" You're as smart as Anna. Hell, probably smarter." She says with a sinister gin on her face.
"I'm literally ruining my life for this." I say lost in thought as I calculate the consequences of my actions.
"Not if he never finds out he will think that you're the victim, and so he will try to get you out of it. Just don't ruin the plan okay?" She says.
"With that said and done, can we proceed with it?" She asks, and I slowly nodd, as the weight of my decision settled in my mind. It was all for the greater good.
I headed down stairs and prepared supper for everyone, and I knew that Rafael didn't like salt in his food so I had to prepare his food aside, and that would be a huge aid to my plan. I added some drugs to his food, and I personally took it to him to execute my plan.
"Hello Father." I said knocking "I brought your supper to you because you've been here a while, so I figured you're working on something important and possibly didn't want to get down, and on that note I brought your food." I said as he let me in and I put the food on his desk.
"Seriously Jasmine, this is a little too much considering you're already very sick. But okay, I'll have it as you prepared with a lot of love and dedication, so it must have your blessing." He said gently closing the laptop and prayed for the food. I watched him with a smile while standing at a distance.
"You're not eating?" He asked amidst eating.
"I..... I honestly don't want to." I said nervously.
"Please join me." He said, signaling me to his side. My plan's first phase had worked.
"Oh, no I wouldn't want to be a bother." I say, turning around to leave.After a few seconds, he pulls me to sit next to him.
We ate as we had small talk and he asked me how I was doing, and I told him I was well. I timed till about a few moments to the medication to work, then I told him,
"I'm not feeling so good. My head is spinning." He carried me to a couch at the end of the room, as I faked a pass out. As I peeked from the corner of my eye, I could see the effects of the drugs starting to take control. He was trembling vigorously and locked the door. Then slowly by slowly he started taking off his garments. He tried to resist, but I was sure to put a dosage that would prevent his resistance. The drugs peaked and now his humongous member stood, rock solid and now it was time to execute the next phase of my plan.
Right then, I called him weakly,
"Father Rafael...." He came rushing to me. As he touched me, I scratched him a little, just enough to get his blood on the ground and give Laila access to his body, and it worked. As soon as Laila possesed his body, she shut down his sense of morals. And once she did, in Rafael's eyes, I saw nothing but lust.
He began to caress my cheek as I pretended not to enjoy every single moment.
"What are you doing Father...."
Before I could say anything, he forced his lips against mine, and as I slightly parted them to breath, he ferociously took control. Somehow, I expected it to be different from the one we had last time, but it was odly the same. That means that as he kissed me last time, he felt the exact way he was now, under the influence of Viagra. That kinda flattered me because it meant that I turned him on and hard. As he kissed me passionately, he moved his hand and slipped his fingers into my underwear. As he did so, something inside me snapped. It told me that this wasn't Rafael. I tried to push him aside but he was strong. His body was on mine now and the weight was unbearable.
"Father, what are you doing...." I started but he wouldn't listen. Instead he pressed harder and gripped my hand that I used to resist even harder making it sting so bad. He was hurting me.
"You're hurting me stop please...." I said weakly now that the sedative I took was setting in. What happened next shocked the living shit out of me. He slapped me hard across the face, and then took both my hands and placed them above me. He proceeded to kiss me, and bite me, leaving pink marks allover my skin. I started crying at this point and hoping that his sedatives set in. Lucky for me, they set in, and he slowly lost strength, and we both passed out.
I woke up to people shaking me awake and as the mist cleared from my eyes, I made out the faces of the sisters of the convent all worried about me.
"Oh my dear. You must have suffered a lot." Mother superior said placing her hands on my cheek. My hands threw themselves instinctively around my chest as I looked around. When my eyes met with that of father Rafael's, I felt fear and guilt run over me like a wrecking ball. He looked down in pure guilt and disgust. When mother superior saw my reaction, she went over and slapped Rafael hard across the face and my heart stopped. That was when I looked closely at him, he was bruised, whipped. Just before she could slap him again, I ran in front of Mother superior and knelt before her.
"Please mother, don't blame him, he was not himself." I say realizing that the consequences of my actions were worse than I could imagine.
"Daughter, tell me honestly did he force himself on you?" Father Agustin asked me, fury and rage present in his eyes.
I hesitated to answer as I looked at Rafael who couldn't even face me. I wished in that moment that the ground would just open up and swallow me whole.
"It is a simple yes or no question. Did he force himself on you?" He asked again, trying to be kind but his frustration and anger were unmistakable.
"Yes, but....." Before I could go on, they lashed him once again and I instinctively threw myself on him to try and block the whip and it ran across my body. The priest then tried to whip him again, and push me away but I didn't budge.
"Please spare him. He wasn't in his right senses he was probably drugged, please." I said but they weren't buying my statement.
"No, I am the one he has offended and that gives me all the right to forgive him." I said before the father can command me to move aside.
"You might have, but we won't. Rafael, you are now stripped of your role as father and you shall no longer serve in this seminary or any other. You are here by required to evacuate this building immediately, and you shall only come back after a year of penance. Also as you have assaulted Jasmine, we as the church expect you to take responsibility, and marry her with all the rituals, and maintain the sacredness of this marriage. Am I understood?" Father Agustin said and everyone went silent except Rafael who said quietly,
"I accept the punishment father, I shall do as you have asked."
When everyone else had left and it was just me and Rafael left, he fell to his knees and appologised profusely. The guilt I felt was overwhelming.
"I am so sorry Jasmine. I promise you I will never lay a hand on you, and I will never hurt you again." He said sobbing.
"It's okay Rafael. I know and I know you didn't do it intentionally. You're not that kind of person." I said as I hugged him and he hugged me back.
I had finally gotten what I wanted. We got married as per church rituals and me and Rafael actually lived pretty well. He wasn't in love with me, but he treated me like his best friend. And as for Laila, I had fulfilled my vow to her and I had no debt of hers anymore, but she still lingered quietly inside me, and I didn't mind it. Something else was bothering me. The guilt. A year passed and Rafael hadn't ever touched me or even showed a glimpse of love for me and I started to feel like maybe it was all worth nothing. And what was worse was that I couldn't take the guilt anymore. So one day I waited for him to get home.
"Hey Jasmine, are you okay?" He asked concerned.
"It was me, I was the one who drugged you that day."
I immediately saw the light that he had transform into a vicious rage.
"Why? " He asked me trying to keep his cool.
"Because I loved you, and I always have."
"So you destroyed my life just because of your lust? Do you know how dedicated I was to serving God, or how upset I was thinking that I had hurt you? You know what, there is no need explaining to you, I'm happy you got what you wanted. But I'll have you know, that I hate you with all of my heart. And I will never give you what you had worked so hard for."
The tears in his eyes and the anger, hurt and truthfulness in his voice shattered me. And ever since then, we have been living like roommates. He even addresses me by my maiden name, and not his surname. And for the past five years, I have tried all I have to redeem myself. I worked hard, passed nursing school, and even got a job in the same hospital as his to be close to him, but it has never worked. If anything, I feel like I'm moving further away from him.
I bring myself back to the present where I finally accept my fate and let myself go. As I dropped from the height, the air cut through my lungs like a breath of fresh air, then I hit the water hard, and it almost felt solid. As I ran out of breath, sinking in the cold dark water, I could learn someone shout my name from a distance. I prayed and hoped that whoever it was, they won't find me.