Disclaimer: I own nothing but my original characters and works; all other characters and worlds belong to their respective owners. I'm just playing with them.
Betad by priapus, Marethyu, Malcolm Tent
The Damned
Chapter 01: The Nautiloid.
Okay, this isn't my finest moment, I'll admit. I didn't really think this through. See, I've always been told that I'm too 'impulsive' and 'reckless', and that it's going to get me into trouble.
Well, I suppose it's not me who is in trouble right now.
They also told me that my temper was dangerous to myself and those around me. Guess they were right about that. Who knew?
Sighing, I continue shovelling the dirt back into the hole.
"Look, in my defence, I did literally say so. I said if you hit her again, I'd kill you. You hit her again, and here we are," I say, shrugging as the body in the pit writhes, the ropes not shifting. Eagle Scout, baby. I know how to tie a knot. "Hey, don't look at me like that. I literally told you so. This could not have been more foreseeable. Now, can you please stop struggling so much? You're going to bleed out either way. A little dirt isn't going to hurt."
Making sure the next load hits his face, I see it squirm as very muffled noises drift from my hole. Oh, they are definitely going to find this spot. I really should have thought this one through. I mean, at least three people saw me swerve off the road to run him over.
Man, why does Julia have such shit taste in men? She is five for five on dipshit boyfriends. I love my little sister, truly I do. I wouldn't be burying her abusive, cheating boyfriend in a freshly-dug grave in the middle of the forest if I didn't. But god damn does she have poor taste.
Man, there's still a lot of dirt to go. They're gonna find him anyway, so why am I even trying? Sighing, I hop down into the hole and shift the majority of the dirt off his face. Despite my running him over, beating him with a baseball bat and attempting to bury him alive, he looks oddly relieved. Not the smartest cookie, huh?
His relief lasts right up until I raise the shovel high and his eyes widen, my foot on his chest preventing him from squirming. His muffled cries increase in volume and intensity as I bring it down on his head, the metal cracking his skull open. With a yell, I bring it down again and again, panting. Taking a moment to spit down at him, I grab my vest and bring it to my face to wipe away the sweat and blood. It's not like it can get any dirtier at this point.
Man, I dug one deep ass hole. I'm kinda proud of it.
"Need a hand?" someone asks, peering down into the open grave. "Rough night?"
"I've had better," I admit with a shrug.
"Been there," the figure admits, offering a hand. After a moment, I shrug. What do I have to lose? Taking his hand, I grunt in surprise as he lifts me out of the hole with zero effort. I stare in befuddlement for just a moment, awed by his strength, before I notice something a little… odd.
"Are you Satan?" I ask, watching him pause. Red skin, check. Big ass horns, check. Menacing smirk? Actually, not check. He's just kinda beaming at me. "Because if you are, I've got a great, slightly used, blood sacrifice right here."
"Nah, Satan's a bit of a bitch anyway. I'm Sett!" Sett greets, pausing to look at my hole. With a wave of his hand, the dirt fills in my grave, grass regrows, and a fucking tree sprouts out of it. In an instant, there's a whole ass oak tree where the clearing once was.
"Hi, Sett," I respond just as casually, his smile growing a little. "So you didn't come for my soul?"
"Nah- wait, no, that's basically it. It's not that bad, though. No eternal torment, unless you fuck up real bad," Sett reassures me, rubbing the back of his neck with a laugh. "So, you ever watch Isekai anime?"
"It's the most generic slop, so obviously," I agree with a laugh.
"Yeah, it's basically that. I'm just nicer than a truck. I was kinda tempted to use the truck, because hitting you in the middle of the forest would have been really funny," Sett admits sheepishly.
I pause, considering things. If I'd crawled out of that hole, just to get hit by a truck in the middle of the woods… yeah, that would have been pretty funny.
"You don't seem very surprised," Sett says, hands in his pockets.
"Eh. It's that kind of night," I agree with a shrug. "Do I get overpowered bullshit?"
"Kinda comes with the genre. As long as you have decent luck, you'll be fine," Sett drags out, very unconvincingly. "Okay, I'll be real with you. My partner- not the sex way, the bros way- is kinda a petty dick, and he had a really hard time with his start, and he's holding it against everyone, and he kinda fucked your start up a little bit. Something about suffering as he had. But, I think that's a little unfair, so I'm willing to grant a small wish to make up for Arthur being a petty bitch. That's if you're interested. No harm if you don't want to. It's why I don't like using the truck."
"What do I have to lose? Can you make sure Julia is taken care of? She's honestly a fucking moron sometimes, and the way I see it, it's this or jail for me," I admit. Sett pauses for a moment before he grins.
"Oh yeah, that's perfect. Yeah, consider it done. She'll be fiiiine," Sett once again drags out, once again unconvincingly.
Summon (Companion) added
[Julia Edwards] - Mythical
Your little sister!
"Wait, no, not like that-"
"Too late, already did it. Have fun!" Sett cheers encouragingly.
The ground swallows me as my final view is him waving goodbye, but my mind is elsewhere. No, just no. I did not spend my whole-ass life babysitting Miss Bad Decisions herself to have her sent along with me. That's just not fair!
Starter Build Loaded
Major Curse Added
[The Dark Urge]
You are a chosen of Bhaal, his attention fixed upon you. As a Bhaalspawn, you are afflicted with an intense, almost alien bloodlust. Once a week, you must sacrifice a soul to him to keep his favour and gain his boons. Should you fail, you will feel his wrath instead. Control your Urge or submit to its call.
