The next day, John was lying on the bed in his room, feeling profoundly depressed. He kept replaying the scene where he was stabbed in the neck, the chest, and his hands, the pain and the fear fresh in his memory. Further, he thought about how his grandfather, Leonidas, had looked at him with such palpable disappointment and disgust.
"Why did I think I can be some kind of hero? What is wrong with me?"
John's complexion was deathly pale as he had not drunk any blood or eaten any meat since the previous day. While he was lying there, lost in the crushing weight of his failure, he heard a knock on the door.
*Knock knock*
John did not say anything.
"John, it's me, Carmilla. I heard what happened, may I come in?"
John did not respond, trapped in his own head. "Why did I go save the man from those bad men? What if I was a normal human? I wouldn't be alive. How did I become such an idiot?"
Carmilla stood by the door, not realizing John hadn't heard her. "John, talk to me, please." She waited for an answer for two minutes, only silence greeting her.
*Knock knock*
"I am coming in, John."
Carmilla slowly turned the doorknob and walked into John's room. She saw that John was pale white. "John, are you okay?"
John did not respond to her calling. He was still lying on the bed and looking at the ceiling. Carmilla walked over to the bed and took a seat next to him.
"John," Carmilla called his name again. John finally heard her and turned his neck to look at her. He looked at Carmilla for a few seconds and then turned his head back, staring at the ceiling. "Leave me alone, Carmilla."
"John, I am worried about you. Why don't you drink any blood? You look so pale." Carmilla hated to see John like this; he always had a smile on his face. "John, is there anything that I can do for you?"
John then looked at Carmilla. "Please, I want to be alone."
Carmilla said nothing and only nodded her head. She gently touched his hand, offered a small, silent reassurance, and walked out of the room. When she closed the door, Anna was standing outside with a worried expression on her face. "How is he?"
Carmilla shook her head, unable to offer any good news.
Anna then walked to the door. "John dear, it's Grandma. I am coming in."
Anna walked into the room and took a seat next to John. "John dear, Grandma is worried about you. Please come to dinner. Let us eat as a family; maybe you will feel better."
John was silent for a few seconds before asking the question that tormented him. "Grandma, am I a failure?"
"You will never be a failure, John. Grandma loves you so much. Please get up and come to dinner."
John said nothing and only looked at his grandmother. Anna stood up and held out her hand. "Come, John."
John was hesitant, but he reached out and took her hand, pulling himself out of bed.
Afterward, when John and his grandmother arrived at the dining hall, some of the Crimson family members were already seated at the dinner table: Leonidas, Carmilla, Cassandra, Thomas (Markus's son), Richard (Markus's son), Reina, and a few others. The remaining members of the Crimsons were away on their own missions.
When John found his seat, he kept his head down, avoiding eye contact with any of the members at the table. Reina, who had been his temporary teacher, felt bad seeing John so diminished and chose not to speak.
The vampire maids then arrived with blood and food. Anna, who was sitting next to John, stood up. She looked at everybody sitting at the table and smiled warmly. "I am so glad to see you all here this evening. It warms my heart to be able to sit with my family and have a lovely dinner. I want you all to know that I love you, and please enjoy the food that is present on the table."
Leonidas looked at Anna. "You look exquisite tonight, honey." Anna smiled sweetly at Leonidas's rare compliment. "Thank you, my dear husband."
While everybody was eating, John did not touch his food or blood, keeping his head bowed. Anna looked worried. "John, darling, please drink your blood. Grandma doesn't like to see you this pale."
John then lifted his head up to look at his grandmother and nodded. He brought the glass full of blood near his mouth and forced himself to drink a single mouthful. He swallowed the blood with difficulty before putting the glass back on the table.
Leonidas then spoke, his voice carrying the authority of the patriarch. "Thomas, I heard you beat the boy who challenged you to combat with little difficulty. You make the Crimson family proud, son. And Richard, I heard you completed your mission successfully. Keep up the good work."
Both boys felt happy at their grandfather's compliment. "Thank you, Grandfather." John looked in the direction of his grandfather and witnessed Leonidas pat Thomas on the back, a gesture John knew he would never receive.
John then stood up abruptly. "I am not hungry anymore. I am going to my room."
When John stood up, Anna said, "John, please," but Leonidas interjected. "Let the boy go. He is a weakling."
"Leonidas, don't start now!" Anna admonished.
John did not say anything and just kept walking. Everybody afterwards said nothing and quietly ate their dinner in an atmosphere heavy with unspoken tension.
Later that evening, while John was lying on his bed, feeling depressed and utterly alone, he heard a knocking on the door.
*Knock knock*
John heard the knocking this time and did not want to talk to anybody. "Who is it? Please leave me alone."
Then someone answered, their voice calm and steady. "It is me, Young Master, Elena."