Part 1
Accompanied with a large spray of water, a gigantic eight-headed dragon emerged from the lake.
That's the high bounty target, the Kowloon Hydra.
"Oh, wow, it really does deserve the high price set on it's head!"
I excitedly yelled towards my companions as the Hydra reared it's huge body, but they simply stared blankly at it.
I only came along because Kazuma was asking for help in the adventurer's guild, but this is far bigger than I thought.
Apparently, Kazuma tried and failed to take the Hydra down with just his party before, so now he decided to try again with help from the other adventurers.
We aren't the only ones to answer his call. Dozens of adventurers are participating in this fight.
The adventurers present had a grim look on their faces as they listened to Kazuma's instructions.
"All thieves, you brought your steel wires, right? Archers, standby with your grappling hook arrows!"
The archers and thieves nodded.
I could hear the voice of the priest screaming "Hurry up! Hurry up!" as Kazuma explained everyone's roles, but I'll ignore it for now.
The basic outline is to let Darkness act as bait and draw the Kowloon Hydra away, before blowing it away with the explosion girl's magic.
As expected of someone who deals with those three troublesome ladies every day, the instructions are precise and the overall plan isn't bad.
"Even though Kazuma's pretty weak in combat, he has a surprising amount of talent."
"Now's not the time to stand around being impressed! Keith, is the arrow ready!?"
"Yeah, leave it to me."
Keith is currently attaching the rope to the arrow.
"Sadly, Darkness alone won't be able to stop all the attacks of that Hydra. I'll be protecting the rear guard!"
"Don't do anything reckless, Taylor! If you take an attack head on, there wouldn't be anything left of you!"
"Yeah, I'll bear that in mind!"
Taylor and Keith ran over to where the rest of the rear guard was gathering.
Looking closely, I can see the nervous form of Yunyun amongst the mages.
Even in such a situation, she still couldn't get over her unease when facing unfamiliar people.
On the battlefield, the heads of the Hydra were tied together by the thieves' Bind, the grappling hook arrows were entangled in the steel wires that the thieves used, and those adventurers who were confident in their strength were pulling on those ropes in order to prevent the Hydra from escaping.
"Hey, what is Kazuma doing?!"
While Darkness was fending off the Hydra's attacks, Kazuma climbed up onto the Hydra's back and was doing… something up there.
Judging from the way the Hydra started violently thrashing around, that must have been some kind of attack.
Even so, that's way too dangerous. I always knew that Kazuma was bold, but I didn't think that he would go this far.
"Ah, watch out! Kyaaaa!"
Lynn let out a scream as she watched Kazuma get bucked off the Hydra's back.
It's great that Darkness managed to grab him before he hit the ground, but then the Hydra rolled over the both of them, covering them with it's entire bulk.
If it was Darkness alone, between her prided toughness and the various support spells casted upon her, she could probably survive being crushed by the Hydra, but Kazuma would definitely die from that.
"Hey, you guys, don't let Kazuma and his party hog all the spotlight! Come on, you're all tough men, right? Put your backs into it!"
"I don't need you to tell me that!"
"We can get things done tooooo!"
"I'm a girl, but don't look down on me!"
Wishing to reduce the burden on Darkness by even just a little, one of the adventurers issued that challenge, and, with a loud scream, the surrounding adventurers redoubled their efforts in pulling the ropes.
Even though the Hydra seemed to be immobile, the other adventurers were too busy with trying to save Kazuma's and Darkness's life to launch an attack.
… Wait, isn't this the perfect opportunity?
Killing an immobile Hydra is something even I can do.
"Look, isn't the Hydra becoming really weak? And it can't move, either! I'll be taking the head of the large bounty target, Kowloon Hydra! The entire bounty can be collected by the one who finishes it off! I ain't sharing it with anyone else!!"
I loudly declared before letting go of the rope and charged straight at the Hydra's neck.
"H-Hey, what the hell are you saying right now?! Plus it only can't move because it's necks are tied together. If you let your guard down…"
I think I can hear Lynn's voice coming from behind me, but I don't have time to bother with that right now.
If I take the Hydra's head right now, I'll get entire bounty to myself and be able to bask in the envious gazes of everyone else!
Just when I got within reach of the Hydra's necks, I noticed something.
Darkness, who was the focus of the Hydra's attacks until just now, is currently protecting Kazuma under the Hydra's enormous bulk. In other words, the Hydra doesn't currently have a target…
Just when I realized that, a huge mouth filled with numerous sharp fangs appeared in front of me.
Just before my vision turned black-
"Ahhh! Dust! Dust!!"
I think I heard Lynn scream.
Part 2
"Dust-san… Welcome to the afterlife. I'm the goddess that will guide you on your new path, Eris. Your life has come to an end."
When my vision became clear again, I found myself in a white, palace like place.
And a woman who suddenly told me such inexplicable things was standing in front of me.
She was wearing an exquisite looking white hagoromo, with pure white hair and light skin, unblemished by the sun.
Her clothes are similar to the needlessly expensive ones that high ranking priests usually adorn themselves with. It nicely accentuates her moderate chest, though… it feels strangely unnatural somehow.
It came to me in a flash. Ah, I see. Her breasts are stuffed. I only noticed it because I often pay attention to women's breasts and buttocks.
Well, as long as you look past her breasts, she's a top class beauty. That top class beauty regarded me with sad, blue eyes.
I'm used to the women giving me disgusted looks after sexually harassing them, but I don't recall anyone ever looking at me this way before.
"Did you fall for me?"
"Where did that come from?"
"Well, you were looking at me with the gaze of a maiden in love."
"This is the gaze pitying you who charged head first into the jaws of a Hydra."
This woman is really rude. It's only our first meeting, too.
Come to think of it, she said some inexplicable things to me earlier. Could she be a religious solicitor?
This pure white room certainly seems like the type favoured by clergymen.
"Sorry, I have no interests in such matters. Especially if it is the Axis Cult. Please go somewhere else."
"Eh? No, that's not what I'm trying to do. If anything, I'd be an Eris Cultist, and this isn't a religious solicitation."
"That's not it? My memories are a little fuzzy… Wait, don't tell me, did I end up drunk and cause a ruckus again!?"
"Um, excuse me, could you please listen to me explain?"
"In such a luxurious looking shop… You're planning on asking me to compensate a huge sum as payment, aren't you? Well, sorry to say, but my wallet is empty. Too bad, I definitely won't be done in so easily."
It's impossible for such a unblemished white empty room to be some kind of high class bar.
Did I step into some kind of secret noble's store?
"Ripped off… You really are a friend of Kazuma-san. Seems like normal methods won't get through to you."
"Oh, you know Kazuma, do you? This will be simple then. Just put it on my friend's tab."
"This isn't a drinking establishment! Please listen to me!"
Even though she looks calm and was speaking with a gentle voice, she suddenly shouted.
Huh? This voice and this feeling… Where have I…
"Let's start over again, Dust-san… Welcome to the afterlife. I'm the goddess that will guide to your new path, Eris. Your life has come to an end."
"Hey, come on, of all things, you had to proclaim yourself as the Goddess Eris. I thought you looked pretty decent, but you're the same as Kazuma's party-loving priest. Is proclaiming yourself a goddess the in thing to do nowadays?"
"Please don't lump me in the same category as Senpai!"
"Senpai?"
"Ah, sorry, that was unsightly. Anyways, you're dead."
Boldly saying something like that… it seems like Self-Proclaimed Goddess Number Two has appeared.
Though, unlike Aqua, the beautiful nee-chan in front of me is strangely convincing. She has the appearance and demeanour that doesn't make it sound like a joke even when she claims to be a goddess.
Could she be the real deal?
"Even if you say that, I have no recollection of it."
"Everyone's a little confused for a short while after they died. Please take your time and try and recall what happened."
Prompted by her gentle voice, I racked my memories.
"I woke up early for once and went to the adventurer's guild. Since I was both free and broke, I entertained myself by staring at Luna's peaks at the counter, and she threatened to call the police."