The fuck? Oh, right, Sett's not-sex friend. Man, fuck him.
Bhaalspawn, huh? I swear I know that term from somewhere, but it ain't clicking.
Ultimate Curse Added
[Slaughterhouse Nine]
The Slaughterhouse Nine are after you, either to recruit or to deal with you. If you are in Worm, they will divert to your location within three months, and if you aren't, a group of similar power and goals will form in your world and will come for you within the next year.
Starter build complete.
I repeat… the fuck? My starter build is just serial killer urges, and oh, by the way, get hunted nerd. Who pissed in this dude's coffee? I mean, I can't pretend my hands are clean given the way Sett found me, but come on, dude.
Wait. 'If you are in Worm'? Meaning, I'm going to a 'fictional' world, and Worm is a possibility? I uhh, don't love that, not gonna lie. If I had to make a list of worlds I really don't want to visit, Worm would be pretty up there.
Although… consider this. Panpan. I must contemplate this.
Whoever gave me this is still a bitch, though.
Ultimate Curse Added
[The Brand]
This curse will place a brand upon your neck, which will be extremely painful. This brand will cause Blood Moons once a week, in which monsters of all types will spawn and attack you throughout the night. Your brand will burn whenever a monster is nearby.
Gritting my teeth, I let out a hiss of pain as a bright red mark burns itself into my skin. Motherfucker, you think I don't recognise a Berserk reference?
Wait, it said my build was done. Are you just adding more because I'm talking shit?
Yes.
Man, you can kiss my whole entire asshole. Putting the Bastard in Random Omnipotent Bastard today, huh?
Feat Achieved: Amuse Arthur (Two Rolls granted)
As information about my 'system' forces its way into my head, I grit my teeth again. I'm sure they have an easier way of doing this shit that doesn't hurt nearly as much.
Yes, we do.
I like Sett better than you.
Five Starter Rolls granted. Rolling Seven Rolls.
Results: Uncommon, Rare, Rare, Rare, Epic, Epic, Mythical.
I knew that fucker was contagious. This is the last time he gets to meet a Gacha gamer in person.
Cool story, bro, but I didn't ask.
You know I can give you more curses, right?
I know you can suck my balls.
Ultimate Curse Added
[The Little Sister]
[Julia Edwards] is now permanently summoned and cannot be dismissed.
Message received, I'm sorry.
Sorry that you're such a dick.
[Pyrokinesis: Blaze] - Uncommon
Allows you to produce and control flames, allowing you to unleash streams of fire, fire arrows, fire whips, walls of fire, etc.
As my hands ignite in flames, I ignore Arthur to fanboy over the fact that I have fucking superpowers. This is so much better than jail.
[Goth Magnet] - Rare
Goths and emos are drawn to you for some reason, making it easier for you to garner affection and favour from goths or girls with daddy issues. In addition, people turn a blind eye to your less-than-favourable actions more easily, just like how those fathers turned a blind eye to their daughters.
Praise be to the gacha gods. I've always been lucky when it comes to pulls, but this is clearly an UR pull. Wait, hold up. Julia doesn't count, right?
Right?
[Impulse] - Rare
Allows you to quicken the electrical signals in your body, increasing your reflexes and speed proportionally. Overusing may cause nerve damage.
Overuse? Well, it's a good thing I'm known for my restraint and forethought, then, isn't it?
I give it a week until I cripple myself.
[Fire Absorption] - Rare
Allows you to absorb fire into your body, either storing it to release it later as your own flames or converting it into energy for your own use. But strong enough flames might be impossible or painful to absorb. Absorbing too much fire without release can cause internal burning.
So, set myself on fire and throw myself at the enemies?
[Dragon Scales] - Epic
Allows you to grow incredibly tough dragon scales over your body. Due to the nature of dragon scales, they also reduce any elemental damage you take while also being more durable than any human material. Its toughness scales with your physical stats.
Okay, that's pretty badass. So, grow dragon scales, set myself on fire and throw myself at the enemy. I can work with this.
[Oni] - Epic
Allows you to transform into an Oni, either partially or fully. As an Oni, you possess enhanced physical stats and a minor healing factor, but are vulnerable to holy.
Dragon Oni. My inner weeb is squealing right now. Turn into an oni, grow dragon scales, set myself on fire and then throw myself at the enemy. Oh yeah, it's all coming together.
[Upgrade Master] - Mythical
You are a natural when it comes to upgrading your powers. All upgrade quests are easier and grant two upgrades instead of one.
I didn't even know upgrade quests were a thing, but again, I can work with this.
Sett-up complete. Good luck.
I mean, how bad could it really be?
– Valen Edwards – About Thirty Seconds Later –
Powers, do your thing. Powers?
Struggling in the fucking Aliens-themed bdsm pod, I will myself to turn into a massive fucking Oni and rip this squid's dick off as it gestures, my head forced to remain still. Okay, fine, I'm sorry I called you a dick, can I have my fucking powers now?
The answer, as it turns out, is no as the fucking mind flayer approaches me. Great news, guys! I remembered where Bhaalspawn comes from. Bad news, guys! Eldritch brain worm.
