feeling of complete peace and serenity.
A gusty wind was blowing the snow cover off the bending branches, driving it in whirlwinds across the frost-covered grass.
The swirling steam filled the air with the aroma of green tea and fresh mantou. The sun's rays crouching through the open window illuminated the modest interior of the bamboo house, playing with the specs of dust hovering inside.
Long flowing hair the color of eared wheat fell in a heavy cascade over the thin shoulders. The white skin, which only a few days ago seemed deathly gray, was colored with a barely noticeable blush. The sunken cheeks, pale lips, and prominent cheekbones demonstrated the unhealthy state of the man resting on the couch. But brown eyes were burning bright on the emaciated face.
His gaze was steadily sliding over the rocky ledges, the cloudless sky, and the fields visible in the distance. The peasants had long since set to work, but from the heights of the Mount Redemption, their silhouettes seemed only minor blurred dots.
The high plateau, stretched in all the sides for many Li, resembled a marvelous carpet, among which were interspersed small villages and roads trodden by trading carts.
A quiet sigh escaped from Hao Ning's chest. His palm, placed on his heart, counted measured beats.
– So stubborn. You haven't eaten anything again, – a stern voice scolded, but did not condemn, – Thus you will need more time to recover.
– This disciple asks the master for forgiveness.
– If you offer a sincere apology, then you have to at least look at me.
The creaking of the chair pulled away hurt the ears, but Hao Ning did not give any importance to this. He turned his gaze to the man who entered the room. The blond man who was that close to inaccessible Heavens was not immortal, but he had long since exceeded the time limit allotted to mortals.
Only the rare wrinkles in the corners of his eyes that appeared whenever the man smiled, gave away his true age.
Five long years of Hao Ning's sleep didn't bring any changes to Mount Redemption. The bustle of the world did not reach these places, and therefore Hao Ning managed to learn very little from the stories of his younger classmates.
– I know this look of yours, Ning-er, – said the Master with serene understanding, – Will you share your thoughts with me?
– I'm going down the mountain.
The man's face didn't show any emotions, but the deep shadow could not hide the sadness in his wise eyes.
– You know the rules, Ning-er. You leave – you are not allowed to return. – the Master's voice did not change, his tone was still light and calm.
Hao Ning nodded decisively. He had already made his decision long before this conversation. Now he was neither asking for advice nor guidance. Just announced his will.
After awakening, Hao Ning's naivety dissipated like mist. The stubborn child turned into a different person. Unbearable sorrow and emptiness now dwelled in his eyes.
– Do you remember what your hasty actions led to?
– This disciple will never forget the mistake made. – Hao Ning extended his arms, politely bowing his head. – But for his Master, his soul would have long ago entered the cycle of rebirth. But now the apprentice is confident in the decision made and intends to implement it without delay.
– Ning-er, what are you going to do?
The sad gaze of brown eyes turned to the distant horizon again. The sun illuminated the exhausted face, and the passing wind pulled strands of long hair behind it.
– Something that my Master will never tolerate. The thing I will never forgive myself.
Hao Ning raised his hand, touching his chest with his fingertips, catching the forgotten beat beneath the shell of bones and red liquor. This seemed so wrong and unnatural now.
Even though he lived again, his heart remained far beyond the ranges of the mortal world.
THE END OF VOLUME I
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Shixiong – an address to the person who is older than the speaker in age or status (the younger one is called "shidi")
Da shixiong – an address to the senior disciple of the Master (the senior in training among the rest)
Shidi – an address to the person who is younger than the speaker in age or status (the elder is called "shixiong")