"… What are you doing bright and early in the morning?"
"I thought I'd try and find someone I know to sponge breakfast off of, then I ran into Kazuma…"
Unusually for him, Kazuma was working hard at recruiting people, so I decided to join in on the Kowloon Hydra extermination quest.
Apparently Darkness has some kind of grudge against that creature, but I don't really care about the reason. A friend of mine needs help. There's no reason for me to refuse.
Plus, my wallet was feeling a little empty.
Then, during the battle…
"Aargh, I got done in just as I was about to shine! Just a little more and I would've been able to hog the entire bounty!"
"You're upset over that part… But it seems like you finally understand. Unfortunately, your short life has come to an end. It seems like you were quite infamous in Axel, and lead a life that caused trouble for a lot of people."
Saying such things with a smile just makes you seem more scary.
There are so many things that came to mind that I didn't know which one to start with.
"Well, I don't really recall such things happening. At the very least, I didn't end up committing any crimes, right?"
"You very much did. How many times do you think the police have taken care of you?"
"Hey, come on, there's no way I could possibly remember that. Can you remember how many times you've been arrested by the police?"
When I replied to her question with another question, the Self-Proclaimed Goddess Number Two looked down and trembled.
See? You normally won't be able to remember such things.
"Zero times! Normally you wouldn't end up in the care of the police at all! It's because you lead such a life that you don't have any good karma… Huh? Wait, what?"
She ended up being flustered as she read the piece of paper in her hand. Just what is written on it?
She repeatedly looked towards my face and back towards the piece of paper.
"It seems like you've quite a bit of good karma. Eh? Even though you lived as you will back in Axel? Did I mix up the paperwork? I had to go down quite often lately, so did I accidentally bring up a different file?"
She placed a finger on her cheek and pondered.
Seems like that piece of paper holds what I've done with my life.
Good karma, huh? It's probably the stuff I did during that time.
"Say, did you do something for someone else's benefit in the past?"
"Who knows? Still, if you know about that, then it seems that you really weren't lying about being a goddess."
I don't really like talking about the past.
I suppose I should focus on the current situation. I didn't want to believe it, but it seems like I really have died.
So I'm dead, huh? Maybe because it still hasn't hit me, but it feels surprisingly abrupt.
A lot of things happened in my life, and to meet my end at the jaws of a subspecies of dragon… perhaps this is fate.
Even right at the end, I still couldn't cut my ties with dragons.
It's a little late to say this, but after calming down and observing her, this goddess Eris really does have a divine feel to her.
"You finally accepted it. You have more good karma than I expected, so you have two choices available after death."
She started explaining, so I guess I should properly listen.
"Option one, that's to be reborn as a human and begin your life anew. In this case, your current memories will be completely wiped."
To be reborn, huh. Does that mean I will lose all memories of the days spent in that country and start fresh?
I wonder what Lynn and the others are doing now that I'm dead… It'll be pretty galling if they feel relieved that I'd died.
"The other option would be to spend the rest of eternity in heaven together with the other dead souls."
"What's over there? There are gambling dens and bars over there, right?"
"There are no such things. Everyone exists as a soul over there, so there's no need to eat, sleep, or want for anything."
"If no one has a body over there, that means I can't fondle breasts or pinch butts or do anything erotic!"
"Of course! People spend their days living peacefully."
A world without alcohol or flesh, where everyone simply lives without doing anything.
… Isn't that hell?
What's so fun about living in a world where you can't satisfy your desires? That leaves me with only one real option.
"You don't have to rush into this. Choosing what path to go down is a very important-"
"Hello, hello? Can you hear me? Aqua-sama has revived you, so hurry on back home."
A carefree sounding voice that emerged from nowhere interrupted Goddess Eris.
That's the voice of Kazuma's party priest, right?
Oh, yeah, she could revive people, couldn't she?
"Oh, that means I don't have to die, right!?"
"Sigh… Again? Recently, the rate of death amongst the adventurers of Axel have really fallen. She immediately revives them even if they die… It's not a bad thing, but… The heavenly laws do allow you to be revived once, so you can go back to your world, Dust-san. I'll open the gate now."
With a huge sigh, she snapped her fingers.
As she did so, a white gate suddenly appeared in front of me.
"I don't really get it, but I've troubled you today. May I have a question as a memento for meeting a goddess?"
"Yes, what is it?"
"Are those breasts real?"
I pointed at those unnatural looking bumps on her chest, and Goddess Eris simply opened the gate with a smile.
"Please try not to come back for a long time. We won't acknowledge your resurrection next time."
"But Kazuma keeps boasting about coming back numerous times-"
"Now then, please try and lead a life without regrets."
The moment those words left her lips, I was forcibly pushed through the gate.
Part 3
Lynn's tear-stained face was in front of me.
Behind her, looking over with a worried expression, were Keith and Taylor.
"Dust! Duuust! You idiot! Why did you have to make me worry like that!?"
Lynn hugged me the moment I raised my upper body.
I couldn't quite gather my strength, and with the awkward position she caught me in, I couldn't do anything to prevent myself from falling to the ground once more.
I hit my head quite loudly on the ground and opened my mouth to voice my complaints, but those words died on my tongue after seeing Lynn's crying face.
If you're still here… Seems like I can't die just yet.
"Sorry."
Saying that, I lightly patted her on the head.
This is the first time I've seen her so emotional. I must have really worried her.
"Phew. Still, it's great that you managed to be revived. Your body was in a seriously bad way, so I was really worried."
"Yeah, even I thought it was impossible after seeing that."
Keith and Taylor said something strange.
Looking down at my body, apart from a piece of cloth around my waist, I wasn't wearing anything.
"You guys didn't pull some kind of prank on me while I couldn't resist-!"
"As if!" x2
"Then why am I naked?"
"That's because you took a really long dip in the Hydra's stomach."
"You looked like a piece of cheese after being roasted over a fire."
"… Seriously?"
I thought that my body felt strangely slimy and sticky… so you're saying that these are the remnants of gastric juices?
If my clothes have melted completely, that means… it's best not to think about that.
"Dust, be sure to thank Aqua-san. If she didn't repair your body and revive you, you would've been dead for sure.."
"Ah, right, I need to properly thank her later."
Aqua's voice reached me even on the other side.
She brought me back from the dead. No matter how many times I thank her, it wouldn't be enough.
I can't see her right now, but I'll properly thank her after we've returned to the guild.
Part 4
After returning to the guild, I managed to get my hands on a replacement set of clothes and was finally able to bid farewell to walking around half naked.
I only had a piece of cloth around my waist. It was really drafty down there and felt disgusting.
From what I've heard, I was the only one who died there, and since I got revived, the task was completed without any casualties. Taking down such a large bounty target without any sacrifices made the guild staff very happy as well.
"We are surprisingly capable, aren't we!? Though, we wouldn't have been able to pull it off without Kazuma's party."
"Yeah! Kazuma's really amazing! We originally decided to split the rewards from the Hydra extermination quest evenly, but Kazuma's group really should get a bigger share. There's an idiot who said, 'The entire bounty can be collected by the one who finishes it off!', so they should take that idiot's share with them."
It's fine that Keith and Lynn are raving about Kazuma's abilities. I think the same way, after all.
But don't just offer them my share.
That's what I wanted to say, but the truth is, I don't have a leg to stand on.
I didn't do anything great in this fight. If there's one slight silver lining that came out of this incident… well, I suppose meeting with Eris counts as as a good thing.
I'll be able to use it as a topic of conversation for quite some time, and the Eris cultists are sure to jump on it. If I play my cards well, I might even be able to make some money from this.
Oh, before that, I need to go find Aqua. I still haven't properly thanked her yet.
Looking around, I found her quite some distance away from Kazuma's group.
When I drew closer, I noticed that she was making a truly marvelous painting on the table with water.
She's seriously talented. Couldn't she make a living with this?
"Do you have a moment?"
"What? It'll be completed in just a while, so please hold on for a moment if you have some business with me."
It's the words of my saviour, so I obediently waited, and she ended up painting a picture of a hydra that seemed like it could jump out at any moment.