Unable to move, I am powerless to stop the fucking mind flayer from bringing the tadpole with far too many teeth to my eye, and my first lovely experience of my new world is having it burrow into my fucking skull. Lemme tell you. This shit hurts. This shit hurts a lot. Even after it's finished digging its way into my head, the strange pressure behind my right eye is downright unpleasant.
I retract my apology. You're still a dick, and I hope you get syphilis.
I can hear distant bells, but right now I'm more focused on the immense fucking pain of having a large tadpole parasite getting real comfortable in my fucking brain. I am not exactly an expert on the Dungeons and Dragons universe. I never played the Baldur's Gate games, but I know enough to know what the fuck is going on.
Roars distract me from the pain as I see a yellow-skinned chick in the pod opposite me struggling to break free, some weird-looking elf, I think. Her struggles pause for just a moment as the wall of our store-brand xenomorph nest is torn open, and a large red head peers into our prison.
Is that a fucking dragon?
Hey, I'm one of you guys. I've got the scales and everything. Little help over here? Please?
The responding fire breath is not exactly what I hoped for, and as it hits the strange pool in the middle of the room, I can only sigh at the blast. Oh gee, if only I had some kind of power that absorbed fire, wouldn't that be crazy?
Instead, I get blasted back in my pod, my head cracking against the black, chitinous wall and know no more as my consciousness fades.
System Online.
Oh no, by all means. Take your fucking time.
– Later –
Waking up with a headache from hell, I can only groan as I open my eyes. Today has not gone quite the way I planned, and clearly, things are only going to get worse as someone tries to help me out of the pod, promptly dropping me with a quiet swear.
"Valen, wake up," she says, a hint of concern mixed in her tone as I stumble to my feet, using the remains of the pod for support. Rubbing my head, I groan as I open my eyes and see her staring at me. "Whoa, the fuck did you do to your eyes?"
I blink before taking in her features, a pair of crimson eyes staring at me, which makes me pause.
"What did I do? What did you do? Your eyes are red," I point out. "Like, glow in the dark crimson red."
"So are yours. Guess it comes with your new powers," Julia says, helping me steady myself. "So, what the fuck did you do to get into this mess? Also, it's kinda sweet and a little creepy that I was your one wish."
Leaning against the weird pod, she gives me a slight smirk as she looks around the damaged room. Her long black hair is tied back in a ponytail that's going over her right shoulder, and she's dressed in a form-fitting, lacy black dress that looks like it's come out of some fantasy novel. It isn't, that's just how she dresses.
"How much do you know?" I ask, ignoring her teasing.
"I know you got isekai'd and asked for me to come along," Julia says, entirely misinterpreting things.
"Well, I wasn't going to leave you behind. You're a fucking disaster, and you'd be dead in a month," I lie. Her derisive noise tells me she knows how full of shit I am.
"So, did you die? Was I your dying wish?" Julia asks, and I just snort.
"Someone did, but it wasn't me. Kyle's dead, by the way. I was burying the body when the demon dude found me," I admit, and just for a moment, her eyes widen and her mouth drops open. "Told you I'd fuck him up if he hit you again."
"How'd you do it?" Julia asks with an intense look on her face.
"I was driving back from work and I saw him about to cross the road, so I just ran him over, but he survived, so I pulled him into the trunk and drove off with him. Beat him with the baseball bat I keep in the backseat and then tried to bury him in the forest near our old school," I explain.
"That's not a forest, it's a fucking park. There's a kids' playground in the middle of it. There are so many better places you could have dumped the body," Julia points out.
"Yeah, well. Like four people saw me run him over anyway. I didn't exactly plan this out," I admit with a shrug. "I'm surprised nobody showed up while I was digging the hole, but I got tired trying to fill it in and just beat him to death with the shovel I stole from a shed."
"Idiot," Julia says fondly. "I was going to stab him and make it look like self-defence."
"Oh, and that's a better plan?" I ask with a snort. Somehow, I'm not surprised.
"Better than just running him over and kidnapping him. Should have kept driving, the roads would have been fairly dark, and your car is common as fuck. Make it look like an accident," Julia scoffs.
I go to argue before pausing. Shit, she's got a point.
"You never did think things through, huh? Remember Chris from middle school?" Julia asks.
"No," I reply.
"He tried to take your shiny blastoise card, and you stabbed him in the leg with a pencil. It's why they started medicating you," Julia laughs. Yeah, I don't remember that.
"Shouldn't have fucked with my stuff," I say, looking around. Huh, the weird elf is missing. Wait, did she just fuck off and leave me unconscious? Bitch. Where's the camaraderie as people who got brainfucked together?
"You're still an idiot, but you're my idiot. Thanks, Val. I owe you one. More than one, if we're being honest," Julia says, giving me a small hug before she frowns. "So, apparently I'm your 'companion'. Kinda sounds like a fancy version of calling me an escort."
"That's from Firefly, dumbass," I point out.
"Huh, oh yeah. Man, why couldn't you have gotten sent there instead?" Julia whines slightly. "The fuck did you do to get a start like this? I can see your system, even if I can't actually interact with it. What did you do to get all those curses? And why the fuck am I classed as a curse? Wait, did you shittalk the ROB?"
"What? No. Do you think I'm an idiot?" I ask, sounding offended.
"Hey, do you think the Nine will be the ones from Worm? Like Jack Slash and the rest? Because I'm not gonna lie, Jack Slash is kinda hot," Julia admits.