It's really regrettable that it will vanish after a short while.
"So, what is it? Actually, who are you?"
"I'm the guy you revived, Dust! We went on an adventure together, didn't we!? Ah, nevermind. You saved my life, so let me express my gratitude."
As I said that, the suspicious, furrowed expression that Aqua was regarding me with suddenly changed.
She broke out into a wide smile, thrust her chest out and glanced at me as though she was trying to send me some kind of signal. Is she asking me to praise her more?
"I can't thank you enough. To think that a priest capable of casting Resurrection would be in this town. I thought that in a different meaning before, but you really do exceed my wildest imaginations."
So I flattered her. She should be satisfied with this, right?
Just as I thought that and raised my head, she nodded her chin at me as if to say, "Praise me more, praise me more."
… Well, I do owe her my life, so I suppose that's fine.
"I always thought that you were an amazing person, but I didn't expect you to be this amazing. You really opened my eyes there. There probably isn't a priest as capable as you. You really are the most beautiful priest on the continent."
How's that? I pulled out all the stops. With that…
What's with that gaze? What are you expecting from me? Isn't that enough?
"I'm really grateful to you. Right, I'll see you around."
As I turned around and started heading back, I felt something grab my sleeve.
Fearfully turning around, I saw a gaze filled with desire starting up at me.
.
-------------------->
.
"Isn't that… enough?"
"Not yet! It's nowhere near enough! Everyone's been treating me like a fool ever since I came here, so praise me properly! Say it louder so that everyone can hear!"
I've been caught by a really troublesome person. I'm grateful to her, but anything more would just be troublesome, so I shook her off and hurried away.
And of course, her footsteps chased after me.
"Come on, show more reverence to me! Say that you're very grateful to Aqua-sama for reviving you! Praise me more!"
"Ah, you're so annoying!"
Her guardian! Where's her guardian!?
Happily drinking while being surrounded by everyone… There he is!
"Hey Kazuma! I'm thankful for being revived, but the priestess from your party's really annoying!"
I managed to push Aqua who was clinging onto me with a death grip to Kazuma, before making a quick escape.
-x-X-x-
Konosuba Dust Spinoff 2: Chapter 2
-x-X-x-
Part 1
Even though we reached what seemed to be the deepest part of the dungeon, instead of running into monsters, the only thing that awaited us was a dust-covered room that seemed to have been the residence of a bachelor.
A simple bed stood at the side, along with a table and a chair. The bookcase next to it was stuffed to the brim, but the books themselves were too weathered to read.
There were several unidentifiable items placed under square glass cases.
There's a room further in the back, but that only lead to a bath.
This place is probably the living quarters of the mage who created the dungeon.
"What a shabby room. Here I thought we'd be able to reap some rewards after all the trouble we went through."
"Don't complain, Keith. It was already lucky enough that we were allowed to investigate a dungeon that no one else has entered before."
Taylor chided the grumbling Keith.
Keith has black hair and black eyes. With his slim body and a tuft of hair perpetually covering one eye, he could be said to be a pretty handsome man. That said, I've never seen him be particularly popular with the ladies.
His skills as an archer aren't bad, but he's a frequent skirt chaser, bad with sake, and easily gets carried away. That's probably why he isn't more popular.
Within the party, he's the one closest to me, and we often go out drinking together.
Taylor is both physically and mentally the opposite of Keith. He's tall and muscular, a serious and inflexible crusader.
"I feel oddly tired. Seems like my body isn't fully recovered yet. Sigh, I want to go back and rest."
My body has felt off ever since I got eaten by the Hydra.
It feels like I still haven't gotten used to my newly rejuvenated body…
"Yeah, yeah, if you have the time to grumble, start moving your hands. A mage capable of creating such a dungeon might still have some kind of treasure hidden away somewhere."
The person who tried to encourage the two of us was the only girl in our party, Lynn.
Her red hair is tied into a ponytail. Her face still has traces of youth, but don't be fooled by her appearance. She has an extremely harsh personality, especially towards me.
"You too, don't just stand there and look, hurry up and help."
"Yeah, yeah, I just need to work, right?"
See? She's harsh, isn't she?
As a warrior, I don't think I'll be able to find anything even if I search, but I'll at least go through the motions. She'll nag at me if I don't.
"Say, doesn't this area seem a little off?"
When I randomly hit a few sections of the wall, it made a weird click.
Hmm?
Cold sweat flowed down my spine.
"Did you hear something weird just now?"
Seems like the sound was louder than I thought, and everyone looked over in my direction.
Just when I was about to come up with some kind of excuse, the earth started rumbling.
Don't tell me this is my fault?! Isn't this really bad!?
"I-I didn't do anything! Whatever happens, it wasn't my fault! This is just a strange twist of fate- Aaaah!"
The wall which my hand was pressed up against suddenly slid aside, causing me to lose my balance and fall into the newly opened gap.
"Ow, that hurt! What the hell is going on!?"
As I raised myself back up, I noticed that the space that the wall used to occupy led to a new room. It was much larger with a much higher ceiling than the room we were currently in.
Apart from a pair of doors, one on each side of the room, it was completely empty.
"It's strangely bright in there. Is it coming from the magic item on the ceiling?"
"Seems like it. You did great to find a hidden room, Dust!"
With a loud bang, Lynn slapped me hard on the back.
"Don't you guys know how to hold back!? Still, what kind of room is this? Normally you'd expect there to be treasure in a hidden room… but there are just two doors here."
"There's probably treasure behind one of the doors, or perhaps behind both. After going through all the effort to create such a large room, there can't possibly be nothing here. It'd be great if it's something valuable. Right, let's start with the right door."
Keith moved over to the right door and reached out for the doorknob.
"Be careful, Keith. We should've hired a thief along. Even though the guild told us that it's a monster nest and thus there shouldn't be any traps…"
"It's too late to be saying that. We haven't run into any traps so far, so it's fine. I'll be taking the left door then. Ah, right, I was the one who found this secret room! Make sure you remember that! If we find any treasure from this, make sure you give me a bigger cut!"
"Then, if a monster comes out, you can go deal with it all by yourself."
"… It's only common sense to split the rewards evenly with your companions."
As an adult, I should make a rational decision here.
Keith and Taylor took the right door, leaving Lynn and I to take the left.
Lynn seemed extremely guarded and took cover behind me, but let's just ignore that.
"Right, now even if the door explodes and blows you to pieces, or poison gas comes out and chokes you to death, or spears come out and run you through, or flesh dissolving acid were to spray out, I'll be safe. Alright, go ahead and open it."
"What the hell are you saying! Stop saying such terrifying things! Plus, if the explosion is that strong, you'll be caught in the blast radius as well!"
"Don't say such unauspicious things. Now just standing next to you is making me shiver."
"Hey, come on, stop blushing."
Is she secretly happy to be able to perish together with me?
Thinking that, I took a closer look at Lynn's face and found a genuinely displeased expression on it.
"I'm not blushing. In the first place, I'm headed for heaven and you're headed to hell, so we'll end up in different places."
"Well, too bad. It's already been decided that I'll go to heaven too. I heard it directly from Eris-sama herself."
"Yeah, yeah, you met her back when you got eaten by the hydra. I've heard it countless times by now. Please try and tell a more believable lie."
"I'm not lying! Why the hell does no one believe me!? I really did meet with Eris-sama and talked with her! Her chest was quite suspicious, though."
"Oh, wow, how wonderful-. You'll end up receiving divine punishment if you keep making fun of the gods. Come on, hurry up and open it. Taylor and Keith are already searching the room opposite us."
Looking over to where Lynn was pointing, the door was already open and Taylor was nowhere to be seen.
Right, time to stop with all this chatter and get on with it.
I carefully twisted the doorknob, and fortunately nothing trap-like seemed to have been triggered.
I gently pushed the door open a peep and peeked inside.
"It's too dark to see anything. Can you pass me the lantern?"
"Got it. Here."