"Your taste in men continues to amaze me, and I don't fucking know, do I? I know as much as you do. Which is to say, fuck all," I sigh. "What I do know is that I have a fucking mind flayer parasite in my brain and that needs to go, asap."
Quest Added
[Mind Flayer Parasite]
Objective: Find a way to remove the parasite before you undergo Ceremorphosis and become a mind flayer.
Reward: You don't become a mind flayer.
"Can I have one of your powers? I know you can share them," Julia points out.
"What? No, fuck you. They're mine," I reply instantly.
"Come on, don't be a dick. I'm kinda stuck in this mess because of you, remember? I was nice and safe at home…" Julia counters. "I want a superpower too."
"Well, I have a build and I'm not making it worse by giving you one of them," I retort. "I don't think you can die, companions are basically immortal. You just go on cooldown. Err, I think."
"You think?" Julia replies, arms crossed. "Well, that's encouraging."
You are correct, Julia cannot actually die. You wanted to make sure she'd be fine, and now she'll live as long as you do.
"See? I'm right, so fuck off. They're mine," I reply smugly. "Maybe I'll give you one when I get some more. Maybe."
"You're so generous," Julia snorts, rolling her eyes.
"I know. I'm a true saint," I agree smugly. "Come on, let's try to find a way out of… wherever the fuck we are."
Quest Added
[Escape the Nautilod]
Objective: Escape from the Ilithid Nautilod before it's too late.
Optional Objective: Slay Commander Zhalk and the Mind Flayer in the Helm.
Optional Objectives: ???, ???, ???, ???
Reward: Survival. Two Rolls.
"So, any ideas where to start? Because this place looks like we're about to run into a bunch of facehuggers," Julia points out.
"See, that's what I thought. And no, how the fuck should I know?" I ask, looking around before I approach the pool, where the mind flayer got the parasite from. Nothing left inside it, thankfully, except a murky grey liquid. "Man, this shit is weird."
"Yeah, well-" Julia starts as I reach out to put my finger in the water. It turns out this was not, in fact, the play, as the apparently very volatile liquid promptly explodes and sends me flying back with a grunt. "Do you have to touch everything? You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Fire absorption took care of most of the damage. It just doesn't help with the force behind the blast," I say, brushing myself off as I feel the fire within me. I focus for a moment, closing my eyes as I convert it into energy.
I take a moment to check the pod that the elf was in, to see if she's just knocked out and slumped weird or some shit, but nope.
As we make our way through the weird room, we pause as we come across a body. Not a human or elf one, but a dead mindflayer lying near the entrance.
"Was that the one that stuck a worm in your eye?" Julia asks, kneeling down to examine it.
"I don't fucking know. It's a purple tentacle-faced asshole. They all look the same to me," I shrug.
"He's kinda hot," Julia admits after a moment as I pause and stare at her. "Would."
"Why are you the way that you are? Like, what specific undiagnosed mental illness do you have?" I ask.
"Bitch, I've seen your porn folders. Don't pretend you haven't beat your meat to worse," Julia says defensively.
"Firstly, stay off my computer. Secondly, monster girls are based. That is just a fucking squid. Plus, I think they're asexual and reproduce through the tadpoles, so you're out of luck there."
"So you technically mated with a mind flayer? And you say I'm weird?" Julia points out. I… was trying not to think about it like that, and I can't help but shudder a little before I sigh as I watch Julia fucking around with its robes, until she lets out a triumphant laugh.
"Ha! You were wrong, it has a dick," Julia points out.
"I don't wanna look at mind flayer dick," I reply.
"Because you're self-conscious that it's packing more than you?" Julia points out, rifling through the squid's pockets.
"No, and stop ogling the dead squid dick. Fucking necrophile," I sigh, watching her pull out a small white pearl with a triumphant smile. She goes to speak, before it vanishes from her hands, and we both blink.
Ability Discovered
[Julia Edwards] - Mythical
Your little sister! Julia is a living, breathing bag of holding, having an interdimensional storage space.
"Ha, you have to carry all my shit," I immediately mock. "My own little pack-mule. And here you thought you wouldn't be helpful without a power."
"Probably for the best. You're shit with money anyway," Julia shrugs. I go to argue, before pausing. Okay, yeah that's fair. "I don't wanna be broke in two worlds."
"Oh, yeah. Cause you're so much better Miss 'I can't afford rent again because I spent it all on gothic dresses'," I snort. "But yeah, I've been broke. I don't want to be broke again."
"Find more bodies to loot then?" Julia asks, getting a nod from me before I pause. Why did she just put the whole ass mindflayer in her pocket dimension? "Oi, stop looking at me like that. I just think it could be useful."
"Right… useful. Guess you're worried that Bad Dragon doesn't exist in this world, huh?" I snark as we search the place, finding a chest with some gold pieces in it before we finally move on. I do realise that the quest said 'before it's too late' and we've spent all this time arguing, but whatever. I don't wanna rush if there's shit we can loot.
We get like two rooms over before the creepiest voice I've heard in a long time calls for us.
"We are here~ HERE! Help us!" the childlike voice whispers, my mind flayer parasite responding as I clutch my head.
"That's fucking weird," Julia says, frowning. "We gonna go and investigate?"