With the lantern in hand, I took a single cautious step into the room. At that instant, a blinding light came shining down from the ceiling.
"A trap!? Lynn!"
I instantly embraced Lynn and covered her with my body.
I waited for some kind of shockwave or pain to wash over me, but nothing of the sort came.
"Hey, how long do you intend to hug me for? You sure have some guts to be committing sexual harassment in broad daylight."
Said a muffled voice from my chest.
It's a voice that barely concealed her anger.
"Ah, sorry. It's not like I tried to enjoy the sensation of your chest against me only to be disappointed by the lack of bounciness or anything."
"Right, sit right there. I'll burn you to your bones."
"Wait, come on! It was obviously a joke! Stop chanting! C-Come on, now's not the time for this. Now that the place is lit, we can take a better look around the room."
Lowering her staff, Lynn slowly looked around with a scowl on her face.
Seems like I managed to somehow divert her attention for now, so let's focus my efforts on observing the interior.
There's a small spherical object amongst the haphazard pile of trash in the corner of the room. Just what is that?
It fit snugly into the palm of my hand and felt quite smooth when I touched them.
There's a little part protruding from the top that made a click when I pushed it, but it doesn't seemed to have caused any changes at all.
"Well, this is no fun."
I lost interest in it and threw it by my feet.
Now that I take a better look, this room is bigger than the room I occasionally rent out at the inn.
The wall in front of me is lined with bookcases, and most of them were filled to the brim.
"This looks like a fine bookcase. Unlike the ones outside, the books here seem to be in pretty good condition."
Some kind of writing is present on the spine of the book, but I can't understand them
I've never seen such writing before.
"What kind of language is this? There are a lot of characters in eye-catching colours… Lets flip through it."
I pulled out a book at random and turned over the page.
"O-Oh my, what a huge find!"
I understood the value of such an item from the moment I saw the page.
This is a priceless treasure!
"W-W-W-W-What the hell is this!?"
Lynn was screaming something, but I was too engrossed in the book to care.
This book has few words, but a lot of pictures. The only words seem to be dialogue taking place between the characters. With those pictures, even when I can't read the dialogue, I can understand the gist of what's going on.
A woman wearing clothing I've never seen before is standing in a crowded room. Everyone's wearing the same clothing, so it must be some kind of uniform.
Still, they are dressed very erotically. Their skirts are extremely short.
I turned the page.
Now, the same woman is approaching an older man in a clean looking room with a bed. And the man reached down towards the woman's skirt with a grin…
"This one too! And this! And this! Why the hell are they all filled with erotic pictures!?"
Prompted by the scream, I raised my head and saw a flustered Lynn in front of me, her face a bright red.
A number of books are strewn on the floor around her, and judging from the pictures on the covers, every single one of them is erotic.
I rapidly flipped through the book in my hand. There has be a scene where they are doing the deed, right?
This book… It's overflowing with erotic passion… I can't get enough of this.
The details on the pictures are surprising in itself, but the pages feel smooth and don't crumple at all even when I was flipping through them. It feels completely different from a regular book. Could this be a really amazing treasure?
"Hey, don't treat them so roughly. These are the treasures of mankind."
"What treasures? These are just erotic picture books!"
"You fool. These books bring forth the fantasies of men in such an exquisite manner. They'll sell for quite a sum! I can't understand the words, but even so, I can understand what they're doing."
"Y-Y-You pervert!"
She squared her shoulders and turned away.
Looks like women and children can't understand the value of this item. This is the best form of art.
"I'll take a closer look at the goods. Lynn, are you heading back to meet up with Keith and Taylor? You guys can take a break if you want."
"Yeah… I exhausted most of my mana in the fighting, so I'll take a rest."
Now that the one who'd get in the way has left, I'll be able to properly examine these books.
The dreams shown to me by the succubi are amazing too, but this book depicts scenes that have never crossed my mind before.
It'll probably increase her skill at creating dreams if I show these books to Loli Succubus. I should send a few volumes her way.
I didn't have time to properly peruse them right now, but I noticed a certain bias when I casually flipped through a few volumes.
"Aren't there a lot of scenes where the men are getting attacked?"
There are some vanilla works in there, but for some reason, it seems like a lot of them depict men getting attacked by women.
Darkness will probably happily pay for them if the situation was reversed.
The bookcases near the entrance were filled with erotic books, but the other bookshelves are filled with non-erotic picture books too.
Seems like a large variety of books are present here. This book painted with warm colours depicting plenty of children seems like it'd be right up Lynn's alley. I'll pass it to her later.
For the time being, I decided to pack a few carefully chosen erotic books into my bag. I'll need to slowly peruse those back in my room. There are quite a few of them, so I'll have to get Keith and the others to help carry it later.
Oh, yeah, I wonder what happened to them?
With my bag filled to bursting, I headed over to the other room only to find them standing blankly in front of the door.
"What's wrong? You didn't find anything?"
"Ah, Dust… Let's go home."
"Yeah. Sigh. There's no reason for us to spend any more time here."
Keith being lazy is just par for the course for him, but it's quite surprising to hear Taylor say such a thing.
Did they end up being depressed because there was nothing in the other room?
"Don't feel so down. There's a mountain of treasure in the other room. This will definitely sell back in town."
Saying that, I brought out my favourite book from the collection and showed it to the two of them.
They moved their gaze down to look at the book… And that's it.
"Sigh."
"Sigh."
Why are you guys sighing? There's an amazing erotic picture right in front of you right now!
"Hey, seriously, what happened to you two? That's not the reaction you should have after seeing this picture! Even if you are tired, a different body part would be standing right at attention! My longsword is stiff and ready, you know!?"
"Ah, well, it is erotic."
"Yeah, it's pretty obscene."
What's with that tepid reaction?
Such a picture would normally cause men to jump for joy. Even if you are exhausted to the point where you'd drop dead, it's impossible for men to react like this.
In particular, Keith is pretty much the physical embodiment of lust. Why the hell isn't he biting?
"W-What happened? Did you eat something strange without telling me? I won't get mad, so tell me the truth."
"They're probably just tired, Dust. We had a pretty tough fight, after all. Anyway, there doesn't seem to be anything more to this place, so let's head back."
Lynn butted into the conversation, and the two of them simply replied with a listless "Sure."
Seems like something's really wrong with them. Alright, guess I'll just stuff their bags with the books and hurry back to town.
As we hurried our way back, even though the two men seemed pretty steady on their feet, all they said on the trip back were variations of "I'm tired" in a listless monotone.
Part 2
The next day, just as I was eating at my usual spot at the guild, a glum-faced Lynn plodded down the stairs towards me.
"What's with that long face? Is it that time of the month?"
"Do you not know what tact is? Keith and Taylor seemed pretty out of it, so I told them to take a rest today."
She sat down with a sigh and placed an order with the waitress.
"Those guys are still listless? I even gave them a few of the best volumes… They aren't exhausted because of that, are they?"
It might not be as good as the dreams provided by the succubi, but we aren't rich enough that we can request their services every time we get in the mood.
Those books are an unparalleled treasure to us men in allowing us to relieve our desires whenever we want.
When I gave one to Kazuma, he went,
"Hey, isn't this a Japanese ero-manga? Where did you get these from? Are there any ones involving stepsisters?"
And practically snatched it from me.
"I see. So Keith worked too hard yesterday and wore himself out, huh?"
"That's not it. The two of them said that they don't want to move for a few days. They can't get rid of their fatigue, it seems."
"How shabby. Come on, even I am full of energy right here."
"You're not the only one. I too am feeling pretty normal."
Did the two of them catch some strange disease?
Hopefully, it's just simple fatigue. I'll bring up something nice for them later on.
"Well, it can't be helped. Guess we'll be on break for a while."
"Did you forget? You accepted a quest for the day after tomorrow, didn't you? Goblins have appeared around Hora village, so we're tasked with escorting people returning to the village and fending off the goblins. You were overjoyed after finding a proper job, weren't you?"
"Come to think of it, yeah, I accepted that quest, didn't I?"