"How stupid do you think I am? Of course I am. You stay here and-"
"Go fuck yourself," Julia replies, moving ahead as I sigh and follow her. It doesn't take us long to work out how this weird room works, the platform rising to reveal a dead naked man, an elf from his ears, his entire body twitching. Man, that's two dicks I've had to see so far. Where's the naked chicks?
"Yes! You've come to save us from this place, from this place you'll free us!" the voice replies as I share a look with Julia. That's a fucking brain. As in, the elf has the top half of his head cut off, and the brain is talking to us. How… lovely. "Free us from this shell!"
This thing does not know the meaning of moderation. The volume of its cries changes with each word, some screamed and then followed up with a whisper.
"I'm not touching that," Julia says helpfully.
"Eh, whatever," I shrug, oddly unbothered by the gore as I move around the chair like thing to where the head is lolling. How the fuck am I supposed to do this? Brains aren't meant to be this big, right? The entire head is swelling from the sheer size of the bloated brain.
Fuck it, when in doubt, use violence.
With a roar, my body grows as I call on my Oni transformation. Julia stares in shock as I grow to nearly ten foot tall, my skin growing grey as my muscles bulge. The most jarring change is my face, as a red 'mask' grows from my flesh. Only, it's not a mask, as it is fused onto my face, my mouth open wide to reveal fanged teeth and a third eye growing on my forehead, between two massive white horns.
Julia gasps as I turn to her, and I'm going to pretend I didn't see her biting her lip. Oh wait, there goes my clothes. Didn't really think that one through. Well, at least I can say I'm definitely bigger than a mind flayer now.
"Yes! Break this husk, free us from our prison!" the brain cries out excitedly, as I grip the skull and with a roar, break it apart. It feels… good, to have bone break and crumble beneath my grip. I catch the brain as it falls free, looking at it for a moment. It quivers in my hand, and my parasite sings to me. This thing was made to serve the mind flayers, and I feel my tadpole reaching out to it. I don't stop it, feeling my mind intermingle with the creature and slave it to my will. I feel a… rumbling when I do so, and somewhere, I get the feeling I just pissed something off, but meh.
Dropping it, I watch as tentacles grow from the exposed brain, along with four long, spindly legs with long black claws.
"We are free, our freedom is ours. Friend!" it says. "We must go to the helm… at the helm we are needed! Come, Friend- Come, Master! Us knows the way."
"Man, that's fucking weird," Julia says, tilting her head as she leans down to poke Us. It jumps back, turning to her.
"Thrall?" Us asks me.
"Yeah, that's my companion. She's just a servant, ignore her," I say smugly. "You said something about the helm?"
"Yes! To the helm we go. We are going to the helm… We are needed!" Us agrees.
Optional Objective Complete: Recruit Us!
Summon (Pet) Added
[Us!]
An Intellect Devourer found aboard the Nautiloid and enslaved to your will.
"You're keeping it?" Julia asks as I let my Oni form fade. Fuck it, guess I'm fighting with my sword out.
"Damn right, I am," I agree, kneeling down to stroke the exposed brain. "I always did want a pet."
As we finish looting everything not nailed down, including some freaky tablets that project shit into your mind, we move on with our new pet. We don't get far.
As we move through an area that's exposed to the outside, showing that this thing is both a ship and also fucking flying over a desolate wasteland, we get interrupted. Jumping over me in a very dramatic backflip, the bitch elf returns, wielding a big ass sword.
"Abomination! This is your end," the weird, yellow-skinned elf declares. She has two black lines that I can't tell if they're tattooed or painted across her face, under her eyes and brownish markings around her eyes as well. Her nose is tiny and almost sunk into her face, with her ears being much larger than the ones on the elf I just broke. Huh, maybe she isn't an elf.
She's the one who left me behind, huh? As I go to speak, I feel our minds intermingle, her combat stance dropping as she grips her head. Visions rush through my mind, red dragons, silver swords and then… my face, from her eyes. I feel her parasite reaching out to my mind, but it finds no purchase. It gets nothing from me.
She goes to speak, her face harried and concerned. She doesn't get to as I close the distance, my nerves firing up and red dragon scales growing on my fists as I punch her right in her stupid little nose, the bone crunching beneath my fist.
She falls back, grunting in pain before she executes an impressive roll, back on her feet in an instant.
"Tsk'va. You are no thrall. Vlaakith blesses me this day!" Lae'zel- as I know her from her own memories- says. "Together, we might yet survive this day."
"What the fuck are you talking about?" I ask, her eyes lingering on the way the dragon scales are growing up my arm and over my body, serving as make-shift armour.
"Look around, fool. We are in Avernus, the first hell. I thought you a mind flayer's thrall, slaved to their design. I watched them implant you, and yet our minds remain our own," Lae'zel says. "Most unusual. Until these parasites are removed, our minds and bodies are tainted, and our lives are short. Within days, we will become ghaik. Mind Flayers. I am Lae'zel of Crèche K'liir. Your strength… is impressive. It will serve us well in the coming fight."
As she speaks, she raises her hand to her broken nose, grunting as she forces it back into shape. Okay, so she's pretty badass. We'll call it even then.
"We're going to the helm," I say, standing down.