They specified the date and were recruiting a team of around four adventurers, so we jumped on it.
We took the job yesterday because it was short term and close by, but this is the main event.
"… What should we do?"
"What else can we do? We need to recruit some temporary members. We already accepted a quest meant for a party of four."
"Even so, we do have a bit of a history with temporary members."
The temporary member that they recruited to replace me in the past turned out to be a member of a criminal organization, and almost ended up putting the party in peril.
Back then, I managed to pull through with my quick wits and judgement, but there's a chance that we'll end up getting caught in a similar troublesome situation.
"I doubt that'll happen again. The guild has become more wary of new and foreign adventurers after that incident too."
"Yeah, I don't think that's likely either. Well, for now, let's try and avoid anyone suspicious while recruiting."
"I got it. Give me a moment, I'll go consult with Luna-san."
Lynn walked over to Luna who was busy tidying up the counter, and asked something about recruiting a temporary member.
Just put up a notice on the board and wait for someone to come over, huh?
We need at least two members. It'd be best if we could get one from the thief and warrior type classes. If we could get someone who can attack from range too, that'd be nice as well.
Well, we are somewhat famous as adventurers in Axel. I'm sure people will rush to snatch up the position and we'll end up with too many candidates to choose from. I'm sure of it.
Part 3
"No one's coming…."
"Yeah…"
We were waiting out at the table near the windows, the temporary recruitment poster hanging off the edge, but no one seems to be coming.
There were quite a few people who glanced our way after seeing the notice on the board, but most of them grimaced shortly afterwards and none of them approached us.
We've been waiting since morning. It's almost noon now.
Sitting a short distance away, the Crimson Demon Yunyun hid her face behind the menu and was looking our way like she wanted to say something, but I'm too busy to play along with her today.
She just seems to be up to her usual loner stuff anyway.
"Yeah, I suppose no one would want to join the same party as the delinquent Dust."
Sitting across me, Lynn said that while looking at me with half closed eyes.
Is that so? If you are going to say such things, I have a few words of my own too.
"Hey, why don't you change into something more appealing before you start blaming me? You're lacking in both skin and sensuality. Show more of your shoulders and reveal more of your chest. They can't expect any kind of slippage to happen while adventuring. What's with that childish looking outfit? Do you even know what sex appeal is?"
"Oh shut up! I happen to like this outfit. It's all because you keep committing sexual harassment and picking fights that no one wants to approach us! It's all your fault!"
"Oh, I'm so sorry- As if! Why don't you try flaunting your meagre assets?! There are some people who actually enjoy flat chests!"
I got involved in a really troublesome bunch with just those exact tastes a short time ago, after all.
"Oh, that's it! I'm going to force my staff into your mouth and blast you right there!"
"Your ideas are way too grotesque! I'm the one who's had it. Let's take this outside. I'll properly teach you how great I am."
The two of us stood up. I think I could hear a soft feminine "Ah!" coming from close by, but I ignored it and went outside.
I crossed my arms and waited for Lynn, and she appeared after a short wait.
"Today, I'm going to teach you which one of us has the better-"
"Lightning!"
"That was close! Hey, don't just suddenly start shooting magic without saying a word! You completed your chant before coming out here again!?"
"Tsk, he dodged it. Even though he falls for this every time…"
"What a crazy woman! But you've lost your chance. Now then, what should I do? First I'll strip you and make you regret being born a woman!"
I extended my hands and wiggled my fingers.
I won't give you time to chant. From now on, it's going to be completely one-sided. You best prepare yourself.
"Please cut it out! You're bothering the other patrons! Please do this elsewhere, Dust-san, Lynn-san!"
The one who interrupted before I could attack was the receptionist Luna, a vein almost popping from her forehead as she tried to hide her anger behind a stiff smile.
Part 4
I stuck the recruitment poster on the unsold table in front of the store.
Quite a few passerbys looked over, but they only only seemed to regard me as an interesting curiosity and not a single one of them called out.
Occasionally a child would approach out of interest, only for their mothers to hurriedly snatch them away.
"Didn't I always say not to approach suspicious people?"
"Mommy, why are those people sitting on that chair over there?"
"Adults have their own issues too. Just leave them be."
Giving me one last gentle look, the mother took her child and left.
"Hey… is there a point to this?"
Is she embarrassed? Lynn, sitting next to me, absentmindedly whispered while keeping her head low.
"We don't have a choice, do we? We were forbidden from recruiting near the guild, so the only thing we could do head to crowded places and try and recruit people there."
"Even so…"
Raising our voices and getting into a fight near the guild was really bad. As a result, we were barred from recruiting people at the guild and the surrounding area.
Thus, we had no choice but to move to a store facing the main street. I wrote on the notice that we were conducting our interviews here, so there shouldn't be a problem.
"I don't want to do this in front of such a depressing store either, but we don't have a choice."
"Then go home! Why the hell do you keep coming here to disrupt my business?"
I turned around to see the owner of the general store angrily looking down at me.
Your store is already famous for not having any customers. Stop complaining about every little thing.
"Obstructing business? What are you saying? We are recruiting party members here, you know? Interested adventurers will flood over to us, and the people who're waiting for their turn to be interviewed might… end up browsing your goods to kill time."
"There aren't any. If you're going to say that, you should remain confident till the end. Look around you. There's not even a single person who came up."
"… Seems like most of the residents around here are quite shy."
"That's not it at all. If regular people see a bunch of suspicious people gathering in front of the shop, they'll be scared away instead. Lynn-chan, it must be really troublesome for you to take care of a man who just follows his base instincts like this."
"Hahaha. Even if he's loose with money and does nothing but chase skirts all day, he's still my companion. Yeah, even if it's him."
"Hey, guys, at least say that kind of stuff behind my back…"
The old man shrugged and disappeared back into his shop.
Lynn, seemingly a little less embarrassed now, raised her head up towards the sky.
I followed suit and saw clouds shaped like a school of fish lazily float across.
"It sure is peaceful."
"If it weren't for the quest we had lined up the day after tomorrow, it wouldn't be a bad idea to just laze around."
"Yeah. Well, if no one ends up coming, I suppose we can just hit up Kazuma and his party. I'm sure they're free."
"I wonder about that. I mean, they had a lot going on even before that incident with Darkness. From what I've heard, they got acknowledged after taking down the Demon King's Generals and got summoned to the capital."
"Sigh… Kazuma sure is doing good for himself."
"Are you jealous of him? If you accomplish something big, I'm sure even you might end up getting an audience with Princess Iris too."
Lynn nudged me with her elbow.
I know she's just teasing me, but hearing the word princess made me tremble a little.
"I can't say I have much interest in that. Just thinking about getting involved with royalty and the nobility gives me the chills."
Just remembering that time makes me uncomfortable.
Princess, huh…
I couldn't help but feel a sense of irony from hearing that word come from Lynn's mouth. She resembles her so closely…
"Really? I thought you of all people would jump right on that."
"Well, too bad. I'm interested in money and women, but authority is-"
"Eh? Dust-san? What are you doing here? Did you think up some kind of new scheme?"
This voice is her, right?
Looking down, Loli Succubus was standing in front of me.
She's wearing a far more conservative outfit than usual today
Yeah, I suppose they can't wear the revealing, lingerie-like outfit that they use in the store while wandering around the city. The police will probably take them in if they were to do so.
"I haven't seen your face at the store recently. Did you run into money issues again?"
"You idiot!"
Don't talk about the succubus store in front of her!
The shop that allows men to fulfill their erotic desires in their dreams is a secret only known to the male adventurers.
"Oh, you're the girl who helped us a while ago, right? Long time no see. Anyway, what shop are you talking about?"
"Um, hello. Er, about that, the shop is, err… it's definitely not a suspicious shop of any kind…"
Don't glance at me with those pleading eyes.
Loli Succubus really is bad at thinking on her feet.
Just hearing you speak of it makes it sound suspicious.
"She gets stage fright easily, so she's really bad at talking with unfamiliar people. The shop she mentioned is a cafe that I frequently visit. Their uniforms are a little lewd, so that's one of my favourite places to go."