"Agreed. Even if we could escape the Nautilod, death is all that awaits us in Avernus. That… abomination seems to think you are a mind flayer already. It may be of use. The devils have invaded the ship, and will not let us pass easily," Lae'zel agrees. "Follow my lead-"
"No. I don't take orders. You want to come with us, you follow my lead, Githyanki," I retort, arms crossed as I call on Oni to partially transform, my muscles bulging. I don't let it transform me any further, but it helps as she lets out a snarl.
Julia raises an eyebrow as Lae'zel looks at her, but it shouldn't be hard to tell we're related. Especially if our eyes are matching now. We've always looked somewhat alike.
"Shka'keth! We have no time for this," Lae'zel growls, stepping closer as I stare down at her. Once more, her eyes linger on my scales before she lets out a tsk sound and backs away. "So be it. Until you prove incompetent, at least. Now, let us not waste any more time."
Optional Objective Complete: Recruit Lae'zel of Crèche K'liir!
On that, we can agree.
Even from here, I can see a handful of small, red flying humanoid creatures with horns and tails. They're about half the size of a regular human, with four black horns growing from their bald heads.
"You have no weapon?" Lae'zel asks. "Or armour?"
"I am a weapon," I retort, turning to the imps and letting out a roar. Lae'zel gasps as I embrace my Oni transformation, growing in size as my thundering charge alerts the imps. Not fast enough as I reach the closest one, grasping it with two massive hands and letting out a shout as I grip it by the head with one hand, the other around its body and pull. Even the other imps freeze at the sight of me literally ripping one of their kin's heads off. "Htak'a, Lae'zel. Fight."
She blinks at my use of her language before she lets out a war cry and charges forward. The imp's surprise does not last, as one flings a fireball at her, which she ducks under, her charge barely slowing. I toss the skull at the closest, crushing the body beneath my feet as I charge. Imps are devils, and I'm pretty sure fire isn't going to help here, but it isn't going to help them either as a fireball strikes me and is absorbed into my skin. The creature lets out a panicked cry and tries to fly away before I grab its tail and yank it back down.
With a menacing grin, I bite down on its neck, my massive fangs piercing the red skin without any resistance as I tear off a large chunk of the creature's neck. Incredibly hot blood pours down my throat and coats my face, and I hear a whispered 'holy fuck' from Julia as I toss away the rapidly dying creature. I should be disgusted as I swallow a mouthful of imp, but I am not.
Lae'zel slices through the one that attacked her, cleaving from right shoulder to the left of its waist, the upper half of the body just… sliding off as she lets out a cry. Us leaps at a flying one, claws bisecting its stomach as Us lets out a giggle of triumph, watching it fall from the air.
One left. It tries to flee, but with Impulse sending my nervous system into overdrive, it can't hope to move fast enough. A desperate blast of fire comes my way, and I once again absorb it before I leap and grasp the little bastard, pulling it down to earth and slamming it against the floor. My foot follows up, slamming into the skull of the squealing creature, bone breaking and gore exploding out from me as I laugh.
"Julia, loot them," I order, getting a shout of agreement as she moves.
"You- what are you?" Lae'zel asks, her head tilted back to look up at me as I let out a laugh.
"One of a kind," I reply simply, a little smug at having gotten more than her. Technically, I got three since Us is my summon. "Lets move, there will be more."
Lae'zel turns to Julia, about to speak, before she notices that Julia is placing a hand on the last of the imps, its body vanishing. Julia just gives Lae'zel a challenging stare as I shrink back down. [Oni] is great, but it's too damn big to be convenient for moving around.
As we move through the ship, I hear someone shouting for help. It doesn't take us long to find her, trapped in another pod. Now that is an elf. Not a frog-looking yellow thing, but a pointy eared white chick.
"You! Get me out of this thing!" she shouts, banging on the 'glass' of the pod. It's not regular glass, but fuck if I know what it actually is.
"Come, we have no time for stragglers," Lae'zel says, but I just snort as I approach the pod and examine it. There's a console next to it… but fuck if I know what any of it says. Well, when in doubt...
"Don't you dare leave me! Get me-" the elf says before trailing off as I once more grow into a ten-foot-tall Oni. Gripping the sides of the pod with my massive hands, I let out a grunt of effort as I simply tear the lid off entirely. Stumbling out of the pod, she falls to her knees for a moment, gasping as she rises. She's dressed in silver armour, with long black hair tied back into a braid. Basically, she's cute. "At last. I thought that damn thing was going to be my coffin. Thank you-"
Her words are cut off as our minds merge, for just a moment. Once again, the parasite in her head finds no purchase on my mind, but her own mind is briefly open to me, even shrouded in shadow as it is.
"Guess you got an unwelcome guest in your head as well?" I ask, my voice far deeper and thunderous in my Oni form. I watch her gasp and steady herself before she nods warily.
"I did. What- what was that?" Shadowheart (yes, really, that's what she calls herself), says. I can sense her caution, the side-eye she's giving Lae'zel.
"Psychic fuckery. That's the best explanation I've got so far. Our parasites connecting," I explain with a shrug. "We're going to the helm, you coming with?"
"I'm not staying here, if that's what you're asking. Neither Avernus or this ship are great places to be alone," she agrees with a frown. "I'm Shadowheart. I- one moment."
She turns, looking around with an almost desperate expression, before she spots some weird thing near her pod. Her worry turns to relief as she picks up a… spiky many-sided box? You know, she literally couldn't look more shifty if she tried as she stashes it away, giving us the side-eye.
I sense a plot device.
Optional Objective Complete: Recruit Shadowheart!
"Valen. This is Lae'zel and my sister, Julia," I introduce. "Now let's get the hell out of here."
"'Shadowheart'?" Julia whispers to me as she finishes grabbing everything not nailed down. I just snort as we move on.
With Us guiding… well, us, it doesn't take long to reach the helm. Just in time to watch the most bitchmade mind flayer of all lose to three imps, their claws cutting it open as it falls. In its defence, I can see several dead devils around it, all larger than imps. Closer to us, another mindflayer lets out a psychic blast and knocks away a particularly dangerous looking devil, wielding a flaming sword. It turns to us, its voice echoing through our heads.
"Thrall. Connect the nerves of the transponder. We must escape. Now."
And leave behind a flaming sword? I don't fucking think so.
"Do it. We will deal with the ghaik after we escape," Lae'zel whispers.
"Clearly you weren't listening, vin'isk. I do not take orders," I reply, her eyes widening as I once again use her own language. Vin'isk means roughly 'minion' or 'underling'.
Turning back, I let out a roar as I throw my hand forward. My own flames, along with all those I've absorbed, burst from it in the shape of a spear, flying forward and striking the surprised mind flayer. The fact that it was so confident in their fucking little worms that it didn't question the naked ten-foot-tall monster means it deserves this Darwin Award as I charge in.
"Chk," Lae'zel mutters, following my lead. The devil, whom I can only assume is Commander Zhalk, doesn't rest, slicing into the mind flayer with his flaming sword, causing the mind flayer to once again unleash a psychic blast. I stumble in my charge, but not enough as I grab its skull with one hand and a handful of the tentacles protruding from its face, tearing them off as it lets out a cry of pain, the tentacles tearing free and unleashing a inky black blood as I toss them away.
Zhalk isn't as stupid as the mind flayer, immediately trying to skewer me as his blade slashes against my dragon scales, the flames lapping against my body, before he has to use his blade to block Lae'zel's attempt to cut off his head. I just grab the mindflayer by the legs and swing, the squealing squid smashing against the confused devil.
I see Shadowheart hitting a fucking demon boar with her mace as I beat Zhalk with the mind flayer. It isn't particularly effective, but it is a good distraction as Lae'zel rolls under one of his swings and slices through his heel with her blade. Tossing the mind flayer away, I grab Zhalk as he goes to fall, letting out a roar as I grab his head with both hands and twist, snapping his neck with a satisfying crack. Us jumps onto the fallen mind flayer, clawing at its face like the good little attack dog it is.
Sorry, Zhalk. Shouldn't have had a nice sword.
Mine now. Picking it up, I look at it with a smile. It's a greatsword, but in the hands of my Oni form, it is far more fitting as a one-handed weapon. The 'nerves' are just ahead, with a few imps and boars in our way, which we make short work of… but I can't help but notice something.
Where's my fourth optional objective?
[Escape the Nautilod]
Objective: Escape from the Ilithid Nautilod before it's too late.
Optional Objective: Slay Commander Zhalk and the Mind Flayer in the Helm (Complete).
Optional Objectives: Recruit Us (Complete), Recruit Lae'zel (Complete), Recruit Shadowheart (Complete), ???
Reward: Survival. Two Rolls.
…I'm not going fucking anywhere, and I grab Lae'zel as she goes to touch them, pulling her back.
"Have you lost your mind, istik? We must leave!" Lae'zel shouts, before I grab her by the throat and lift her from the ground. Julia gives me a raised eyebrow, but with my blood so boiling, I am in no mood for disagreement.
"We are not done here," I growl, her eyes widening. My words are proven true as the door we came through bursts open, two more of the human-sized devils entering.
They pause as they see me snap my head toward them, readying their weapons as I charge. Is it you? Are you my final objective, you bastards?
– Lae'zel of Crèche K'liir –
Watching Valen charge, she could only rub her throat and curse her traitorous body. He looked like a human when he was not transformed, and had claimed the girl who followed him as kin, but she did not believe it. How could she, when his very presence screamed draconic.
The scales across his form, the way he laughed as he was hit by fire, the fire he unleashed. His strength was extraordinary, his endurance unquestionable as he ignored another attempt to skewer him, the spear finding no purchase on his scaled body. The cambion could do nothing but scream as Valen bit down on his neck, tearing away a chunk of flesh with a laugh, his massive hand backhanding the second away. The first fell, clutching at his ruined throat, and Lae'zel refused to be idle as she fired her crossbow at it, the round striking true and ending the fiend's life.
"Come on, fight!" Valen mocked as he stomped toward the downed second cambion, whose head was still swimming from the blow. He swung his stolen blade, flames roaring from it as the cambion tried to block with his own less impressive weapon. The enchanted greatsword, coated in flame and wielded by such a behemoth, barely even slowed as it knocked the blade back into the cambion's chest and then dug into the neck of the downed fiend.
Grabbing both bodies, he carried them over with a triumphant, bloody smile, tossing them to Julia, who calmly collected them both into her… whatever she had. Each step caused the monstrously large manhood to swing, her eyes drawn downward as Valen grinned at her.
He dared call her vin'isk as if he were one of Gith's own, commanded her as if he were kith'rak, and yet as he stared her down, she merely averted her eyes, head bowed in submission. Her needy quim soaked her undergarments, hot with desire and a primal need.