"Ah, I see. It might be your job, but I'm sure it's troublesome to deal with this fellow."
"Not at all. He did help us out when we were in trouble. He has a lot of problems, but he's… somewhat reliable, I guess?"
"Oh? Dust is reliable?"
I'm getting some rare praise for once.
Stop looking at me with such naked suspicion, Lynn.
"It says you're recruiting members. Did something happen?"
"Two of our companions fell ill, and we have a job lined up for the day after tomorrow. That's why we're recruiting people."
"Is that so? It must be hard on you two."
"Thanks. Oh, I know. Would you like join us? You know a spell that can control the dreams of others, so I'm sure you can cast other spells too, right? It'd be a great help if you could lend us a hand."
"No, that's the only spell I can properly cast, and I've never been on an adventure before, so I'll just slow you down…"
She's looking at me with that pleading gaze of hers again.
Oh, yeah, I think I lied that she was a beginner Mage when I introduced her to the party.
There'll only be problems if we were to bring her along, so I suppose I should give her a hand.
"Lynn, she doesn't know any spells that can be used in battle. She won't of any help even if you bring her along. Ah, how about this, if we really can't find enough people, we can call her in to fill up the roster. What do you think?"
"Ah, I'm fine with that. If you really can't find enough people, you can call on me. Now then, I need to get to work, so please excuse me."
"Sorry for holding you up. Thanks for back then~"
Lynn waved her goodbye, and, after a short bow, Loli Succubus took her leave.
"What a sweet girl. I can't believe she's your acquaintance."
"She may look like that, but she has issues of her own. But… nevermind."
"We can't take that quest unless we have four people, so if it really comes down to that, we'll have to call her up."
"I'll consider if it we really can't find enough people. Ah, someone seems to be ap…proach…ing…"
I caught someone approaching out of the corner of my eye, but when I turned to face them, standing right there was a blond-haired woman wearing a set of metal armour.
"Crap, it's you."
I know that person. She's the vanguard of Kazuma's party, the Crusader Darkness.
She has a really hot body and is unparalleled when it comes to defence, but…
"Hey, it's pretty rude to become that disappointed upon seeing someone. I saw your recruitment poster at the guild and purposely came all the way out here after hearing the details from Luna. If you need people, what about me?"
"Rejected."
I immediately refused. I've already gone through a horrible experience after getting involved with them in the past, so there's no need to even consider the offer.
"Hey, Dust! Didn't you say that you'll go ask Kazuma's party if no one shows up? You've teamed up with them in the past, right?"
"Yeah, I did fill in for Darkness back when she dropped out, but, Lynn, listen. Yes, I did say to hit up Kazuma's party. But that's only under the condition that Kazuma comes with us. The others aren't people that we can handle without their guardian around. Or, what, are you confident that you'll be able to control those wild beasts without a chain or a whip, Lynn?"
"What are you saying in front of the person in question? What, is this some kind of reward?"
Seeing Darkness blush and start breathing heavily, Lynn recoiled slightly.
Seems like she has a better understanding of just how dangerous she is now.
"Your attacks never land, your only virtue is your toughness, and on top of that, you recklessly charge into monsters on sight and gleefully take their attacks head on. Shall I go on?
As I started counting her problems with my fingers, Darkness started fidgeting in front of me.
"It's a little embarrassing to be told that again. This feels a little different from the usual embarrassment play…"
"…"
Lynn was speechless in the face of Darkness's reaction. It seems like she's at a complete loss as to how to respond.
"Besides, what happened to Kazuma? Couldn't you just go adventuring with your companions?"
"Well, after he wiped out his debt and received a windfall on top of that, he has refused to come out of his house. That man is really…"
Kazuma lost his motivation to work, huh? That means there's no longer any reason to hire Darkness.
I really do wish he'd stop abandoning those three problem children, though.
"In the first place, do you even have time for this? Weren't you acting as the lord of this town in place of your father after the old Lord disappeared? I've heard that you've been running around dealing with the various issues in his place on account of his health. Do you really have time to be working as an adventurer?"
I interrogated her to find some reason to chase her away.
"That's true, but I've accumulated a lot of stress after doing work that I'm not used to. Getting tormen… the chance to beat up some monsters would be a nice change of pace, so I thought I would accept a quest or two."
"It's too late to put on a proper front now. You only came here because the other parties rejected you, right?"
"Gurk."
Seems like I hit it right on the nail. The people with Kazuma are famous for having more than a few quirks, after all. My body wouldn't last if I were to pair up with her.
"I have no intention of hiring you. Please leave."
"Y-You better remember this. Subjecting me to such embarrassment in front of so many people… doesn't feel so bad. Am I hopeless?"
After leaving such dangerous parting words, she wandered off somewhere.
Darkness is completely hopeless.
If only she didn't have that personality, that kind of fetish, she'd be a pretty exemplary woman. It really is a pity.
"I've heard rumours of Darkness's personality before, but… You really can't judge books by their cover."
Lynn folded her arms and mumbled as she watched Darkness's back slowly fade into the crowd.
Reality can be cruel at times. Even though she has both status and great looks. What a waste.
"Oh, I wondered what you were doing to make Darkness angry like that. So you're recruiting members?"
"… Another problem child has come."
The one who appeared in her place was the explosion girl with a screw loose, the Crimson Demon Megumin.
I had a bad feeling when I heard the story from Darkness. To think that she would show up too…
"Hoho, recruiting members, huh? You're like all the bad points of Kazuma concentrated into the form of a man, but very well. I have some free time, so if you have need of the skills of the exalted wielder of Explosion Magic-"
"I do not."
I rejected her out of hand.
I'm looking for party members that I can rely on, not opening a daycare for problem children.
"I'm still in the middle of my speech! This is Explosion, you know?! The same spell that took out various Demon King's generals! Don't you have any interest-"
"Not at all!"
"Why not! This is your first and last chance to recruit a wielder of the strongest offensive spell, Explosion, into your party! Right now I'll join you for the price of dinner!"
If she's pleading with me so desperately, that means that, like Darkness, she was rejected by the other adventurers in the guild.
What the explosion girl said isn't wrong. True, I have no complaints as far as destructive power goes.
However-
"I don't need a horribly expensive spell that can only be used once. There's no need for such firepower when we are going up against goblins. Please leave."
I pointed towards the main street, but Megumin made no movements to leave.
Glancing at Lynn out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that she had a conflicted expression for some reason.
She probably had some measure of respect for her as a mage, but after hearing of the trouble she causes every day… Yeah, that's the face I'd make too.
"Now, let's start the interview. I may not look like it, but I have a lot of experience with part time jobs, so I'm used to interviews."
She ignored my words and sat down opposite me.
You really should share some of that brazenness with Yunyun.
"I'm surprised that you can hold down a part time job with your personality."
"Eh, well, I'm pretty beautiful."
"Is that really something you yourself should say? Anyway, what interview? I already turned you down."
"Heh, I haven't lived such a soft life that I'd back down from that level of rejection. I'm not leaving unless you tearfully beg me with 'Take the leftovers if you want, just please don't come back here again!' or something of that level."
That's being way too wilful.
I need to find a way to get rid of this strangely passionate girl.
It's just a simple recruitment drive. Why the hell am I experiencing so much hardship?
"What should we do, Dust?"
Lynn whispered into my ear.
"Just leave it to me."
I whispered back.
Doesn't look like simply waiting for her to give up and go home would work. Very well, let's go through the motions of an interview. She should be happy with that.
"Right, let's start the interview. We are looking for members for an escort and goblin extermination quest. Why don't you start with telling us your strong points?"
"My pride is my overwhelming firepower! No matter what kind of enemy I face, I will blow them away in a flash!"
She confidently stood up and struck a pose with her staff.
"I see, overwhelming firepower is your strong point. Then, if goblins suddenly charge at you from four directions, what would you do?"
And the moment I said that, her headstrong demeanour vanished as she shyly sat back down and averted her gaze.
"That's… Well…."
"Would you please properly answer the question? What exactly would you do if goblins surrounded you? It'll be problematic for us too if you don't clearly answer that. Ah, pretending to be hurt? Please stop that, it's making it seem like I've wrong you."
I repeatedly rapped on the table.
In this kind of situation, one should politely but aggressively pick at her faults.
"Oh wooow."
Lynn was looking at me with cold eyes. What's up with that? You'll be caught up in whatever trouble this girl stirs up if I don't chase her away, you know?
"Err, well, I'll cast explosion on the largest group of goblins…"
"I see. Several goblins were sent flying by that one blast. There are still over a dozen of them remaining. Please tell us what you'll do next."
"About that… Errr…"
"Please answer the question. There's no way you're going to say that you'll just lay down, take a nap, and not do anything, right? What are you going to do while your companions are struggling for their lives? If you don't tell us that, it'd be hard for us-"
Before I could finish, Megumin stood up and wordlessly hurried away.
After meeting up with Darkness, who was keeping an eye on us from quite some distance away, the two of them seemed to discuss something.
After a short while, Megumin pointed her staff in our direction, and Darkness grabbed her from behind in a nelson hold.
… What the hell are they doing?
"Isn't that a bit harsh? You could've rejected her more gently."
"You don't know, but once you've heard of the trouble this explosion girl stirs up from Kazuma and Yunyun, you'll be extremely thankful for my what I just did."
Plus, if the explosion girl has joined us, there'd be two mages in the party. The party balance would've been completely skewed.
In an actual battle, I, as the only warrior, won't be able to carry the immobile Megumin and protect Lynn at the same time.
It'd be fine if it was just me, but I can't possibly put Lynn in such danger.
"I don't think she's that horrible."
"In the future, you should stick with their party for a time when Kazuma is around. You'll know exactly what I'm talking about. Things will probably turn out fine if Kazuma is around… Probably."
"I can't help but feel unnerved when you put it that way…"
"You'll know exactly how blessed you are to be in a party as normal as ours… Oh, come on, are you serious? Please, just give me a break already."
Another woman approached us.
Judging from the pattern, yeah, I should've expected this.
The blue-haired priest of the troublesome cult, the self-proclaimed goddess.
"You were the one I revived before… what was it again?"
"It's Dust! I told you my name just before, didn't I? Well, you really helped me a lot back then. Thanks for that."
I still owe her from she brought me back after I got half dissolved by the hydra, so I can't bring myself to be too harsh on her.
"Oh, yeah, that was your name. So, anyway, what are you doing recruiting members out here?"
"We got kicked out of the guild. Anyway, we got enough people, so we were just about to close up shop."
I should beat a hasty retreat before she starts clamouring to join our party.
Her skills as a priest are very highly praised, but as far as personality goes, she's far more troublesome than the other two, or so I've heard from Kazuma.
Indeed, back when I adventuring with Kazuma, he had his hands full trying to manage her.
I did want a healer in our party, but this girl is out of the question.
"Hold on, come with me."
Lynn stood and up pulled me over next to a corner of the shop.
"It's pretty bold of you to drag a man off to a shady spot in broad daylight, you know?"
"Stop fooling around. Why are you deciding things for yourself? That's the Archpriest that revived you, Aqua-san, right? Shouldn't we be welcoming someone that amazing?"
"You don't get it at all. Sure, her skills as a priest are top notch. I'll admit that. But she is the one that Kazuma points out as the most troublesome of the three problem children. Incidentally, I agree with his assessment."
"But she's a priest, isn't she? A member of the clergy shouldn't be too troublesome-"
"You know she's a priest of the Axis Cult, right?"
The Axis cult is so troublesome that even the Demon King's army is rumoured to give them a wide berth.
A priest of such a cult is nothing but grounds for concern. Furthermore, she's an oddball who constantly proclaims herself to be a goddess.
"B-But, we've always wanted a priest in our party…"
"Yeah, as long as they aren't an Axis Cultist."
"Hey, what are you guys talking about? It's really lonely to be ignored like this, you know?"
Aqua's voice sounded from behind us.
Looking back, I saw Aqua leaning over the table and looking at us.
"Sorry, we had a little something to discuss. Anyway, if you're here for the member recruitment notice, I'm sorry, but as I mentioned previously, we already settled that matter."
"But Darkness and Megumin both said that it hasn't been settled yet."
Dammit, she heard about this from them?
Why the hell did this girl approach us after she knows that we turned them down?
"In that case, let me join your party. Even if you die, I'll be able to resurrect you immediately! I'll accept it for the cost of drinks."
That certainly sounds appealing. I've been revived by her before, so I know that she isn't lying about it.
But there are too many cons to that one pro.
"Other than that, I can instantly purify undead too."
"Sadly, we're going goblin hunting, so we don't have a need for that."
"Goblins, huh? As long as it isn't Giant Toads, I'm fine with anything! I really don't want to end up getting slimed again."
So she's bad with frogs. I should've lied that we were going frog hunting.
Unlike the other two, she has no issues as far as abilities go, so it's hard to refuse her. Should I just take her along? However…
Looking behind her, I could see the other two that I just rejected staring at us from behind a bush.
One of them might still be fine, but I have absolutely no confidence in being able to watch over all three of them.
Is there really no way to get them to give up?! Come on, there has got to be a way… Oh, yeah, I recall hearing this before. I should give it a shot.
"The truth is, Sir Vanir has agreed to help me."
"Whaaat!? You're adventuring together with that shitty devil? What are you thinking? He's an existence akin to a patch of stubborn dirt stuck to the toilet that won't come off no matter how many times you scrub it, you know?"
"T-That's going too far. Anyway, Sir Vanir has kindly offered to accompany us. If you don't mind being together with him, you're free to come with us."
"Of course not! There's no way a goddess like me would adventure together with a devil!"
She really doesn't let go of that goddess thing, does she?
It's pretty impressive that she can keep up a lie like that.
"Is that so? Well, that's a pity. Feel free to hit us up again if there's another chance."
"It's best that you stop associating with that sort of thing. Take this as a gentle warning from a goddess."
"Yeah, I'll be sure to keep that in mind."
I waved her off as she left the table, and triumphantly punched through the air the moment she's out of sight.
I successfully chased the problem child away! Job well done! I should go back to the guild and grab a cold one.
"Well, that wraps things up nicely."
I turned towards Lynn, and she replied with a sigh.
"You know, we haven't wrapped anything up at all. We still haven't recruited a single member."
"… Ah."
Dealing with them took so much of my efforts that I completely forgot about recruiting members.
Yeah, our original goal was to recruit two members for the quest we have lined up the day after tomorrow.
At this rate, we'll have to end up refunding the advance payment.
"What should we do? I don't have any money."
"Why don't you have any money? You just got paid two days ago, right?"
"I've already spent it, of course. Money only stimulates the economy if it gets spent, you know?"
"You just didn't think about the future at all, right? Still, this is a problem. It'd be nice if we knew some adventurers who happened to be free right now."
"Seriously, what should we do?"
"Actually, shouldn't we respond to her? I'm starting to feel sorry for her. She's been glancing at us even back when we were at the guild."
Lynn glanced off somewhere, but I already know who she's looking at, so I couldn't be bothered to follow her gaze.
"You've noticed it too, huh?"
She's been shadowing us from quite some distance away ever since we sat down in front of this store, constantly attempting to approach us only to get second thoughts halfway and head back. An extremely suspicious person caught in a loop.
She has a pretty good figure for her age, and on top of that, she's a Crimson Demon Archwizard capable of wielding advanced magic.
Despite that, she always ends up operating alone, the loner Magician Yunyun.
"It's not like we are unfamiliar with each other. She could've just called out to us."
"She doesn't get along with others. It's a pretty famous rumour amongst us adventurers."
Rather than not getting well with others, it's more like she's simply bad at dealing with strangers.
Even though she's been shooting me gazes like she has something she wants to say to me.
"Hmm, I guess I'll invite her. She's just been extruding an aura of 'I want to join your party.'"