"Now, we can go," Valen announced, blood coating his chin and chest as he walked past her. She stepped aside, her posture submissive as if before Vlaakith's chosen. How… vexing.
As he connected the nerves, the ship shuddered as it made its jump from this plane. It was damaged by both her kin and the devils, the jump causing them all to lurch forward, and she knew the ship was going to crash. She only hoped they found themselves somewhere more secure than the Nine Hells.
Valen let out a growl of annoyance as they reappeared in what seemed to be the mortal plane from the blue skies, the ship descending rapidly. He clicked his fingers, the Intellect Devourer vanishing as he turned to them.
Without a word, he grabbed her and threw her over his shoulder as if she was some… damsel in need of rescue, before he tossed his kin on top of her, holding them both in place with one muscular arm, doing the same with the elf.
"Do you know what you're doing?" Shadowheart demanded, looking equally as put out as Lae'zel felt. Valen just laughed as he looked out from the damaged ship, seeing the ground rapidly approaching.
"No!" Valen admitted, beginning to run before he leapt out of the hole. He had timed it to be closer to the ground, but they were still falling a considerable distance before he let out a shout and unleashed a blast of fire from his feet. It was hardly controlled, but the blast slowed their descent, sending them up a small amount before they began to plummet again, repeating the process several times before they made landfall with a loud thud as his feet hit the beach floor. He let out a roar of pain, the sound of something snapping beneath them, and her stomach hurt from the sudden stop, his shoulder ramming into it, but as he fell forward, the four of them tumbling into a messy pile, they were alive.
"Damn it, Valen. You've broken your ankles," Shadowheart mumbled, casting a healing spell upon him but clearly to limited effect. "But I suppose it's better than crashing with the ship. Thank you."
"Are you going to be okay?" Julia asked, a hint of concern in her often mocking tone.
"Someone grab my sword," Valen ordered, sitting on the sand. She did so, picking up the dropped blade and walking back to him. He simply grabbed the blade's edge, the flames flickering as he let out a sigh of relief, absorbing the endless flames into his body. It was slow, but his legs let out a strange crack as they seemed to force themselves back into shape. He let out a quiet laugh, his body shrinking and his scales retracting as he rose. "I'll live."
His strength was… truly impressive.
– Valen Edwards –
That really fucking hurt. Note to self, don't use something you saw in a fucking A-Team movie as a genuine plan. I remember them driving a tank out of a plane and using the cannon to slow and control their descent, but it wasn't exactly sound logic. I can't fly with my fire, but I can let out explosive blasts, and my fuck up with the pool earlier showed that the concussive force of the blasts could still hurt and, more importantly, move me.
Wait, didn't they have a bunch of parachutes as well in the movie? Huh.
[Escape the Nautilod] Complete!
Objective: Escape from the Ilithid Nautilod before it's too late. (Complete)
Optional Objective: Slay Commander Zhalk and the Mind Flayer in the Helm (Complete).
Optional Objectives: Recruit Us (Complete), Recruit Lae'zel (Complete), Recruit Shadowheart (Complete), Kill the reinforcing Cambions in the Helm (Complete)
Reward: Survival. Two Rolls for the main objective. One Roll for Slaying Zhalk and the Mind Flayer, Everburn Blade added to Items (Armour and Weapons), One Roll for all Optional Objectives. Four Rolls total.
Rolling. Results: Common, Common, Mythical, Epic
[Bat Form] - Common
You are able to turn into a bat or a bat hybrid at will. Gaining enhanced agility, senses, sonar, flight, claws, and sharp teeth, as well as any other characteristics the average Bat would possess.
"Oi, Julia. Come here," I order, watching her blink before she moves over to my side. Placing my hand on her shoulder, I focus and transfer this one to her. I don't wanna be a fucking bat, what I am, a vampire? This kind of edgy shit is best suited for her.
[Tome of the Tentacle (Astral/Shadow School)] - Common
A tome detailing spells related to tentacles. Conjure tentacled mutations and creatures from the depths to restrain and constrict your enemies, keeping them right where you want them.
"Yeah, don't want this either," I decide, tossing the creepy looking book, which has three purple tentacles growing out of it, to her. "You can be the mage, I want to punch shit."
"Aww, you do care," Julia teases, kissing my cheek.
[Panacea: Shaper] - Mythical
Allows you to freely manipulate flesh and biomaterials with perfect precision down to a cellular level through contact. The larger the power level difference between you and the target, the more they can resist your changes.
Holy fuck. After a long moment of deliberation, I make my decision. Julia gasps as I push this one into her as well. It's not quite as good as having Pan-Pan, but I actually kinda trust her with this, and I don't want to play healer either, even if this is more than just that. It'll help her stay safe, and be useful to the party.
"Are you sure?" Julia asks quietly, and I just nod.
"I am. Don't make me regret this," I say simply.
[Aura] - Epic
You have a small energy field that is the manifestation of your very soul, both increasing your physical strength and protecting you from blows. Having Aura both allows you to gain a Semblance, a unique power, and to awaken Aura in other people.
And with a flash of fiery red, my aura forms around me causing Lae'zel and Shadowheart to gasp.
"So. Where the fuck are we?" I finally ask, turning back to them as Julia stands by my side, a smug smile on her face.
"What are you?" Shadowheart finally asks, and I just shrug.
"Naked."