"She looks really pure, so I really don't want to let her into our party. It feels like she'll end up getting corrupted by you or Keith."
"What does that mean? Anyway, she's just here as a temporary member, so there's no need to worry about that. In the first place, Yunyun and I are already friends. Even after you rejected her."
I tried to introduce Yunyun to Lynn in an attempt to help her make friends, but Lynn read too deeply into it and turned her down.
"Obviously I'd be suspicious of a request from you. I didn't expect it to be taken at face value. I was sure you were playing some kind of trick."
"You were the one who had the misunderstanding. Even I too have occasions where I do something out of the goodness of my heart."
"Yeah, like once every year, right?"
"Should I seal those lips with mine so that they'll never talk back to me again?"
"Go ahead if you dare. I'll mail your underwear to that nobleman who likes you so very much!"
"Hey, don't do that! Can you still call yourself human?"
I don't get why she's that angry with me, but that's a no go. It was a really traumatic event for me.
Yunyun continued pacing in and out of the corner of my eye as we squabbled with each other.
Seems like she'll be stuck like this for eternity unless I call out to her.
"I'm really starting to feel sorry for her, so call out to her, Dust."
"No, wait, if we let her into the party, there'd be two mages. That would form an unbalanced party, wouldn't it?"
"There wouldn't be any issues from recruiting such an exceptional Archwizard. Come on, she's starting to tear up because she doesn't have the courage to approach us."
She's gotten pretty close a few times, but she just can't seem to take the final step.
If Lynn weren't here, she'd probably be able to talk to me without hesitation.
Fine, guess I'll call out to her.
"Oh, isn't that Yunyun? What's up? Are you here to lend me money? If you want to invite me to a meal, pick a place with good sake. Of course, it'd be your treat."
"I'm not lending you money, and I'm not treating you either. Er, I-what a coincidence. What are you doing out here?"
The way she happily ran towards me reminded me of a dog happily wagging its tail as it runs up to greet its owner.
She seems to be trying to act like she just noticed our presence, but her acting skills are horribly lacking.
Every time she tried to hide the fact that she's a loner, her acting is so bad that I can't bear to look at her. It'd be great if she could become a little more shameless, like me.
"Ah, two of our party members came down with something. We're recruiting temporary replacements right now."
"Eh-. Is that so-? That's a problem, isn't it-?"
I even gave you a hook. Should you really react that way? Why are you speaking in a monotone?
I should probably invite her right now… but in order to help her overcome her communication problems, I guess I'll keep this conversation going for a while.
Your future will be really dark if you can't overcome this by yourself.
"Yeah, it is. Well, no one is coming, so I was thinking that it's time to close up shop and go bug a couple of my acquaintances."
"I-I see. Umm, if you are in trouble…"
"Huh? You're too soft, I can't hear you. Is there something you want to tell me? And are you sure you don't want to do that embarrassing self introduction of yours?"
"That's something like a law in my village, it's not like I particularly like to do it. Anyway, you see, umm, well, if you don't have enough people… err…"
She's looking down and playing with her fingers, but she still can't properly speak up.
Even though she is much more confident in front of me and that explosion girl.
"Stop bullying her, Dust. If you'd like, would you like to join our party for a few days? Don't worry, you'll get a share of the rewards too."
Lynn pushed me aside and butted into the conversation.
Seems like she got irritated by the back and forth that Yunyun and I were doing.
"Can I really?"
"Yeah. Can I count on you?"
"Yes! I'm not very well versed in this, but I'll be in your care!"
Yunyun gave Lynn an exaggerated bow. She must be really happy to hear that.
We are the ones who are requesting stuff off her, but it feels like the exact opposite.
"Yeah, we'll be glad to have you. Drop by the guild tomorrow… well, you're always there. Anyway, I'll call out to you, so wait for me."
"I understand! I'll be waiting!"
And she happily skipped away. Everything about Yunyun right now is just radiating happiness.
There's nothing to complain about as far as her combat ability goes. In fact, it feels like she'd be fine even if she were to go alone, but since she's willing to help us out, there's no reason to deny her.
"We managed to secure one member for now."
"The sun is starting to set, so let's continue this tomorrow. I'm sure we'll be able to get the last member somehow."
"I'm not quite sure I agree with your optimism, but it'll probably work out."
I returned the table and chair back to their original position in the store, and Lynn met with the shopkeeper to apologize about something.
It won't sell anyway, so there's no need to be that particular about it,
There's still one more day till the dateline, so let's get some dinner, grab a drink and sleep.
Worry about tomorrow's problems tomorrow.
Part 5
As I sat at my usual place in the guild and helped myself to breakfast while stifling a yawn, a certain woman sat down opposite me and glared at me.
"I couldn't find anyone. So, regarding the incident yesterday where you said leave it to me, got into a fight some other adventurers, and spent the night in the detention cells, what kind of excuse do you have for that?"
"It's not my fault. They were the ones who brought up the money I owed them when I tried to recruit them into the party."
Apart from Lynn, who was pouting about being unable to secure the fourth member, there's also a fretting Yunyun sitting at the table.
"W-What should we do? The quest requires four people, right?"
Yunyun, who was probably really looking forward to this, seemed quite worked up.
She was reading books like "The Beginner's Guide to Your First Party" and "How to Communicate Well with Others" the whole day in the guild, after all.
She even prepared a large bag filled to the brim with snacks for use during the adventure. Well, I ate some of them in place of breakfast to lighten our load a little, and she tearfully chased me after that.
"Don't worry, I called her over."
I waved at the girl as she walked through the door, and she made her way over to the table.
"This will be my first adventure, so please take care of me."
The girl was Loli Succubus. I visited her earlier this morning, and she agreed to my request.
She was dressed like a proper mage today.
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---------------------------->
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A party with one vanguard and three spellcasters. This is about as unbalanced a party composition as you can get, but I just have to find a way to make this work out.
"Sorry for dragging you along with-"
"N-Nice to meet you! I'm Yunyun, a Crimson Demon! My hobbies are games I can play by myself and reading! I'm always looking for new friends!"
Why is Yunyun so tense? This isn't a marriage interview, you know?
She really is bad at dealing with unfamiliar faces. I can sense her tension just by standing next to her.
"Nice to meet you, Yunyun-san. I'm… Lolisa."
That's the fake name I came up with this morning.
It seems like Devils find it inconvenient to reveal their real names, so I thought of a fitting alias for her.
This way, even if I accidentally call her Loli Succubus by mistake, we'll be able to easily smooth things over.
"Everyone's a spellcaster too, right? Please take care of me, Senpais."
"Senpai… That sounds pretty good."
The corner of Lynn's lips curled.
Hmm? The person who'd be most happy at being called senpai seems oddly quiet.
Looking down at Yunyun, she was clutching her cheeks with both hands and fluffing about.
"Ehehe- Senpai… I'll have to brag to Megumin about this later."
Seems like she's far happier than I expected.
Wait, this just came to me, but… Isn't this a harem party!?
Just like Kazuma's party, there are three women and a man.
This should be a great thing for me, but…
Yunyun has great looks, but she's way too young.
Loli Succubus is supposed to be far older than I am, but as far as appearances go, she's the youngest one present.
That leaves Lynn. She has a harsh personality and a somewhat pitiful chest, but, well, everything else is just my type.
Still, I'll definitely receive some form of punishment if I were to complain about this situation. There are tons of sausage parties in the guild itself. This party is like heaven compared to those.
Even now, the other men in the guild are shooting me envious gazes.
Damn, this feels good.
"Right, let's get going!"
"It's really rare for you to be this motivated. You're not thinking about something weird, are you?"
"Not at all."
So don't glare at me like that. Lynn's surprisingly sharp at the strangest of times, that's why she's so troublesome.
If I impress them with my manliness right now, it's possible that Loli Succubus might introduce me to some of her more bountiful colleagues, or Yunyun to one of her few friends.
… No, I suppose it's too unreasonable to hope for that second bit.
Still, I can show off my good points to Lynn during this adventure and have her change the way she looks at me.